SciFi and Fantasy Stories
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'Desert Rose - Chapter III'


 
 

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Click For MoreDocument 7 out of 37 by Liz Verde.

SciFi and Fantasy Stories: Desert Rose - Chapter III

The Prophecy


The Anjinu tribe learns a little bit more about their history, and their potential future, while things in the desert become a little more dangerous. Etain continues learning her healing talents.

Edited apostrophe errors: August 2008: Going back through this very old chapter, it was really hard not to just scrap the original and re-write the entire thing but I promised my readers I would get the next chapter out, so I resisted. Please, ignore the horrible grammar and sentence structure in this chapter, it's the oldest one to date. I promise that chapter four is better.

    Main Category: [High Fantasy]
    Sub-categories: [Romance, Emotion] [Celtic]

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Chapter Three
Prophecy

"Etain, Etain, wake up! The seer has had a vision!" was the morning wake-up that Etain received, followed by a vigorous shaking when she didn't move.

"Wha ..?" Etain drowsily popped her head out from under the covers.

"Hurry up lazy bones!" Rhiannon said while tossing a sutah over her shoulder at Etain, followed by a pilah and taren.

Etain groaned and wriggled into the pants as best she could under the covers. Looking around the tent, she saw that she and Rhiannon were the last ones left. Alori, Timo, and Setana had already left for the communal tent.

Stepping out, Etain looked around to find the entire camp deserted. Silent. This had to be a major prophecy if the entire tribe had been called out. Even the animals were subdued, hiding in the minute shade offered by the tents; as if they, too, knew something important had occurred. She and Rhiannon rushed past the tribe campfire and drying racks to the communal tent, which was set up right beside the council's tent.

They slipped inside and quickly found the seats that Alori had saved for them. Setana picked up Etain's hand in hers when she sat down, and gave an excited squeeze as she smiled at her. This was the first communal meeting Setana was old enough to attend. Etain craned her neck, rolling forward onto her crossed legs to try and see the far end of the tent where the tribal council and Marla the Seer sat. Marla's small, heavyset frame was situated between two of the council's oldest members. Her lined face and cataract-clouded eyes held a glow of excitement that illuminated her entire body.

When everyone was seated and the din slowly began to fade, Halek spoke. "Marla has seen a wonderful vision of our ancient city of Capel Celyn being restored to us!" Halek raised his hands in a triumphant gesture as the older generations began to cheer.

Etain looked about in confusion, unsure as to the full implications of that statement. Many of the faces around her echoed that sentiment, particularly the younger generations. Etain knew of the old city but not much else. This was the first she had heard it mentioned in over ten years. Etain suspected that it was a sore subject for many of the older generation but had no idea as to why. If Capel Celyn was such a great place, why did they no longer live there?

Marla scanned across the crowd of jubilant faces, waiting until the noise died down before she spoke. Her raspy voice drifted over their heads like a butterfly's erratic flight. She held her audience enraptured as her story unfolded.

"Long ago there was said to be the most beautiful Queen in all the land. She ruled with a just and firm hand, her lover at her side. The people of Capel Celyn revered and loved her. Everyone thought the Gods blessed their reign and that nothing could stand in their way. They did not suspect that the King of the Sidhe, Midir, was becoming increasingly jealous of the Queen's lover, who had such a beautiful wife by his side. When King Midir could stand his jealousy no longer, he sent one of his subjects to the Queen's lover as a 'gift'." Few dared even to cough during Marla's recounting, afraid that she might stop. The utter silence in the tent was only broken by the sound of her crackling voice.

"But it was not to be so, for the sĦdhe slowly poisoned the Queen's lover's thoughts with greed and hate; why should she rule the kingdom and leave nothing for him or his sons? So he took it upon himself to murder the Queen and claim the throne with the aid of his attendant." Several gasps whispered out into the tent and were absorbed by the heavy air. Etain could feel her mouth hanging open in shock at such treachery within a tribe. As Marla continued, Etain leaned forward, hanging on her every word.

"The Gods, seeing what was done, became angered. They struck down the false King where he stood and banished his five sons to the winds, concealing Capel Celyn from them and their descendants until such a time as the three who were born under the Aldebaran star could lead them back to their home."

"Who are to be the three people to lead us?" someone questioned in the silence.

"Each of the three factions that had a hand in the scattering of our people must atone. The sĦdhe, a descendant from the kings of old, and the Gods."

At this news a groan came from some of the more skeptical members of the tribe. Mercy shot to her feet and Etain could hear her mother gasp and watched her try to tug her back down to her seat.

"If we're dependant upon the Mercy of the Gods and that of Midir then we're doomed, for the Gods have forsaken us!" And with that, she left the tent.

Setana, seeing the look on William's face, turned to Etain and whispered; "Boy is she ever going to get it when her parents catch up to her!"

Etain nodded, hoping that Mercy, who was incredibly misnamed, had the wisdom to go out for a long ride to allow her father time to cool off.

Etain was walking back to the tent when Laepa and her brothers, Kelten and Quintin, joined her. Their tent was set up just beyond Etain's, so they chatted as they walked.

"I've heard some of the women talking about Capel Celyn. They say it's a huge city at the base of a stone castle where the Queen ruled," Laepa chatted.

"Well, I don't see how knowing that we will go back is helping us any. She didn't exactly say when, now did she," Kelten pointed out, his face twisted into a sneer.

"Oh, quit being so sour," Quintin chided. "It's not as if you could do any better."

"It would have helped if she had known when, or who those three would be," Etain admitted.

"Don't you think it odd that a queen ruled?" Laepa asked while flicking a piece of her black hair over her shoulder.

"Quit being such a nit, Leep," Kelten lashed out.

"Don't call me that!" Laepa turned to her brother with fire in her eyes, ready to do battle.

"Ignore him, he's sore at a girl right now. And you," Quintin cuffed his younger brother on the back of the head, "smarten up."

"When are the dance trials being held?" Etain changed the subject, hoping to cool tempers and relieve the tension.

"I believe it's at the end of the week because we still have all of the preparations to do."

Etain waved goodbye as she entered her tent. Taking off her taren and folding it away into her sack, she told Rhiannon, "Well, I'm off to the healer's tent. I'll see you in a bit."

When Etain had left, Rhiannon went out to the square where the women were already bustling about getting food ready for the Samhain celebration. Women were stringing taurin carcasses and setting up wooden racks to hang quello. Along with the excited chatter of the upcoming festival, Rhiannon could also make out scattered conversations about Capel Celyn and the prophecy. She, too, wondered about when its outcome would be, as she slipped amongst the ranks of those who were plucking the birds and immersed herself in her work.


* * * * *


Already, Etain's head was beginning to ache with all the information it was trying to contain. She had only been there for two hours, they had already covered a quarter of the herbs, and plants she needed to know, along with remedies for specific ailments. At the moment, Etain was enjoying her five minutes of peace before she had to undergo the second of her trials. She would have to complete two more trials before she earned her final healers bracelet.

When they were ready, Etain was called to sit in front of two women.

"Now, you remember how we told you of the healing light inside everyone? Each person's light shines and reflects what they will it to. This means that when you can focus and see the light of a person, you can find out what is wrong - and heal it." She indicated the woman sitting next to her. "Elleywen came to me this morning with a problem. I need you to find it and fix it."

Etain's nervous gaze flickered from Princess Delane to Elleywen. When Princess Delane nodded, Etain closed her eyes, emptying her mind. She could feel the fire that was her life and spirit expanding to fill her entire body until her skin grew translucent and she began to glow with its light. When she opened her eyes the tent was gone, and all she saw before her were the twin fires of Delane and Elleywen.

Upon closer inspection, she could see there was a dark mark upon Elleywen's fire that was slowly quenching the light and heat from the rest of her. If left unchecked, it would consume her until there was nothing left. Etain looked down and watched while a piece of her own fire condensed into a ball in her palm and slowly turned green. She placed her hand over the dark mark, forcing the ball of green fire to seep through the skin towards its target. When it first touched the darkness it began to sputter and go out. Etain redoubled her efforts until she could see the flame of Elleywen's spirit beginning to expand and illuminate the darkness.

Etain felt a weight on her wrist and opened her eyes to find another bracelet on her arm. Upon closer inspection, she noticed that this one had two fig leaves and a ball of fire engraved on it. She had passed her first real test.

Elleywen got up and, as she passed behind Etain on her way to exit the tent, she laid her hand on Etain's shoulder and gave a squeeze of gratitude. When Etain looked into Delane's face, she saw a smile curving her lips and a light in her eyes that had been dormant for a long time.

"You'd best go and rest for a bit to restore yourself," Delane advised before she, too, got to her feet and exited in Elleywen's wake.

Back at the tent, Etain shed her sutah for a riding shirt, disregarding Delane's advice. As soon as it was on, Oisin poked his head out from amongst her blankets to give her a questioning look. Covering her mouth she laughed, shoulders shaking in mirth. Oisin's fur on the left side of his face was flattened forward so it poked out past his nose and the fur on the other side stuck out every which way.

Giving an affronted snort, he got up and trotted to the tent flap where he stopped and turned to her as if to say, "you've had your fun, now can we go?" There were many times such as this that Etain would have given almost anything to be able to hear her dog's thoughts.

Snatching up Rhiannon's burnoose - she had no idea where her own was - and wrapping it around her face, she followed Oisin out of the tent. Iceni had gone wandering off somewhere since his oat bucket was too empty to tempt him to stay. Etain whistled and waited until she heard pounding hoofbeats and Iceni skidded to a halt in front of her, showering her with sand. Giving him a glare as she passed, she swung up and headed out of camp. She didn't want to contemplate the chaos he'd probably left in his wake as he'd gone charging through the camp. He was a very sweet horse and one of the easiest to ride but he didn't have any idea of his size.

As she passed the hakkau corral on her way out into the desert, she paused, a frown darkening her face. The giant lizard-like pack animals were all huddled together at the near side of the fence, and occasionally she could hear one of the younger ones bawl. They sounded much like a noisy heard of cattle in need of milking.

Thinking about cows made Etain's mouth water. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had milk. It was too hard to keep a herd of cows, even a small one, since they were always traveling. That, and the fact that cows required too much water to make it realistic to keep them in the desert. Etain had to content herself with the thought that the next time they traveled to the forest they would be able to trade for some milk with the Obikawa tribe. They spent most of the year in the forests and so had a stead enough water supply for the cattle they kept.

The cattle hides were also wonderful for boots and shoes. They were much more flexible than the taurin hides they used for their tents. Etain remembered the year they decided not to travel north but headed west to meet up with the Hitana tribe for a few weeks. Her feet had grown another inch and her shoes no longer fit. They had long since used up the last of the cattle hide they'd bought, so Alori used an extra scrap of taurin hide to make her boots. Once the leather had dried, it was so stiff that Etain's feet were sore with blisters for weeks.

Now that she was out past the hakkau corral, the desert spread out uninterrupted before her like a vast golden blanket. Turning Iceni west, she kneed him into a canter and looked about for anything she could gather for dinner that night.

She had just found a flowering cactus plant when she happened to look up. The sight that met her eyes had her heart going cold. The sky, which had been clear before, was now a muddy gold on the horizon. It could only mean one thing; sand storm.

She raced back to Iceni, heart pounding as she vaulted onto his back. It took little urging to get him up to a gallop. Oisin bounded along behind them, his ears flat against his head in worry.

The vagrant wind caught at her clothes, tiny fingers plucking playfully. But once the storm caught up, the wind would no longer be playful. It would turn into a raging inferno, taking fistfuls of sand and using them to shred everything within sight.

She could see the dark speck on the horizon that was the camp and chanced a glance behind her, causing her to cry out. The sky had turned a purple-black and the edge of the storm was fast on Iceni's heels. She urged Iceni on as foam spouted from his mouth, his hooves pounding the sands.

When she was near enough to camp, she could hear the bell warning of the impending storm. People were rushing around, grabbing clothes on the racks and securing tent fastenings.

Etain hurried to the communal tent, which, in times of extreme weather, also served as a temporary stable. The horses inside were already restless, shifting their weight and throwing their heads about. She handed off Iceni's reins before racing toward her tent. The servants of the horse would look after him. They had a special talent with animals and so they stayed in the communal tent to keep the animals calm throughout the storm.

Back at the tent, the wind was already picking up. Smaller grains of sand were blasted through the air, stinging eyes and skin. Timo was out checking the tent fastenings, his cheeks already read from the abrasions.

When the tent was secure they both ducked inside, drawing their first clear deep breath of air. Alori was bustling about the tent worriedly a scrap of cloth mangled in her clenched fists.

"The Foster girl went out an hour ago and hasn't returned yet." She turned stricken eyes on Etain and Rhiannon. "Her father went out to look for her when the warning bell sounded."

Rhiannon gently pulled the cloth from her mother's fingers and replaced it with a hot cup of coffee. "Let us hope that the storm doesn't reach out to where they are; Eoniah protect them." Seeing her mother's indisposition, Rhiannon directed the rest of them to tasks to occupy their time.

Etain had just pulled out a baby blanket she had been working on for Elleywen's son when the first huge blast of wind hit the tent. Everyone paused, straining to hear any sounds over the howling of the wind. Setana gave up trying to weave reeds into a basket and instead buried her pale face in her mother's lap and closed her eyes. Etain wished she could join her. Now that the adrenalin of the escape had worn off, she was feeling rather tired and achy.

The storm lasted the duration of the morning and most of the afternoon before dying down. Etain was going stir crazy, and everyone's ears were ringing by the time they stepped out of the tent.

Setana rushed off to find out how Suki and her family fared while the rest of them went to the center of the camp to find out the extent of the damages.

Most of the tents were still intact, with only one or two needing minor repairs. One of the older hakkau had died. It panicked in the middle of the storm and charged out from the protective circle to be consumed by the storm. The greatest loss had been the Foster child. They found her body a twenty-minute ride outside of camp. Half buried, the clothes were shredded and the skin torn. There was no sign of her horse. Her father had ridden back into camp after the storm passed, unharmed. They held the death ceremony the next day at sundown.

The Foster family had spent the night with the body to deter any would be scavengers. The body couldn't be moved until they performed the death ceremony or the spirit would be unable to pass on and remain forever trapped.

It was a somber gathering the next day as the sun sank below the dunes. A priest stood by the girl's body, face bowed as he recited the rites. The Fosters stood in a semi-circle opposite the priest. Her mother knelt at her daughter's side, hands reflexively clenching in the sand, as if seeking purchase in her fractured world as a thin, pitiful keen rose from her throat.

Etain could barely stand to witness their grief, tears coursed down her cheeks and sobs tore from her throat. That little girl had been all her parents had left; when would the deaths cease?

She was almost relieved when the air shimmered and a man with black hair and a well-trimmed goatee appeared beside the body, taking her focus off the grief stricken family.

As one, the tribe knelt and touched their foreheads to the sand. Tchekichaun acknowledged their gesture and bent, scooping the body up in his arms. With the solid body in front of him, Etain could now see that he wasn't entirely solid. He was wispy and ethereal; her hand would feel nothing but air if she were to touch him.

With a nod to everyone, he turned and began walking into the fading sun. As he disappeared into sunset, Etain thought she saw the faint outline of a black-haired child walking beside him, her tiny hand enveloped in his.

 
 

DateNameComment 
2 May 2007:-) Linda M. Billson
Aw, now that’s sad. 8 Poor little thing. Glad Etain made it back, though. Sand storms frighten me. I haven’t even been NEAR one, and I still don’t like them. Yeah, the thought of having all of your skin stripped off your body while you are still alive is a frightening one

That was a brilliantly added tidbit, about the Queen and the ancient city. Well written. I liked how the older people were all excited, and the younger ones were dumbfounded. I imagined a lot of blank looks. ^.^ Heh heh, thanks. I’ve changed/added a bit since this was last put up, so it runs a little smoother (hopefully)

So, who’s the descendant of the royal line? Who’s the descendant of the faeries? Who’s the descendant of the GODS??? If I told you that, then I’d have to ..... do magic tricks on you!

I know, I know...read on. 1 Will do. Can’t stop. Must read.v *Waves as Linda disappears into the distance* good luck!
8 May 2007:-) Amanda Nikese
I too liked the image at the end, that they can actually see the Gods (or angel of death or whatever) is interesting. I was expecting the idea that the spirit to be trapped to be just a superstitious belief. What I like best about this story is the way you do dialogue, it’s very believable. The description of the coming of the sand storm reminded me of a story of my own,(Golden), which starts off with a sand storm approaching a desert village. Great work! I always struggle with my dialogue. To me, it never seems to fit and seem natural. Thank you for coming to read some more *hands over cookies* well, I think I’ll just have to come over and read Golden now ^_^Missing:[/color]
28 Jan 2008:-) Glo 'the Bug' Bowden
Ohhh...I LOVE that they can actually see Tchekichaun! What an incredible world you’ve created. How sad. The death scene really tugged at my heartstrings! How horrible to lose a child that way. how horrible to die that way!

Hmm.../Princess/ Delane? --sounds royal to me. 10

As to the fairies and Gods, well, I’ll just have to see. 2

:-) Liz Verde replies: "^_^ That’s my favorite moment in that chapter. I think when I re-write this I’m going to embelish it more because it’s such a poigniant part in the chapter for developing more of the culture.

Yes, I must work more on encorporating "
22 Jun 2008:-) B. Layne Weaver
Heya, Liz! How are you? Thought I’d sneak another chapter in today ^_^

Heheh, I’d hate to pick on the very first sentence, but the ’was’ in Was the morning wake-up Etain received... should not be capitalized.

Looking around the tent she saw that she and Rhiannon were the last ones left. --> since it might be confusing to the reader where the pause is in this sentence, i’d put a comma in after ’tent.’

She and Rhiannon rushed past the tribe campfire and drying racks to the communal tent, which was set up right beside the [councils] tent. --> council’s

Setana picked up [Etains] hand in hers when she sat down... --> Etain’s

Oo, I’m curious to see how the communal meeting is conducted ^_^

Marla’s small (1) heavyset frame was situated between two of the councils (2) oldest members. Her lined face and cataract (3) clouded eyes held a glow of excitement that illuminated her entire body.
Gotta couple picks here:
1. a comma after ’small,’ methinks... though it might be optional...
2. council’s
3. cataract-clouded

I really like how you handled the revelation of Capel Celyn. Instead of switching into "infodump" mode and saying something like: "Capel Celyn was blah blah bla, and blabbity blabby blah," you expressed Etain’s confusion about it. She’s heard of it, but not much more. I especially like: And if Capel Celyn was such a great place, why did they no longer live there? ^_^

Her raspy voice drifted over their heads like a [butterflies] erratic flight. --> butterfly’s

Heheh, I’m starting to think an apostrophe imp came through and stole all your apostrophes ^_~


:-) Liz Verde replies: "Eep, sorry it’s taken me so long to reply! I came down with the flu (bah!) and I’ve been couch ridden since Sunday evening. This one hit really fast. Saturday I got home from my nephews birthday and had this weird scratchy throat come up all of a sudden and then Sunday morning I had laryngitis and a fever and then Monday all hannah broke loose and I haven’t felt good ever since. I ended up sleeping off and on for 18 hours straight from Monday to Tuesday after I got home from work at 2pm. But hopefully tomorrow I’ll start feeling better since I’ve been doing absolutely nothing but sleeping off and on throughout the day. I think my record for staying awake was 5 hours. I don’t remember ever having a cold that’s done this to me before. Usually it’s 1 or 2 days of feeling gross and then I’m back to my usual self.

Ah yes, this piece hasn’t been updated since I put it up, so I’ll be the first to admit that there are MANY errors in here - hopefully most have already been fixed on my hard copy - it’s just a matter of re-typing it all up since I had to switch it to my laptop computer from my desktop and it screwed up the formatting. Grrr! [cringes when she sees how many grammatical errors there are in this piece] I swear, I’ve progressed since this!

I was trying to put myself in that character’s place and figure out exactly what she might be thinking ... and I think I came close. I know I’d be wondering why it was such a great place if we weren’t living there anymore."
22 Jun 2008:-) B. Layne Weaver
They did not suspect that the Fairy King Midir was becoming more and more jealous of the {Queens} lover. --> yup, Queen’s ^_^

He became so jealous that he could stand it no longer, and sent one of his people to the Queen’s lover as a "gift." --> because the quotations marks around gift are within another set of quotation marks, they should be single: ’gift.’" rather than "gift.""

But it was not to be so, for the fairy slowly poisoned the {Queens lovers} thoughts with greed and hate. --> Queen’s lover’s

Setana, seeing the look on {Williams} face, turned to Etain... --> William’s

"Quit being such a nit Leep," Keten lashed out. --> comma needed after ’nit’

Taking off her taren and folding it away into her sack, she told Rhiannon, "Well, I’m off to the healers (1) tent (2) I’ll see you in a bit."
1. healer’s
2. period needed after ’tent’

By the way, have I mentioned how much I like the names you use? They seem foreign and ethnic without being ’forced.’ It irks me when people use big long names with a lot of weird consonant-combinations with a random apostrophe thrown in for good measure. I like simple, pretty names like these so much better.

When Etain had left, Rhiannon went out to the square where the women were already {bustling about} getting food ready for the Samhain celebration. Women were {bustling about} stringing ... --> repetition of ’bustling about’ ^_^

"...Each {persons} light shines and reflects what they will it to." --> person’s

When she opened her eyes the tent was gone, and all she saw before her were the twin fires of Delane and Elleywen.
Dude! Cool! =D

{Etains} nervous gaze flickered from Princess Delane to Elleywen. --> Etain’s


:-) Liz Verde replies: "Ah, some of the names are just ones that pop into my head that I’d like to use for a character and others are ones that I’ve looked up. Baby names online is a great place to look - you can search through meanings or through ethnicity - which is great because then when I have a particular ethnic theme for a piece and I want that character to have a meaningful name I just have to go there. Others, like Tchekichaun, are just weird ones that randomly pop into my head and stay there - though his name really does seem to suit his character.

Being able to see the fire of someone’s existence was one of the touches that I really liked in this chapter. I’d love to be able to do a whole bunch of short stories focused on some of the little intricacies of this culture so that I could explain them fully but this story wouldn’t support that much detail.

Eeep, I’m fading fast here ... my eyes are really starting to brun from looking at the computer screen and it hasn’t even been ten minutes! Curse this cold! I can’t get anything done! I think I’ll have to save the last part of your wonderful comment for another day. [hugs]"
22 Jun 2008:-) B. Layne Weaver
Wow, I love the description of the healing process! That is very awesome ^_^

Elleywen got up and (1) as she passed behind Etain on her way to exit the tent, she laid her hand on Etains (2) shoulder and gave a squeeze of gratitude. When Etain looked into Delane’s face (3) she saw a smile curving her lips and a light in her eyes that had been dormant a long time.
1. comma after ’and’
2. Etain’s
3. comma after ’face’

...Delane advised before she too, got to her feet and exited in Elleywen’s wake. -> comma is needed before ’too’ as well as after it. You need either both or neither, but not only one.

I love the name Elleywen. It sounds Welsh or something ^_^

There were many times such as this that Etain would’ve given almost anything to be able to hear her {dogs} thoughts. --> dog’s

As she passed the hakkau corral on her way out into the desert she paused, a frown darkening her face. --> needs a comma after ’desert’

Once the leather had dried it was so stiff Etains feet had been sore with blisters for weeks.
>.< Ouch. Needs a comma after ’dried,’ though, and an apostrophe for Etain’s



:-) Liz Verde replies: "Yeah, I really like the way healing magic works in this world too. I can’t wait until I get to write more parts with healing magic. Part 5 has quite a bit of it too and there’s an interesting twist that happens! [dances around gleefully] Part 5 is one of my favourites.

I’ve got a soft spot for Welsh names.

Ah, so many shoes I’ve had that have given me blisters, now I can pass on this curse to someone else! Wahahaha!"
22 Jun 2008:-) B. Layne Weaver
She’d just found a flowering cacti plant when she happened to look up. --> since she’d found only one, shouldn’t it be cactus?

It could only mean one thing, sand storm. --> I think if you change that comma into a colon, it would give the "sand storm" more ominous power. Give it a try and see what you think.

When she was near enough to camp (*) she could hear the bell warning of the impending storm. --> needs a comma where I’ve marked

You described that storm very well! O_O I certainly wouldn’t want to be caught out in it. Eep!

A priest stood by the {girls boyd}, face bowed as he recited the rites. --> girl’s body ^_~

Her mother knelt at her {daughters} side, hands reflexively clenching in the sand as if seeking purchase in her fractured world... --> daughter’s
Poor woman ~_~

O_O Wow... and I love that they can see Tchekichaun!

Lots of apostrophe problems in this chapter, but that’s the only recurring problem. I love your descriptions and characters as always, and the ceremonies you had in this chapter were very, very intriguing!

:-) Liz Verde replies: "I think so ... guess I was just having fun there, haha.

Mmm, I agree.

I always love when we have storms here because it sounds so cozy being in the house - though here they aren’t deadly sand storms, just nice computer-frying thunderstorms.

My dad once described a grieving woman from his village in Portugal who was keening at the loss of her child and that image has stayed with me ever since - and what a goosebump-raising sound, keening.

My favourite part of writing is often the planning of the story - I’m still at a writing place where I can’t do justice to the stories in my head that I’d like to - and that’s probably why I enjoy planning so much because the images seem so much better in my head than what comes out on the paper. But I definitely enjoy dreaming up different cultures with unique customs, etc."
26 Jun 2008:-) B. Layne Weaver
Aww, you poor thing!! *hugs* I hope you feel much better soon! I had bronchitis and the flu in March, and that thing knocked me through a loop for about a month. They put me on 3 rounds of antibiotics. I only had one week, though, of about what you are going through--where you just want to sleep all day and are couch-ridden. For some reason, when I’m sick, I prefer the couch to my bed. It’s like I want the rest of the family to see how pitiful I feel ^_^

Anyway, no rush to replying to comments, hon. Just get you some good rest, and drink lots of fluids!!

:-) Liz Verde replies: "Yeah, this thing doesn’t seem to want to let go - frustrating! The cough medicine isn’t working. Ouch! Poor you! My mom always ends up getting bronchitis when she gets colds now, ever since she had pneumonia when she was pregnant with me and she has to go on antibiotics - I always hate bringing colds home because I know they’ll hit her so much worse.

I’m the same, preferring the couch to my bed. Maybe it’s that we need the comfort of other people around when we aren’t feeling well."
28 Aug 2008:-) Debbie Newcomb
That’s such a touching picture to leave us with. Poor girl. v_v Etain passed her second test! Huzzah! Once again, very nice. ^_^ Onward!

:-) Liz Verde replies: "That’s a favourite little moment of mine with the little girl ... when I re-write this I think I’m going to elaborate on more details for that part.

[starts singing ’Heigh ho, high ho, it’s off to work we go!’]"
23 Sep 2008:-) Barbara J. Wickham
I really love the healing process and how it involves energies from the healer’s and patient’s bodies. I find myself thinking of subjects like Chi, bio-magnetics and other studies regarding the channels of energy in the human body. Etain’s ministrations have a touch of those techniques, but with a more magical focus. I especially liked the visualization of the ball of green flame in the palm of her hand. Green is a very healing color, at least for me.

I also liked the appearance of Tchekichaun to the mourners in the end. What a comfort that must be to a loved one, to actually see the spirit of the departed in the company of a respected deity.

Etain’s tribe has a very rich spiritual side, which I find is often the case when a people lives in a harsh landscape. Your vivid description of the sandstorm and it’s effects really illustrates how rough the tribe’s life can be. Even this early in my reading of the story I’m finding it easy to admire these hardy folks.

I am eager to learn more, so I’m off to the next chapter! Woo hoo!
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