First, a *Warning*
If you are at all uncomfortable with the topics of fallen angels, suicide, or the two being combined, then this picture isn't for you.
As the subject matter may show, this picture was drawn in a time of turmoil for me. I was more or less depressed, and this was one of the images from my mind that come out on the end of my pencil as I sketched to pass the time.
The idea behind Crimson Sin, the song which later came out of this idea, is to question whether or not suicide is a sin. Which is the greater evil? To end suffering or to endure it? For those that understand the deepest darknesses of depressions, you can understand that when you get there you're not even worrying about it getting even a bit better. Your mind becomes bent on ending the pain, however it can. For some people that's to remove the problem that causes it - a bad relationship - or to run from it, for others it is to end themself. For those few that decide to end themselves, they are those that often have dealt with great adversity. It is sad, then, that we put them through such adversity should they survive.
The story behind the picture is one that begins in another song of mine, Free Falling Angel. It tells the story of an angel who questions the benevolence of a God that lets so much suffering happen in the world. While Free Falling Angel details the more philisophical side of the thinking and the 'fall from grace,' Crimson Sin is the final destination. More or less, the angel in question si driven to suicide, although she ends up a bit ... unhinged ... don't mistake that for insanity. She is quite sane. Just her thoughts are those preoccupied with death and suffering, and those can drive even the strongest mind to do things that we may not otherwise.
I'll end the story blurb with the intro to Crimson Sin:
Maybe I should have killed a million people
Then maybe I would have ended the pain
Maybe I should end it myself
Is it a sin to end the pain?
The sketch took about 3 hours, and was done entirely in HB pencil. I had my girlfriend Reena do the figure for me (hoping to escape the short legs syndrome that way, ;) and she did the tattoos on the arms after her own. The rest is by me, including the wings, of which I am especially proud - took me 10 different times but I finally got a result a liked - packed with my usual amount of detail. This is the sketch version which I used to make the colour version, which I'm uploading at the same time.