latkinson3

Hi I'm Loz, I was born on the 18th of March 1988. I am a dynamic figure often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees and using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferious army ants. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic and I can go cross-eyed at will. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small objects with deadly accuracy and I breed prize winning clams. I don't perspire. I'm open to new ideas. My common catch phrase is, 'Why is there a fungus where there wasn't a fungus before?'. I aspire to be a human toaster oven...