Kim Schoonover

Ah'm a Mad Hatter with a Blastive Gun...

And there's nothing you can do about it. This would be my submission to the Bifrost 'Mad Hatters on Parade' project, even though I was originally planning to make a picture. Not sure what happened, here, but meh. This is the last entry into something akin to the blogs of today, written by a vampire that doesn't care what time of day it is so long as there are people to harangue and she has her trusty hat and umbrella with her.

A story of Stops

'Tis a story with no 'e's. I blame Megan Proverbs and my keyboard. Megan because she suggested I write a story with no 'e's and my keyboard because the 'e' key quit working and because of that, events led to Megan's suggestion. Understand, here, that I couldn't use the word 'the', past tense, and a great deal of the English language besides. So, sorry if it makes no sense. >. O_O?! Its August 19, and this got a mod's choice. Wow. this is awesome, but also slightly creepy. *is not going to explain*


Someone should give it a hug.


What explanation does this really need? But yes, this story does have a point. That point is to prove the point that stories don't necessarily have to have a point.

What Will Be

This is an idea. Upon consideration of how an immortal might tell his/her story, this was what came to mind. But it's just an idea...


Belief is a power more subtle that others, more potent than hope, more dangerous than fear. It is the integral of all these others, and so, so often, the meaning is lost.But the power remains. Apheori Dianallor is one of Rahah Okieshu's aliases, by the way, and savani is a magic for containing things.

Gods of confusion...

Once upon a time, a pair of adventurers set out on a quest, forgot what that quest was, got hopelessly lost, and ended up taking over the world. On another world, there are vampiric trees. On yet still another world, false gods of a different kind rule all... or at least, think they do because they're so drunk. On that same world, the cultures collide on a tangent in which one solitary witness escapes to tell the tale... riiiight. Whahahah, I had to write this... all because of the hiphopolatamus that Audrey Totire did. *smiles and starts purring* O_O?!

Ode to Pants

This is the result of Rahah's typing a poem about pants, and then being too lazy to say what she's thinking and instead typing it. And also, these are the American pants. Trousers.


How will the world end? When will it end? So many people would wonder these questions, but... How can one know that it hasn't already ended?

Wanted: Rahah Okeishu

I am a terrible person, and this is my wanted list. *shifty eyes* All the stuff listed here I have done at some point or another, whether in real life (O_O), on Elfwood (mostly), or as Rahah Okeishu in my stories... most of which have not yet been written. ^^ This is pretty much just the wanted list from my bio with some editing, reordering and reformatting. Sadly, it was too big to put as a jpeg format poster in the art area, so here it is in the library, all html-y. O_o Please don't hold what I have done against me, they've already kicked me out of Elfwood once for some of these things, and I actually sort of learned my lesson. For those. *looks around suspiciously* Deresi is a type of elf, a tierna is a special tatoo at one eye revealing one's affinity to magic, and savani is a magic for containing things. As for grons, nobody is entirely sure quite what they are, except that they have something to do with physics, or gravity or something. Yeesh, I just keep committing more and more crimes... o_O


Merfolk are actually quite similar to squid, especially if one goes by DNA. The DNA of a merperson is aproximately 99.967% identical to that of a squid. That is, of course, unless the squid is from another planet and so has no common ancestors, or perhaps its just something that was engineered to look like a squid in order to aid government conspiricies. Or, of corse, if its a robotic squid, because in that case it won't have DNA in the first place.

Otherworld's Sausage: Chapters 1-2

This is a story that Blade Marilyn, Greg Lyons, and myself were creating in Blade's forum. There may or may not be more chapters. However, what she said previously is entirely true. 'It does get kind of confusing, so don't try to make sense of it---just revel in the nonsensicalness.' So do!