 "Is it wrong to want content in a movie?" a co-worker asked. "You know, good characters, a solid script, a plot?"
"In this day and age..." replied another.
The answer, apparently, would be "yes". Sure, there are some movies out there that are more than just eye candy, but trust me, Star Wars: Episode 2 isn't one of them. After all, when you've already created a movie franchise 20 years ago and everyone knows the outcome of the movies you're making now, what else is there to do besides make it pretty?
Episode 2 picks up 10 years after Episode 1 ended, with Anakin full into his Jedi training (side note: what were the costume designers thinking?), Padme Amidala now as senator of Naboo trying not to be killed by bounty hunters, and unrest in the Republic, which leads to the create of the Separatist group. Obi-Wan is sent to find out who is trying to off Amidala, leaving Anakin to mack - err, protect her. He's told not to do anything without asking the Jedi council, which Anakin apparently forgets as soon as he is left alone. While Obi-Wan is visiting the clone army creators (who look ripped off from A.I.) we're tortured with watching what is supposed to be the growing love between Anakin and Padme. Two rocks have more chemistry than this. Anakin smirks and leers a lot, and Padme tells him to knock it off. But then she decides she loves him back. What?
Actually, I said "What?" a few times during this movie. Too many things in the plot seemed to exist solely for the purpose of setting up the later 3 movies. We see Anakin's fall towards the dark side in one of the only sequences that is built up through the movie: the return to his home planet and his mother. After a brief reunion with his old slave master, Anakin and Padme travel to his mom's new sand-igloo and learn that she's gotten married, been freed, and oops, been taken captive by apparently nasty Tuscan raiders. Carnage ensues. Anakin tells Padme of the carnage. She comforts him. What? Apparently killing is okay if you are avenging family members. Okay, let's get off those two. They're falling in love. They're annoying. We don't care.
Let's talk about action. There's a lot of it. The pod race is replaced with a hover cruiser chase. There's battle inside an asteroid belt. There's a scene inside the droid factory (a la Super Mario Brothers) where R2 saves the day... for a little while. It's cute to see R2 and C3PO together (again... for the first time... whatever), and you can see Lucas trying to build up that relationship they have in later episodes. There's a lots of laser guns, although Amidala looks like she is trying to fire hers without touching it. And oh yeah, light sabers. This is Star Wars after all. No double sided saber, but there's Yoda. George Lucas decided to have Yoda be completely digital in Ep2, and that's a good thing. No puppet could jump like that. But then again, isn't it a little odd to have 2-foot Yoda battling a 6-foot Christopher Lee? Maybe that's the point. Every movie needs a draw, after all.
And the movie is pretty. The digital cameras make everything crisp and clear, almost to the point of losing the realism. The soundtrack blends in familiar bits from the original scores, an effect that is both cool and cheesy, since we all know what certain music clips are supposed to mean. And perhaps they play it a bit too loud at times. Yes, John Williams is a good composer, but I'd like to hear what is actually happening in the movie. The computer graphics and special effects work well, for the most part. Some of the creature interactions with people seemed a bit jerky but it is a big improvement over Ep1. But while CG Yoda works, CG C3PO doesn't. It wasn't very much of the movie, but when you see a creaky, uptight robot lose some of his rigidity, he also loses some of his character definement. Unfortunately, character development is not something we see much of, and aside from Anakin's complaining and snotty retorts, the character we see the most sides of is the one that doesn't really exist: Yoda. Thankfully, beloved Yoda is not subjected to one of the many out-of-place or poorly delivered lines throughout the movie. Is this Star Wars or a Star Wars parody? When Anakin spouts one of the cliché lines from the later trilogy, he looks more like he's going to laugh than he has a bad feeling.
That all being said, if you have any level of desire to see this movie, go. Because it is a fun movie, and let's face it, the cheesy bits are part of what makes it Star Wars. And we know this isn't thought provoking stuff. So go, and check your brain at the door. Now that this review is done, I can, too.
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Rating: 3 fairies
Starring: Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Hayden Christiansen, Ian, McDiarmid, Samuel L. Jackson, Christopher Lee, Temuera Morrison
Official Website: http://www.starwars.com/episode-ii/
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This web page is part of a hosted copy of the WoodWorks eZine at Elfwood. (#383)