SciFi and Fantasy Stories
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'Fazad - Part A'


 
 

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Click For MoreDocument 1 out of 23 by Brendon Adam Shapiro.

SciFi and Fantasy Stories: Fazad - Part A

The Land of Fazad is one of many Lands in the World of Abole. Strange things are brewing in Fazad, some surprising, some pleasant, and some not so pleasant. Meet Kipote, a young man just beginning his journey into learning magic. He is barely aware of the future that awaits.
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Prologue

               

                It was a disgustingly hot day in the city of Dazaf that morning, not helping King Faokan’s already severely unpleasant mood. This was supposed to be a happy day for him. And yet, something unusual had to happen to mess it up. Something unusual always had to happen in this stupid world. Smoke it all!

                Massaging his stressed out head, King Faokan stared across his regal throne room, absentmindedly observing one of the young guards who seemed to be sniffing his helmet suspiciously. The King eyes stayed fixed on the young man for about half a minute, not really observing him, but thinking about the dire situation he faced, before he realized that he should probably be listening to what his royal advisor, Maestraele, was telling him, instead of drifting off.

                “…you probably already know, this situation may cause a lot of problems for the Land of Fazad, sire.” she was saying.

                “Yes, I have realized that, Maestraele. Stop generalizing. How are we going to choose my successor?” he snapped.

                “Well, that’s just it, sire. There really is no precedent for this sort of thing. The only similar incident occurred roughly 200 years ago in the Land of Cuacuo, when Queen Fbabfa had twins. However, one died when they were 17 years of age, and so they never needed to make a decision. It is rumored that one had the other assassinated.”

                “That wouldn’t surprise me.” King Faokan managed to chuckle.

                “So, without an example to follow, we’re going to have to find a way to decide which of the three will be heir to the Fazadi throne. I do humbly offer a few suggestions, sire.”

                Maestraele paused until the King nodded to go on. Her suggestions were usually helpful. And she knew her place, unlike his previous advisor, Yuttle, who had tried everything except direct mind control to influence his decisions. Maybe he had even tried that.

                “Well, there are a few choices. We could wait until they are older, and decide then which one seems most suited for the job. We could hold an election when the time comes. Or there is one other way, but I hate to even invite the idea…”

                “What is it, Maestraele?”

                “Not that I think it proper, but it may in fact be best for Fazad, sire. Disposing of two of them before this whole “triplets” thing ever gets out to the press. Imagine the headlines. ‘Fazadi Crisis: Next Heir to Throne Still a Mystery’ or ‘King Faokan Must Pick his Favorite Son’.”

                King Faokan turned purple. She was right. It would be best for Fazad. The last thing that this Land needed right now was another political mess. He could just imagine Fazad divided into three feuding sections fifteen years from now. It was enough to make his stomach smolder. Maybe it was best… No! How could he even be thinking that! He would be a father first, a King second. That is what he promised Jailyn when they had agreed to have a child. He had never expected three though…

                “I think the election is the best choice,” he said, before he could let his mind turn the other way again. “Hopefully our nation will stay united despite the inevitable controversies that will erupt. I have enough faith in the Fazadi though, Maestraele. They are a strong people, and will get through this.”

                She didn’t look convinced, but bowed before him. “I’m sure you would like to see your new sons now, King Faokan, and congratulate your wife on a successful delivery. I will leave you.”

                “No, that can wait,” he said, dismissing the notion. “Is there anything else I need to be informed of?”

                “Well, just one minor issue. Green Priority.”

                “What is it?”

                “The Cebaltan Games, sire. Many on the Fazadi Council feel that, due to our current economic crisis, this is one expenditure that should be cut. Not only does it cost us a lot of money to organize the event, but the Mights are requesting that the prize money for the winning team be increased.”

                “I love the Cebaltan Games!” shouted the King. “They provide excellent entertainment for our people. Besides, without the Games, what purpose do the Mights and their Apprentices serve? The last time they were used for actual defense was over 100 years ago.”

                “Precisely the Council’s point, sire. In fact, I’ll quote Councilor Nema.” Maestraele flipped through a packet of papers until she came to the right page, and then continued, “At the last Council Gathering, Nema said, ‘If these magicians’ solitary purpose is for our entertainment once a month, why should the Fazadi Government continue to give them our support? We have more important things to worry about, like providing food for every family, and keeping our borders safe. I say, scrap the Games. They are a drain on our economy. If it means an end to the Mights and their Apprentices, so be it.’”

                The King sighed. That Nema was such a loudmouth. The problem was, he had a way of swaying the Council’s vote his direction. However, this issue, being Green Priority, required both his and the Council’s vote in order to pass.

                “What was their vote?”

                “10 to 3, sire, in favor of cutting the Games,” she said at once.

                This was a big decision he had to make now. Cutting the Games would essentially extinguish Fazad of all magic. The time of magic was coming to a close it seemed. It had certainly outlived its usefulness. Other lands, like Predila and Dormil, had already made it illegal to conduct magic of any kind inside their borders. Others were facing the same crisis. Magic was simply becoming too much of a drain on the economy. And it was unwise to go against such a majority vote in the Council.

                Smoke the Council! I’m the King, and I if I want to keep the Games, then I’ll keep them!

                Inform the Council that they can be unanimous and I still will not close the Games!” he spat. “Fazad will not surrender in to these anti-magic pressures like some other Lands have. I will not give in to those… those… well, anyway, tell them that Fazad will continue to put on the Cebaltan Games. The King does not agree.”

                 “Yes, sire,” she said, looking slightly alarmed at his decision. She walked smoothly from his throne room.

                As soon as she was gone, King Faokan buried his face into his arms. So much to think about. So much to worry about. He had just made a lot of enemies with that decision. Smoke Nema and that self-important Council!

                He supposed he had better go see his three newborn sons now, pretend to be overjoyed, and congratulate Jailyn.

                He decided to take a short nap first.

 

? ? ?

               

                Might Angarooka stepped along the cold dark hallway of her stone castle, her footsteps echoing delicately, bouncing forever among the walls and sculptures of her domicile. She snapped her large pink fingers, and the candles on the walls suddenly sprouted small flames, providing a touch of illumination. She snapped her fingers again, and the flames grew slightly larger, lighting the hallway a bit more. Satisfied, she continued on, and turned to the right into a giant room, filled with even more of the ostentatious and grotesque sculptures than there were lining the hallway. This was her study, and bedroom, where Angarooka did most of her scheming. She sat herself down at her big desk crafted of dark brown banda wood, which had been carved into gaudy and atrocious shapes. She shifted her large self until she was in a suitable position on her chair.

                “GOLSGOOD!!” she shrieked, her voice magnified outrageously by the cold echoing. “COME HERE!”

                Almost immediately, she heard the pitter patter of Golsgood’s footsteps dashing in her direction. The tiny bald man appeared in her doorway, perspiring and frightened. “Yes, Might?”

                “Have you sent out the message yet?” she spat.

                “Glad to hear it,” Golsgood said nervously.

                “What!?”

                “Glad to hear it!”

                “What are you talking about, you fool? I asked you a question!”

                “Of course, Might. I’ll be back in a few moments!” Golsgood spluttered, as he rushed out of the room in a panic. Angarooka sat in her chair, completely flabbergasted. 

                Moron!” she exclaimed to herself. “I’ll have to replace that one soon, before it drives me crazy.” 

                Golsgood returned a few minutes later, carrying a tray of mint cookies. He held them out to her, trying not to look at her, and yet trying not to look like he was trying not to look at her. Angarooka smacked the tray out of his hands, and it went flying across the room, cookies tumbling everywhere.

                “What do you think you are doing, you brainless mule? I did not ask for these!”

                “Oh my goodness gracious, had I but known, I would never…” Golsgood’s pitiful noises were interrupted by a very loud…

                “DO NOT TALK, GOLSGOOD! I ASKED YOU A VERY SIMPLE QUESTION! DID YOU, OR DID YOU NOT, SEND OUT MY MESSAGE?”

                “Yes, I did,” he gulped. “I did indeed.”

                “GOOD! NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!” she roared.

                Golsgood was almost out of the room, when suddenly he stopped in the doorway, and slowly, regretting every moment, began to turn around.

                “Might, I’m sorry, but I believe you said you would like to inspect the newcomers today. Would now be a good time?” he peeped. Angarooka sighed.

                “Yes, I suppose.”

                “No?” he looked surprised.

                “I SAID YES, GOLSGOOD!!!”

                “Oh my! I’ll send them in then,” Golsgood bowed, and turned to leave.

                “Oh, wait!” she said, and Golsgood did a little anxious leap into the air.

                “Yes?” he squeaked, spinning around.

                “Would you bring me a tray of mint cookies?”

                “Yes, don’t worry, he contacted me this morning! He said it fit his daughter perfectly.” And with that, Golsgood left, before she could ask anything else of him.

                Grumbling to herself, Angarooka put Golsgood and his incompetence out of her mind. She replaced it with thoughts of Boatax’s face when he received the message. It was a good image. Boatax opening the envelope. Boatax scanning the page. Boatax coming to the sentence that would make his eyes pop out of his head. Oh, what she wouldn’t give to see that! She was so caught up in her delightful thoughts, she hardly noticed the line of people entering her room.

                It was a group of young men and women, looking thoroughly unhappy and messy. The two young men were barefoot and shirtless, wearing nothing but plain white shorts. They looked starved and beaten, and their eyes were sad and cold. The three young women wore plain white dresses, and were also barefoot. They looked just as miserable. All five of them were dirty and their hair was unkempt.

                Angarooka looked them all over, noted their posture and physical strength.

                “NAMES?” she roared. They recited their names, down in a line.

                Truvalt.”

                Briaba.”

                Uya.”

                Buodonto.”

                Rablasaka.”

                “Good,” said Angarooka. “Now, will you all demonstrate your powers?”

                 They all did so, each having either abilities that involved fire, like her, or having abilities that involved water. Some seemed to have an easier time than others, but all of them seemed, while untrained, to have strong raw power, and met her standards.

                “You all pass. Back into your cell,” she said dismissively. The five of them began to walk towards the door. She was pleased. Her scouts had done well in their search. Certainly those five had the potential to beat anything that any of the other Mights could produce. Their training would begin tomorrow.

 She called for her guards, kaustices - muscular and gruesome beings, with wiry sinuous bodies, and dripping fangs. Once they were stationed at her door, she knew that no one was getting in there again tonight. Now she could sleep without worry. As she lay in bed, Angarooka was in high spirits. Everything was going according to plan.

In the middle of the night, she got up, picked up one of the mint cookies off the floor, and ate it. Then she went back to bed.

 

Chapter One

 

Kipote held the green still-liquid box protectively in his hands, eyes darting around nervously. He was alone, walking through one of the last great banda forests of Fazad. He had always thought of Fazad as one of the most beautiful Lands in the world. Filled with interesting natural landmarks, spectacular landscapes, and air that was refreshing and pure to fill your lungs with, Kipote loved everything about Fazad. He knew it was probably just his bias of having grown up near the city of Preazilok and having spent all of his life within Fazad’s borders that influenced his opinion, but there was no denying the breathtaking scenery of the banda forest, at least.

                The trees were bold and fun to look at. Thick, healthy, russet branches curved cartoonishly all around the forest above him. In many cases, these branches had grown to connect to a branch of a different tree across the path, conjoining to form one huge plant. Kipote was walking beneath a maze of freely twisting branches, a crazy natural ceiling. And the vivid orange leaves of the banda trees made the whole forest cheerful and lively. As the young man stepped, the chipper crunching of the leaves awoke beneath his feet.

                He had no time to appreciate the beauty of the forest, however; Kipote’s mind was on the small green box he held. The box was about the size of his closed fist, and its still-liquid material felt cool on his hands. Although it maintained its cube shape, it continuously flowed and rippled very slowly and gently, soothing the tense muscles in his fingers and palms. The still-liquid was slightly translucent, especially in the bright sunlight of the Banda Forest.

                Kipote was a fairly handsome young man. He wasn’t that tall, but he had a good build that came from working in the fields for much of his youth, harvesting frestle. He had large blue eyes, creative blond hair, and a tiny mouth, that became even tinier whenever he was anxious or scared. As he walked through the forest, it was experiencing tininess like it had never known before.

                None of them know where you are. Stop worrying so much, you crazy kid! There is absolutely no way anyone is following you. Nothing is going to go wrong. Don’t get stressed out!”

                He stopped and looked behind him, just to make sure. Nobody was in sight. Listening carefully, he heard no sound except a few rodents scampering about and his heart thudding in his chest. Breathing in and out deeply, trying to calm himself down, Kipote continued to walk. His foot caught on a big branch that had fallen from the canopy, and he stumbled slightly, but his hands remained tight around the box. As he took another step, and a jolt of pain shot through his feet, he realized he had twisted his ankle. He yanked off his sandal and massaged the area that seemed to be sprained.

                Just what I needed. Ugh! I have to make it to Boatax’s cabin before the second sun goes down, and now it’s not going to be so easy! I don’t want to be in this forest in the dark!

                The first sun was already beginning to set, and it wouldn’t be long before the second followed suit. And Kipote was still a good half hour from Boatax. He got up quickly, and began limping along the trail, as fast as he could. It wasn’t pleasant, but not too bad. Bearable.

                “Hey, I’m a cool guy. A little pain doesn’t faze me. I can take it,” he said aloud to the forest, trying to convince himself.

                “Oh, yeah. The coolest guy I’ve ever met, that’s for sure.” A sarcastic voice. Olsda. Kipote spun around, sending hot shards of agony through his foot. He cried out, although he wasn’t sure whether it was because of his ankle or the sight of Olsda. She was staring at the box.

                “How in the world did you find me? Smoke, Olsda! I found the box, and you’re not taking it from me again. Please don’t do it,” Kipote begged. Realizing how childish he was acting, he did his best to regain some composure.

                Shh… quiet down. The others will find you too if you don’t keep the jabbering to a minimum. Stop worrying, I won’t use boara, I’ve been restricted, remember?” Olsda scowled.

                Kipote felt relief fill his throat and chest, but confusion took its place. “Then why are you here if you know that you don’t have any control over me?”

                “Oh, but I do have supremacy in this situation, my colleague,” Olsda grinned. The dark-haired young woman would often get like this, taking up a more sophisticated vocabulary, when she was having fun. “I could scream, allowing Razzi and Wyba to ascertain our current whereabouts. I perceived them both relatively near this location only a short interval of time ago. You don’t want either of them finding you, do you? You could never keep the box from them.”

                “You wouldn’t do it,” Kipote said angrily.

                “Oh, but I would,” she smiled mischievously. “I have nothing to lose in this situation. You, however, my friend, do.”

                Kipote scowled. “What do you want then, Olsda?”

                “We share the credit,” she said quickly. “I’d settle for that, and you’d be wise to as well.”

                “You are pure evil, Olsda, taking advantage of me in my state. I need this boost, and I deserve it. It wasn’t easy to find the box this time; I had to do a lot of work. First, I…”

                “Tell me some other time, Kipote. It’s getting dark, we need to hurry. Razzi’s nearby, I can feel it. C’mon!”

                Kipote struggled to keep up with Olsda’s pace, doing his best not to look like a weakling, limping along. Why did he have to trip over that stupid log?

 

? ? ?

 

                Boatax’s cabin was in the center of the Banda Forest, built of the same curvy chocolate wood that surrounded it. He would never cut down any of these trees, though, he loved them too much. Kipote supposed that the cabin was made from logs he had found on the forest floor.

                He was waiting there, on the patio out front, with his owl perched on his shoulder. When he saw Kipote and Olsda walking together towards him with the stilliquid box, his eyebrows narrowed. What was this?

                Foltweok, the owl, swooped down to the two youths and grasped the box from Kipote before he could react. Boatax outstretched his hands, and felt the smooth cool box fall into his palms. He flapped out his robes, and quickly hid it somewhere deep within its folds.

                “You’ve done well, Apprentices,” the man thundered genially, approaching them with open arms. “But since when do the two of you work as one?”

                Kipote, out of breath from trying to keep up with Olsda, embraced the old man, and then backed away to allow her to do the same. He then let her explain the story they had fabricated during the walk.

                “Kipote was the one who discovered the box, Might, and that is why he deserves most credit. However, he wouldn’t have been able to obtain the box without my help, since there was a wild kaustice guarding it. I helped to lure it away, while Kipote grabbed the box. Together, we secured its safe return to your hands, and that is why I ask for a share.”

                Boatax smiled. “I don’t know. Foltweok, what do you think?” He turned to the owl. It gave a skeptical krooooot, shot a look of hatred at Olsda, and fluttered off into the orange leaves to do some hunting. The man looked back at the two.

                “Well, although I seriously doubt that there’s any truth to your story, Olsda, considering that no one to my knowledge has yet been able to outrun a kaustice, I am grateful at least to see that somebody found the box. Might Vangolo told me that it was hidden it in an especially difficult location this time. You will both receive a boost. Kipote, congratulations on your first success.”

                Kipote felt happiness like he had never known fill his body, and his mouth became significantly less tiny. He had been afraid that Olsda was going to receive all the credit. Finally, he would receive the initiation of his power! He would no longer be helpless to the tauntings and intimidations of his magical peers.

                He wondered what his power would be as he followed Olsda and Boatax inside the lodge. Olsda and Razzi could control boara, the power of fire. Razzi had a stronger grasp of boara than Olsda, and even more so now than usual. Olsda had been cut off from it as of late - she had accidentally set fire to Foltweok while she slept, and Boatax had not been happy. Neither had Foltweok.

Wyba and Surbano, on the other hand, could control ioba, a power more oriented with water. Kipote preferred ioba to boara, and hoped that it would be his natural calling. But honestly, he was just thankful that he would be initiated soon. He would take either gratefully.

“I will call the others back here, using mind delivery and inform them that the search is over. You have both done well, and may rest until they return. We will then perform the ceremonies and have dinner,” Boatax said. 

“Thank you, Might,” they both chimed, and he nodded, dismissing them. He then proceeded into his study. Olsda gave Kipote an odd look.

“Thank you, Kipote. You didn’t have to let me get away with that,” she said. The first time he had ever seen her even slightly embarrassed. He didn’t really know how to respond.

“Oh! No problem. It’s not like it took anything away from me…I’m still going to be initiated. And it’s about time you got your powers back.”

She gave a slight smile.

“Yeah, well thanks again. I’m sorry I’m such a monster,” she said. “It’s from my father’s side of the family.”

They bid each other farewell, and Kipote made his way upstairs to his room. He pulled off his light brown shirt - the air was getting hot and muggy - and dumped himself down on his bed.  It wasn’t really his room - he shared it with the other two young men, Razzi and Surbano. He had the bed closest to the window, and he looked out of it now. It offered a fine view of the forest, and Kipote could see the last peels of sunlight gleaming off the orange banda canopy. A nurturing evening breeze fluffed the leaves around, emitting a peaceful whisper of nature. Kipote didn’t know he had fallen asleep, until Razzi shook him awake an hour later.

 

Chapter Two

               

                “Wake up, kid,” Razzi said urgently. “Or I’ll set you ablaze.”

                Rubbing his eyes, Kipote sat up. Razzi always called him kid, not because of any age difference - they were virtually the same age - but because Razzi had superior powers. It usually angered Kipote, but not today. Thoughts of his initiation returned to his mind, and he smiled.

                “C’mon, man! Boatax wants us downstairs immediately.” Razzi dashed out of the room, his crazed red hair jouncing around as he left. Kipote stretched, loosening his muscles, and quickly put on some clean clothes, something a bit more formal. Taking the stairs two at a time - until his ankle reminded him to take it easy - he met everyone else in the front room. Almost everyone.

                “Where’s Surbano?” Kipote asked curiously. Boatax seemed to ignore his question.

                “We shall now perform our evening ceremonies. We have two tonight. First we will perform Olsda’s boost. You have reached boara-3 I believe?”

                “Yes, Might,” she smiled.

                “Following that, we shall give Kipote his initiation ceremony. Congratulations, Kipote.”

                “Yeah, it’s about time, dude,” Razzi teased quietly into Kipote’s ear. “I was getting worried you wouldn’t make it in time for the next Cebaltan Games.” Kipote laughed along with him, he was in no mood to get upset.

                “What’s going on, Might?” asked Wyba smoothly, a blonde-haired and very pretty young woman. She had generated herself a glass of water, using ioba, and was sipping from it gracefully. “Surbano should be back by now. And you look concerned about something.”

                “Do not worry yourselves. I will tell you all the information I know after we perform the ceremonies. I don’t want you thinking about anything else right now,” Boatax told everyone. “Let us begin.”

                The four young Apprentices exchanged uneasy glances, before following Boatax across the floor.

                 They entered the small ceremonial room where initiations and boosts always took place. Upon entering, Kipote immediately felt a sense of calm and peace. Boatax had lit two magnificent candles, and filled two crystalline goblets with water, and placed them on a table near the entrance to the room. There was one unlit candle and one empty goblet also on that table. Kipote would either light the candle or fill the goblet, depending on whether he became a wielder of boara or ioba.

                That was for later though. He had to sit through Olsda’s boost first.

                It seemed to last for an outrageously long period of time. Boatax’s speech and then the actual boost itself went on for what felt like hours to Kipote. Finally, Olsda stepped down the platform in the center of the room, looking very radiant, and took her seat among the others as they applauded her.

                “You’d better watch out Razzi, I’m at the same level as you now,” Olsda bragged. Razzi shook his head, and turned towards Kipote.

                “Your turn now, kid. Hope you’re boara,” he said. Kipote gave a nervous smile, and waited for Boatax to set everything up for his initiation. Finally, Boatax looked at him, and gestured towards the platform. Kipote’s mouth decreased in size as he walked over, and stepped up onto it. Boatax began to give his speech.

                “It was Might Vangolo who came up with the idea of the still-liquid box hunt, not I,” he began. “He introduced it to me about ten years ago, and we have both used it ever since, one of us hiding it for the other’s Apprentices to find. It seemed to me to be a good system for a long time. Most often, those who would be ready for an initiation or boost would the ones who have enough determination, skill, and desire to find the box. However, I have decided to abandon these hunts from now on, for one reason. This young man right here.”

                Boatax pointed at Kipote, and he was suddenly alarmed. That couldn’t have been a good thing.

                “I have observed our friend, Kipote, for the past two months, ever since I took him in as an Apprentice. It was my opinion that he deserved to be initiated immediately, merely by examining his attitude towards learning and towards other people. Kipote is generous, forgiving, and compassionate, more so than I thought possible in such a young person, and because of this, was more than ready to receive the initiation.”

                “However, the hunt does not test these important personality traits. It tests strength, but not generosity. Stamina, but not forgiveness. Intelligence, but not compassion. This is why it took Kipote far longer than it should have to receive his initiation. I will strive to find a fairer test in the future, and inform Might Vangolo of my decision. He has always prized physical strengths over mental ones, and that is why he would prefer such a test.”

                “Kipote, by showing me the flaws in my own system, you have helped me greatly. You are more amazing than you realize, I think, and I just know you will do great things. I hope the others will join me in welcoming you to the world of magic.”

                Olsda, Razzi, and Wyba stood up and clapped. Kipote reddened. He did not deserve such praise. Surely Boatax must be thinking of somebody else.

                 “Are you ready for the test?” Boatax asked, as Foltweok soared into the room from outside, and perched on Boatax’s shoulder.

                “Yes, Might.” Kipote said nervously. This was a slightly unpleasant test, and it decided much of his future.

                Boatax, in his serious and powerful voice, gave Kipote directions to take off his shirt, and lie face up on the long table near the back wall, even though the young man knew the whole procedure already, having seen the same thing done to Olsda and Razzi.

                Boatax placed his hands on Kipote’s chest, and he closed his eyes, and muttered some words that were in an unfamiliar ancient dialect. His hands then moved to his stomach, then his forehead. Kipote didn’t feel anything change inside him, like he was expecting. But apparently what Boatax was doing was giving him the seed of his power. That was the analogy Boatax used to explain it. He chose the young men and women that he did because he could sense they would be “fertile soil” for when he planted the “seed” of magic inside them. Some people, Boatax said, were just born as fertile soil, and others weren’t. That seed would grow with each boost he gave them after they accomplished something that merited such a boost. This would all be in the process to becoming a beautiful flower.

                When Boatax was done muttering those words, next came the part that Kipote wasn’t looking forward to. The old man took a bucket of ice cold water from behind him, and dumped all of it out on top of Kipote. It was so freezing cold it was almost unbearable. The other three watched, enjoying the sight of it. This was something they had all had to endure in the past.

                Boatax looked at Kipote, and frowned. “Not an ioba I see. Sorry about that, Kipote, I know you would have preferred that one. Looks like you’re a boara. We’ll have Razzi and Olsda help you get started.

                “Wait!” exclaimed Kipote, shivering. “Are you sure?”

                “Well, I guess I could perform the test for boara if you really want me to. I don’t think it’s necessary though.”

                “Could you please, Might? I just don’t feel like a fiery kind of person,” Kipote said, feeling desperate suddenly, for a reason he couldn’t explain.

                Boatax smiled. “I suppose it can’t hurt. Actually, it may cause some slight pain. Can you fetch me one of those candles off the wall, Razzi?”

                Instead, Razzi produced a candle using boara, and he handed it to Boatax. The man put the flame to Kipote’s chest, singing it a bit. Kipote winced. However, Boatax looked extremely surprised.

                “Strange! Apparently you aren’t a boara either.” Silence. No one moved. Kipote’s heart sank. Was he incapable of having any powers? Did Boatax make a dreadful mistake in choosing him? Was he not fertile soil for the seed of magic? Suddenly Boatax’s eyes lit up.

                “Could you three please leave, for a moment?” Boatax asked. Razzi, Olsda, and Wyba left without any questions. Even Foltweok fluttered out of the room. Boatax stared off into the distance. “Is this possible? Could it be??” His gaze then returned to Kipote. “Hang on one second my boy.” 

                Boatax ran out of the room, leaving Kipote alone, lying there. Thoughts were racing around in his head. What did all this mean?

                A few moments later, Boatax raced back in, holding a small shrub, with a few tiny white flowers on it. He gave it to Kipote, who took hold of it curiously. Suddenly, Kipote began to feel convulsions wrack his body. He had strong spasms, and couldn’t make them end. It was one of the strangest sensations he had ever felt. When Boatax grabbed the shrub away from him, the convulsions immediately stopped.

                Kipote tried to clear his mind and recover from the incident. When he did, he noticed that Boatax was smiling, pure joy etched across his face.

                “I never thought I’d see another one!” he exclaimed. “I can’t believe it. There weren’t supposed to be any others!”

                “What, Might? What!” Kipote was anxious to hear what was making this usually composed man so excited. He had never seen him like this.

                “My boy, you aren’t boara or ioba! You are trioza! Like me! As far as I know, we are the only ones left in all of Fazad! We are an extremely rare breed. Our number is dwindling, but we were once as common as the other two.”

                Trioza?” Kipote asked incredulously. “Smoke, I never knew there were any others!!”

                “Yes, why do you think I never showed any signs of water or fire abilites?” Kipote had always wondered about that. “No! Our powers instead lie in the fantastic mysteries of flora. Why do you think I live in this banda forest? Why do you think my entire house is made of banda wood! I created this house myself you know.”

                “Flora? You mean plants?” Kipote asked. That was disappointing. “What good does that do?”

                “Kipote, you will soon come to realize that you have been extremely blessed. You will be unique from almost everyone else you meet, and will be able to surprise people with your abilities. I’ll teach you things you never dreamed were possible. I can’t believe this, I’m so happy I have someone to pass my knowledge onto!”

                For some reason, the young man was unable to share Boatax’s immense excitement. He took a towel to dry his body off, put his shirt back on, thanked Boatax, and left the ceremonial room.

 

Chapter Three

 

                “What did the Council decide to name them?” King Faokan asked Jailyn, beaming down at his newborn sons, while inwardly cursing her for having three. He knew it wasn’t her fault, but for some reason, he still blamed her in a small way.

                “This one is Duntid,” she said, holding up the largest one. He looked slightly plump, as if he had somehow gotten the better deal in the womb. Duntid clapped his hands as she put him down, and picked up one that was crying most annoyingly. “This is Wipnid. And over here…” Jailyn pointed in the direction of the sleeping baby “Is Cooplid.”

                “Duntid, Wipnid, and Cooplid. Smoke, what was the Council thinking?”

                “Apparently, they believed that these names would appeal to the Fazadi people. You’re so hard on them, Faokan. They’re just doing their jobs, like you. I wish you would give an attempt to at least pretend you don’t hate all the Councilors personally.”

                “They certainly don’t try to hide their contempt of me!” barked the King, making Wipnid wail louder. Jailyn’s eyebrows raised, and he took the hint. “Sorry,” he murmurmed, and retreated to a softer tone, “It’s just that they purposely make my life so difficult. You have no idea, Jailyn.”

                “If there is anyone who understands, it’s me, Faokan. I see what you go through every day, and I’m proud of you for it. You’re father would be proud too, if he could see how far you’ve brought Fazad during your reign.”

                There were a few moments of silence, as Faokan stared down at his new children. All he saw when he looked at them was another big political catastrophe. Why was he unable to feel any love for them? The question only made him feel worse. The tension in his head was getting almost unbearable.

                “I love you Jailyn, and congratulations. All of Fazad is celebrating with us today. I will see you at the banquet tonight, but for now, I need to lie down again.” Jailyn waved goodbye, and he stepped out of the hospice just as Cooplid woke up and began to cry hysterically along with Wipnid. Duntid gave a big grin to see his brothers so miserable, and clapped his pudgy little hands again.  

 

? ? ?

 

                Slowly and painfully, Surbano opened his eyes, and was surprised to see nothing. At first, he suspected that he had been blinded somehow, and his heart gave a nervous jump in his chest. Would it be permanent? Would he never be able to see Wyba’s beautiful face ever again? How would he get by in life? Boatax would have no use for him anymore! He’d be cast out on the streets of some city, to fend for himself!

                Suddenly, there was a creaking of a door opening somewhere and a brief stripe of light fell across his body, before the door shut again with a boom, and a light but echoey pitter-patter of footsteps retreated away from his location. He gave a sigh of relief. He wasn’t blind after all. He felt kind of ridiculous now for worrying so much.

                His heart jumped into his chest again, when his brain registered what he had just seen in that short glimpse. He was completely unclothed, except for a pair of tattered white shorts, and there had been red scratches and scrapes all over his body. Even more horrifying was the fact that he was chained to a wall in some sort of prison cell, shackles around his wrists and ankles. He was in a lot of pain, and was just beginning to realize the full extent of it.

                Where am I? Why can’t I remember anything? Surbano thought back to the most recent memory he could.

                He was hunting for the still-liquid box. All five of them were. He was climbing a tree… no after that… he stepped into a pond, and searched underneath all the rocks that lined the bottom, using ioba to evaporate the water and then to replenish it again when he had finished. Disappointed that he still hadn’t found it, he came back onto dry land, when he heard a crackle of banda leaves behind him. Someone was approaching.

                One of my friends, to brag that they found it first, he thought as he spun around. Instead of Razzi or Wyba, standing there smirking at him, it was two kaustices, salivating and ready to pounce. Giving a startled yelp, Surbano tried to send a torrent of icy water at them, but he was too late. They pounced, landing on top of him, and trying, it seemed, to tear all the skin off his body. He tried to fend them off, punching and kicking. Using ioba would have been impossible in this situation - not enough time to prepare an attack. And he quickly realized they were too strong to try to fight off with just his fists. He fell to the ground and lay still, hoping they would stop once they noticed he had given up. To his relief, they did stop after a short while. They eyed him carefully, and he closed his eyes, trying to muster the energy to use ioba. He opened them again, just in time to see one of the kaustices with a large rock in its sinewy hands. It was the last thing he could remember seeing. It must have knocked him unconscious with the rock - there was a lot of pain in the side of his head.

                Surbano, fastened to a wall, now found himself wondering why the kaustices had brought him to this dark place. They must be working for some human. And there was only one human Surbano knew of that used kaustices to do her bidding.

                Suddenly, it seemed like everything was light. Squinting through the painful surge of brightness, Surbano could just make out the large figure of Angarooka, a ball of extremely bright white fire hovering over her outstretched hand.

                “Good, you are awake. How are you?” she laughed wickedly.

                “What do you want with me, Might?” he said, shielding his eyes with a manacled hand and trying not to sound too disrespectful. If Boatax found out he had disrespected a Might, even after everything she had done to him, he would not be happy. “You didn’t need to send kaustices to get me here you know. I would have come if you had simply sent for me.”

                “Oh I doubt that, boy. The reason you are here is not one you are going to like.”

                “What is it?” Surbano groaned, fearing the worst.

                “I have recently sent your precious Boatax a message, informing him that I will be participating in the Cebaltan Games, and that I will be borrowing one of his Apprentices briefly, to help train my new team of competitors.”

                Surbano gasped. Might Angarooka had never participated in the Games before, nor had she ever trained any Apprentices. What was she up to?

                “You know all the methods that Boatax’s uses to train you, being the Apprentice that’s been with him for the longest time. You are going to help me train my new Apprentices, quickly before the Games which are only a few weeks away.”

                Surbano couldn’t believe what he was hearing. And he did not want to help this woman. It would be betraying his own friends to do so. But he was sure that she would torture him until he agreed to help. To save himself the misery, he did the inevitable.

                “I will help you, Might, but I’m afraid that training takes a long time. You cannot simply give them boosts. You must wait until they earn…”

                “I will decide when and how I give them boosts, not you,” she interrupted. “Your job is to help them learn everything they need to know for the Games. I do not have it in me to teach anyone anything.”

                “Well, I will do my best, Might, but I fear I will only be able to help those who possess access to ioba. Boara is completely foreign to me.” Surbano regretted saying this as soon as it was out of his mouth. Smoke, I am an absolute moron!

                Angarooka scowled. “I didn’t think of that. Looks like we’ll be needing a little more help, doesn’t it? Your friend Razzi perhaps? Or maybe Olsda?” Surbano’s heart sank. This is exactly what he had feared. His words had now gotten one of his friends in the same mess that he was in. He would have punched himself for his stupidity if there weren’t chains holding him back.

                Angarooka gave a malicious grin, as if she could tell what he was thinking, before shouting “GOLSGOOD!!!”

                Almost instantaneously, a tiny balding man poked his head into the door of the cell.

                “Yes, might?”

                Surbano would have laughed had the circumstances been different. Golsgood looked as if his fear was about to make him pop.

                “Would you run and bring my head kaustice a message?” she commanded.

                “What do you need with ketchup?”

                “Oh, for the love of… I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS, GOLSGOOD!” her face turned bright red with fury.

                “I’m sorry to have offended your family,” Golsgood panicked. “I didn’t realize what the consequences would be…”

                “SMOKE, GOLSGOOD! STOP TALKING AND LISTEN TO ME!!!” she roared. It must have been a little bit too loud, because she began to cough and wheeze violently. The whole time, Golsgood apologized again and again, begging for mercy. The scene was almost too much for Surbano.

                Finally, when Angarooka had recovered, she looked up at Golsgood, and spoke very softly.

                “You will listen to me Golsgood. Tell my head kaustice to send five of his army back to Boatax’s cabin, and bring me either Razzi or Olsda, either one will do. Tell him that I’m not going to deliver them there this time, they’ll have to make the journey on foot. I’m too busy to be bothered with that. Tell them I expect them to be back here in a couple days with their victim anyway, I don’t care how impossible it is. They’re kaustices - they can run fast. Anyway, tell him all that, Golsgood.”

                “Understood, Might. You want me to find your mother who is vacationing in Cuacuo, diagnose her with hippopatomitis, give her The Golden Elixir of Pancreas, and make sure she gets plenty of rest. Anything else?”

                “BLAST IT GOLSGOOD!” she screamed again. Golsgood leapt backwards in fear. She whipped out a piece of paper and a black quill pen, and began scribbling a note on it. She then thrust the note into the servant’s hands. “I WANT YOU TO TAKE THIS NOTE TO THE HEAD KAUSTICE! THEN I WANT YOU TO LEAVE, AND NEVER COME BACK! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD!?!?”

                “Yes, might,” Golsgood looked surprised, sad, and relieved all at the same time.

                “I don’t ever want to see your scrawny neck again, do you hear me?” she warned. “Or I will see to it personally that you suffer for the rest of your miserable life.”

                “Yes, might,” Golsgood said, before escaping out the door. Angarooka turned to face Surbano again, smiling. “One of your friends will be here shortly to help you out. And they’ll be lucky if they look as good as you when the kaustices are through with them. People who wield boara are often more troublesome and stubborn, two things the kaustices won’t appreciate.”

                Might Angarooka laughed hoarsely on her way out, before going into another horrible coughing fit. Surbano felt tears of rage materializing in the corners of his eyes, and knew that this wasn’t going to be a pleasant few weeks. Nor would it be pleasant to face his friends after they found out he aided an opposing team. Not that he had much choice in the matter.

                He hoped the kaustices didn’t take Olsda. He didn’t want her getting hurt. He didn’t want Razzi getting hurt either. Smoke, why did he have to say anything?

 

 
 

©Brendon Adam Shapiro. All rights reserved!

DateNameComment 
11 Apr 2006:-) Kaeli Grotz
I’m sure when a queen gives birth, there are enough people around for at least one person would remember which one came out first. Haha, and try telling the elder twins I know that their three minute head start doesn’t count! But small matter, a progressive king deciding to hold elections works just as well.

And I don’t mean anything bad by American, there are just some words or expressions that aren’t quite English from England. >_< It’s hard to describe, I’ll point it out if I notice it when I’m next reading.

1 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Okay, that would be great! Thanks."
4 Jun 2006:-) ´Disco´ Vic Alfieri
Howdy, and welcome to my commentary on your story, Fazad...

I came here from Elizabeth Wilcox's page having seen your comments there, and decided to see what all the fuss was with Fazad...and now I know!!

What a brilliant tale you've woven! It's at once captivating and funny, and with good lead ins and ending sentences it leaves the reading wanting more and makes them want to continue travelling along through the world of Fazad.

As for the story itself, there were a couple of hiccups I noticed as i read, but nothing too gritty, and i don't wanna nitpick right now, so I'll just say my editorial mind had little to worry about when reading through your marvellous tale. In other words, no glaring errors.

The real show stealers were Golsgood and his mistress Angarooka, but Golsgood was a brilliant bit of comic relief.

And the intrigue was there in spades, well not literally, but metaphorically speaking. You managed to hold the interest of at least this reader with the large helping of Fazad pie you serve up here, and coupled with the multi-faceted storyline I do believe you could send this off to a publisher and they'd eat it up immediately, then they'd offer you a book deal...at least I would were I a publisher...

Anyway, enough praise for you for one day, I'm off to have a look at the arty part of your world, and then to check up on my own elfwoodian shelf...

Rest assured that I will be back this way to continue the journey with Surbano, Kipote, Razzi and co, shortly.

3 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Woah! Thanks! Thanks a lot!!! Please do stop by again!

I'm really pleasantly surprised that you really found the story to be so excellent after only reading Part A. If you like it now, I think it improves as it goes, so I really hope you do continue reading!! I do realize that there are errors that need to be fixed, and I have already begun rewriting the prologue.

Yes, Golsgood and Angarooka are two of my favorite creations. And it's wonderful to hear you call this publishable. It is my dream... so maybe once I'm all done writing and rewriting this mess of a story, I'll submit it and see what happens. Thanks so much for the very encouraging comment, much appreciated!!"
26 Jun 2006:-) Désirée Ruth Dippenaar
o.O *stunned* This is really really good! I love your characters (especially Golsgood - hahaha), you have developed all of them really well! It's very interesting this far and at the end it just leaves me wondering what will happen next...

Fazad seems like a very interesting place, and it's good how you showed its difference to this world with the two suns instead of one. You also seem to have quite a thorough idea of the government system etc. - something I'm too lazy to do! Hehe...

Well, I shouldn't linger but move on to Part B! *disapparates*

1 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Yay, thanks so much! I'm really glad you're enjoying Fazad so far, and I hope you stick it out until the end! Yeah, the government system is one thing I'm quite proud of - I wish I went as in depth with developing the culture and the history and so on. Thanks again!"
1 Aug 2006:-) Dan R. Morgan
I'm afraid this comment's going to be predominantly a criticism. So brace yourself.

As far as the actual writing goes, it was decent. There's a few things I noticed though:

- It's usually not a good idea to have the word used more than once in a paragraph. You used 'tiny' to describe the one apprentice's mouth three of four times consecutively. If it were me writing, I'd completely rewrite that section, but another way to fix it would to at least use other words for tiny -- synonyms.

- Another suggestion that may improve you're writing would be to try to compact it. Get more across using less paper. It's hard but once you get it down it sounds really good.

*As I started reading, I became daunted at what I thought would be a long read, but, for reasons I'm not sure I understand, it seemed to find a way to flow rather smoothly. That and the larger font.

As for the actual story:

- I felt some characters did not recieve enough of an introduction before events started happening to them and I wasn't able to sympathize with them. However, i thought the evil lady Might, the bald moron and Boatax were good characters and introduced effectively (although everytime i read Boatax, i see botox). I'm not sure whether or not golsgood's character is too much, too much of a moron. If you're just emphasizing that he's a moron then i don't think you need all of his antics. An interesting plot twist might be to have him purposefullly being overly retarded to fool the evil Might lady into releasing him, and then bring him back in to help the imprisoned magic people.

- Another concept you might benefit from is just telling the front-story. Front-story is the pure action and the present thoughts of the characters without any background information. Like how Razzi calls Kipote "kid" -- don't literally explain why he calls him kid, do it subtlely. Maybe establish beforehand that they are virtually the same age and then have Kipote think "I hate it when he calls me that" or something. Get the reader to ask questions. When the reader has questions he/she will read on to try and answer them.

I hope you don't take these criticisms the wrong way. I think with a little work this could be a promising story -- I haven't read anything like it before. How long have you been writing?

1 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Hey Dan, thanks for coming over! Awesome comment - it's great to have honest criticism. A lot of your advice is different than what other people have said which is great, so I'll be sure to use that! Also, I think you'll find the writing does get significantly better as it goes, since I have definitely improved as a writer since the beginning of the series. Fazad was definitely a big growing process for me.

You aren't the first to have told me that it went a lot faster than you expected. I think that's probably a good thing, and I think most of it is due to the fact that a lot of it is dialogue, which usually reads fairly quickly. Also, I don't use THAT much description, which is often something that takes a while to get through.

I do definitely need to go back through the beginning and introduce the characters better so that you are able to sympathize earlier. I'm glad you liked some of the characters though - you did mention probably the three that have gotten a lot of good feedback. The reason I'm hesitant to alter Golsgood is that he seems to be one of the things people are enjoying most about this story, but I am considering toning him down a bit.

You're advice about telling the "front-story" is an excellent suggestion, thank you so much!! I will definitely think about that as I revise this.

I'm glad you find the story different, that was one of my major goals - to write a fantasy that isn't so much like every other fantasy. I've been writing most of my life, but this is really my first major project. Thanks again for reading Dan, hope to see you again! I'll certainly return to your page soon!"
21 Aug 2006:-) John L. C. Ryan
Saw your work recommended by Brie and decided to give it a look. To be honest, I really enjoyed it!

Your characters were good and relatively believable. The world was set up quite nicely (intro to magic - both how it works and what structure there is in terms of magicians etc, politics, "monsters" and so forth) and we got a hint of the story to come...

I will definately read the rest of what you have written. Well done.

3 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Excellent, thanks for stopping by! I'll have to thank Brie for the recommendation.

Well, I'm thrilled that you like the beginning, because it is coincidentally the part I'm least happy with at the moment. (Probably because my writing has - in my opinion - developed greatly over the year that I've been writing this) So if you weren't turned away by the beginning, I'm pretty sure you'll continue to like it! Thanks again for reading and commenting!"
17 Sep 200645 Anonymous
I loved the story! even with poor descriptions of some characters(no offence) you can deffenetly tell what they look like just by the way they speak and act...by the by, does Angarooka ware a lot of red? Because that's how I kind of imagined her. Anyway awesome story!!!

2 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Hey, thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it! I do realize some of my descriptions aren't that great, and I do plan on majorly fixing that the second time around. At least you got some idea of them any through the dialogue - I was hoping that would happen. And yeah, Angarooka probably does wear a lot of red, come to think of it. Thanks again for reading!"
12 Nov 2006:-) Heidi Hecht
I'm liking it so far. That Might, Angarooka, is probably going to make my Top Ten list of feminine villains. She's really full of herself, isn't she?

1 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Well, thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed the first part, and especially Angarooka! She definitely sits in there between Cruella Deville and Professor Umbridge. 2"
10 Mar 200745 Captain Faramir
Hello! Since others have given you all the detailed word-by-word constructive criticism that I usually offer, I shall refrain and instead offer my encouragement. While I agree that your writing style could be a bit more descriptive and sophisticated, you've done a great job of creating an interesting and fairly unique world. Some stories just scream "Cliche!" but yours doesn't, and that's good. Your characters certainly are amusing. +) Keep writing! The more you write, the more you improve, and the more you improve, the more you'll be able to show others the magic of words and the world of Story...

:-) Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Hey! Thanks for reading!! (Over two months ago - wow I really need to reply to these sooner, haha) I'm really really glad you find this story to not be cliche, and I hope that as I edit I can make the style a bit more mature. (I wrote this beginning two years ago now, and hopefully I've improved since then as a writer) I really appreciate it!"
28 Jun 2007:-) Amanda Nikese
I really like this story it's very engaging. At first I was intimidated by the length but the writing is beautiful, so I will be back to read more.

3 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Cool! I'm really glad you liked the beginning. I'm sometimes intimidated when a story is this long too, but most people seem to think that Fazad actually reads pretty fast. Probably because of how little description I use. Anyway, thanks for reading!"
2 Oct 2007:-) Brie 'The Cheese Girl' O'Reilly
Hmm, this seems different. For some reason, I remember more of a plot before the birth of the triplets and the kidnapping of Surbano. Maybe I'm just confused, but it has been a while since I read it. Well Done, Sir.

*The Cheese Girl*

3 Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "It's you! How've you been!!

Hmm... I don't think I've updated this on Elfwood (although I have revised it a bit since) but maybe I did and forgot..."
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