Document 23 out of 23 by Brendon Adam Shapiro.

SciFi and Fantasy Stories: Blue Light

A strange little story written entirely in dialogue - see what you make of it.

Main Category: [Horror]

Sub-categories: [Spaceships, Ships, Vessels, Transportation...] [Alien Encounters, Extraterrestrial] [/Alien Encounters, Extraterrestrial]


	Blue Light by Brendon A. Shapiro "Here, pull over at this gas station!" "No, dude, I know exactly where we are. Chill." "My girlfriend's going to kill me if I'm late again. Just stop here and ask, please!" "Shut up! Joe said that if we followed Route...” "I don't care what he said! We've been going the wrong direction for twenty minutes! C'mon man, pull over at this station." "Nah, it's too late. I passed it." "Oh come on! Here, pull off the road and turn around." "Where can I pull off?" "That little driveway on the left! Quick, over there." "Oh yeah, I see it. Wow, if you hadn't pointed it out, I never would have noticed it." "Don't miss it." "Don't worry dude! I can drive. Jeez, you're going to have like some kind of breakdown..." "What's that blue light?" "Huh?" "Weird - keep going down this driveway." "I thought you wanted me to turn around." "Don't you see that light? Through the trees?" "No." "Keep going." "Oh yeah! What is that?" "I don't know. It's so weird. Like some weird pulsating blue light from..." BAM "What the hell was that?" "I don't know, did something land on the car? Oh my god..." SCREEEEECH "STAY ON THE ROAD!" "Oh, holy..." "Give me the wheel!" CRUNCH "Crap." "Great dude. That was terrific." "I think we're stuck in this rut." "Are you serious? Try to back out." WHIRRRRRR "Nope, the car's stuck." "Try it again." WHIRRRRRR WHIRRRRRR "Yeah, um, no." "I'm driving next time, man. And we are NOT listening to Joe again. Let's get out and push." "Are you serious? Didn't you see that thing hit our car?" "I didn't really see it, no. Probably just a branch." "A slimy branch?" "Eww." "Yeah." "Well, what are we going to do - just sit in this car for the rest of our lives?" "Alright, we'll get out of the car. Do you have like a baseball bat or something in here?" "No, don't think so. Why?" "I don't know what that thing was, but it looked big and slimy. And look at the dent it left in your car." "Oh god! That's gonna be expensive." "And we still don't know what that weird blue light was." "What's the worst it could be?" "Ah, I don't know. You're right, let's get out of the car." CLUNK SLAM "I guess we have to get into the rut to push out the car." "There's no way we're getting this thing out of here." "I know. Want me to walk back to the main road and find some help?" "Wait, no, let's stay together." "What, did you stay up watching scary movies last night?" "It was big and slimy, man!" "Where the hell is that light coming from? C'mon, I'm going to go check it out." "What about the car?" "Leave it." "Do you have a flashlight in there? It's getting dark." "No! C'mon!" "Oh man, I don't like this." "Well next time stop at the gas station when I tell you to and this won't happen. Oh man, my girlfriend's going to kill me." "Hey, I think we're getting closer to the blue light." "Yeah, I think I can hear it! It's like a throbbing sound every time the light pulses." “Oh my god, what is that?” “Woah. I don’t know. I’ve never seen anything like it!” “That is huge.” “I know.” “Do you think it’s like a spaceship or something? ‘Cause that’s what it looks like.” “It’s so beautifully blue.” “I know. I’d never thought I’d see one of these.” "Dude?" "Hey, where did you go?" "This isn't funny, man." "Hey, I'm back." "Well it's about time. You had me worried." "Yeah, sorry about that dude." "It's alright. Where did you go though?" "I was a little hungry, so I went out looking for something to eat." "Did you find anything?" "Yeah, the pink creatures on this planet are really quite good." "Really? The pink ones?" “Yup. They were fun to hunt down too.” “How so?” “Well, the first one I killed instantly. I let the second one see me first though – he let out quite the shriek." “Hmm…” “Yeah.” “Now that you mention it, I'm pretty hungry too. I'll be right back."

Date	Name	Comment
16 Mar 2006	A. ´Kelsie´ Hurley	Loading... Hehehe... This was a good laugh. No criticisms for this one, it's great! I love the twist at the end, too. Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Woah... NO CRITICISMS?!?! That is insane. hugs you for making my day. I'm really glad you enjoyed this!! Thanks so much. "
31 Mar 2006	Kaeli Grotz	Loading... Very unusual and interesting. For the most part I liked the use of only dialogue, but in places I felt it detracted from the story rather than enhanced it. For example, the twist at the end, while clever, was just a little too unclear. I still thought it provided a fresh way of dealing with the old "people take wrong turn, aliens eat people" storyline though, so well done there. Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Yeah, maybe you're right. But the whole point of this story was to write it just using dialogue. There really isn't much to it beyond that. And I wanted the end to be vague, and you to be unsure. Different possibilities maybe. Anyway, thanks for the comment and for reading!!"
14 Apr 2006	Emma Kathryn McDonald	Loading... Good god this was funny! Lotsaluv, Em Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Oh wow! I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for dropping by! "
19 Apr 2006	Joseberg	Loading... Very interesting idea writing in only dialogue! And it works very well! Quite funny too. And nice touch with the aliens talking like the humans (slang) got me a bit confused at first, but i guess that was the point. Taught me never get out of the car when there's a strange pulsating blue light around... Keep up the good work and feel free to return the visit (very, very new here, haven't got any readers yet). Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "I'm glad you enjoyed it Josefin. Yes, it was supposed to confuse you at the end, and I wanted you to be unsure of what was going on. I'm glad you learned such an important lesson from my story. (lol) I'll definitely be by your page soon!"
9 May 2006	Jennifer Crowley	Loading... every once and a while I read a story that is mostly dialogue or all dialogue and I love them. It leaves a lot to the imagination, but done well it can be very entertaining. This one is both. My only criticism is that during the first stretch, I loose track of who is talking. I'm not really sure if that is important or not, but if you could every once and a while have one person say the other person's name, we could know who is talking. But that is just me REALLY nitpicking... you could keep it the way it is and I would be ok. And I think the ending works. I had to re-read the last two bits another time, because after the first revelation I had to re-read it to marvel at the transition, and how well it was done. I also like the sound effects. Finally, I'm so happy that you are putting more humor up! I'm in the same opinion that there needs to be more humor (I came to this conclusion recently after reading so many of the stories and commenting, only to realize that they are almost all serious!) Humor is an artform that takes more skill than even sorrow, at least for me. Continue to visit! Jen Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Wow, thanks a lot Jennifer! I'm glad you enjoyed this! As for the criticism, I figured that it wasn't really important which guy was which, and so it didn't matter if you lost track. They're both just your generic male teenagers, lol. And I definitely agree with you about humor!! It's underappreciated I feel, and definitely underrepresented on Elfwood."
19 Jun 2006	Kayla	Loading... Gobble Gobble. Those little pink things were good. I think I'm going to have a few more. Oh, sorry if that confused you, I was talking about my candy. Seriously, I'm not a carnivor. Really. I liked this story. So typical of guys. They never seem to come to a smart conclusion! Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "I'm glad you enjoyed it! And yes, I am a bit confused about the pink things, but I'll let it pass. "
7 Aug 2006	Theresa Cargill	Loading... I like it!!!! Never read a story done in only dialogue and sound effects but i liked it, It let my imagination run a little wild but hay thats a good thind!! Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Thanks so much! I'm glad I could give your imagination a boost! That's what this is all about after all. "
7 Sep 2006	Kim Schoonover (Darth Maul´s scary sister)	Loading... It isn't all dialogue, though... O_o? Why lie? Seriously, why? Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Question mark??"
28 Jun 2007	Amanda Nikese	Loading... I liked the switch in perspective at the end there. Very original story I'm surprised it didn't get mod's choice. Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Thanks so much! I'm glad you found it original! And yeah... I still haven't earned a mod's choice for any of my stories, which makes me sad. One day maybe... one day..."
13 Aug 2007	James P-W	Loading... I didn't the perspective change until I read it through a second time...maybe us asterisks or something to separate it? I liked how the aliens used "dude" (even though it confused me for a second time) because then it adds to the idea of “it’s all in the perspective”---in many ways, the aliens are just like the two teenage boys, simply out looking for a snack : ) I would never have written a story like this just because I love descripting (and overdescripting) things…but your idea here works – that of using only dialogue and sound effects. Props. Brendon Adam Shapiro replies: "Well, thanks, I'm glad you liked it! It's kind of stretch for me too, I wouldn't normally write something like this but I thought I'd give it a try anyway, and it was fun to write! Quick too, actually! I wrote it in one evening. Oh, and I intended the switch in perspectives to be kind of confusing and unclear, possibly taking the reader a moment to realize what happened. Thanks so much for reading, I really appreciate it!"
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'Blue Light'

SciFi and Fantasy Stories: Blue Light