'Why Can't I Hook USB Port to Stern?'

Sci fi/Fantasy image by

Paul Doyle

Better scan is HERE This is for an Elftown contest run by the wonderully talented AJ James---Adnama_Lavode on dA http://adnamalavode.deviantart.com/ ('Adnama' on Elftown, dismal_chocobo on LiveJournal (she's on my LJ friends' list). AJ has a little spoof of the film 'Pirates of the Caribbean' which is called 'Anthro Pirates', featuring good ('Sweet') and evil ('Sour') anthopomorphic characters. All of whom are female. INCREDIBLY GORGEOUS females for the most part, I must add. I particularly like Selera, Mindy and especially Maple ;-) Link to her Elftown 'exported wiki' gallery: Hello, sailor! Anyway, the inside-Elftown version of this wiki (where you can leave comments) caught on like wildfire. It was so popular that AJ announced a 'New Crew contest' which strted back in October, and just ended today. She allowed both male and female 'new crew' members. So naturally, I decided to give Pauly the anthro-Dragon another spin ;-) All in all, I think I like the inked version better. The darks are too dark, and the lights too bright. My entry description (the 99% uncolored version was also entered): 'Jack-of-all-useless-trades Pauly the Anthro-Dragon tries to fix navigation wheel errors on the 'Sweet' ship by downloading self-maintenance programs from the hard drive of his laptop computer. The 'Sour' ship has pulled up impatiently waiting their turn ;-) Ze colorziz! No, I was not on drugs when I colored this. Lemon/Lime for 'Sour', Orange for 'Sweet'. Or something.' Something tells me Selera (AJ's dragoness character) is going to make Pauly the Anthro-Dragon her love-pirate. ;-) :P

Published More than a year ago

Category Science fiction

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More by Paul Doyle

'Classical Dragon's Lament'

This is a poem about a typical, damsel-eating 'classic' dragon who finds himself besmitten with his virgin sacrifice, and therefore in a big dilemma.


I decided to break out of a rut, and try something completely different. So I got into a little challenge with Elfwood writer Leigh Erickson: If she could write about something OTHER than death, I would write a death poem! So here it is, about a fictitious Egyptian pharaoh named Chepankhtep (yes; I chickened out trying to come up with rhymes, so I left his name out of the poem! I hope it's exciting and fun . . . and has a twist. The Mexican mummies mentioned are no longer literally hanging around; they are in museums now. If you've ever seen the original 'Faces of Death', you've seen some of the Mexican mummies mentioned here. This is the very first attempt I've made at something this dark.

Santa Claus: Medieval Secret Undercover Agent---Episode Four, Slimetrail Skulks SantaVille

---This story is for Elfwood writer Che Franz Joseph Monro, who has been an excellent reader/critic, and is a fantastic writer in his own right--- I admit, I like Episode Three even though it's strange and not for the easily offended. However, there seems to be a lot in it saying 'this story sequence is doomed to imminent lameness after this installment.' It took me a long time to get back to this story, because a great number of things happening in my real life, like moving, getting eye muscle surgery for my son, getting into a couple minor auto accidents, and the holidays---and, of course, getting my Elfwood art gallery up. I'm glad I took a while coming back to this story, because this turned out way better (and way longer) than originally planned.Quick recap: Part One introduces the insanity and wins Mod's Choice despite a flawed story. Part Two focuses on adventure and some cheesy music. Part Three points out the strangeness of a certain religion, and winds up being bizarre (and gets the fewest 'hits') because I was willing to take risks. Part Four also takes risks. It doesn't take place on the border of Orcaporka on the planet Terradum, but at Santa's Village at the North Pole of our very own Earth. If you ever wondered what labor relations were like at the North Pole, here ya go. I believe this is the best one yet. I have scaled back the insane wackiness and taken a more mild, relaxed approach. Slimetrail the Imp has his moment of glory in this story. Brian Claus (the real brains behind Santa's Village) is unveiled in all his zitty, nerdy yet strangely cool glory. When you're done reading, please let me know if I should continue this story or not. I'd sooner discontinue it, rather than let it get staler and triter than your average made-for-TV 'Heartwarming Emotional Family Christmas Reunion Mushiness.' Or, as Neil Young sang so many years ago, 'It's better to burn out than it is to rust.'

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