Dear Klimpen,

I was wondering, why do so many people harass the moderators by making them update their gallery for JUST ONE new picture? Isn't that rather unfair when they see the hundreds of tickets waiting to be processed? Why don't they wait until they have at least 4 new pictures?

Sincerely,
Someone who pities the mods
*sends over a virtual "Thank You" box of chocolates*


Dear Someone,

Humans are vain creatures, almost as vain as cats. They need to show off immediately, even if it's just one picture! Even then, it doesn't mean your ticket gets looked at at once.

I went over to the Mod HQ to have a chat with George the Rat (y'know... the half-cyborg rat that I almost broke my teeth on... we're on friendly terms now) and he recalled a ticket with 32 pictures that stayed in the queue for ages because it took forever to load and some of the pictures do not even belong to that gallery. It's not the number of pictures in a ticket that is important; it's whether or not the picture belongs. And it's faster to look at one or four picture than 32... won't you agree? I'm sure the mods appreciate your concern and your chocolates!

Dear Klimpen,

Do you know how hard it is to be a goddess? *sigh*

Stressfully yours, Bastet


Dear Bastet,

I imagine it's harder than being a cat.

Worshipfully yours, Klimpen.

Dear Klimpen;

I've been trying to improve my writing a bit lately, and someone told me , I'm not using commas correctly. They also said, I'm not using semicolons correctly; and I want to be able to get this right. How are they correctly used?

Signed; Comma Confused


Dear Confused,

Commas are commonly used to separate items that might otherwise be misunderstood. Semicolons are more interesting; they are stronger than commas, but weaker than periods. In other words, they can be used to end a sentence but not really end it; rather like how I'm using it. If you ask me, the semicolon looks like someone squished a fly on top of a comma, but I soon found that no amount of licking or pawing could get it off. The monitor is a bit smeared though.

(Editor's note: Klimpen was licking this)

Dear Klimpen,

I like to dress up all StarTrek-tastic in my Data costume, and hit the town looking for some cute Bajorans babes to come back to my outpost and see my fabbo collectable figurines. Frequently I see people pointing, and sniggering behind their hands, and I feel as if I'm missing out on some joke. Please help, what am I missing?

- Trekkie Fan


Dear Trekkie,

I would say "a brain". You sound like an unusual human with unusual tastes. I hear that there are things called Star Trek conventions where a lot of other people dress up as characters from the show. You might have better luck there and people won't laugh at you because they all look silly too.

Dear Klimpen;

Why do women like cute butts?

- Puzzled


Dear Puzzled,

Not all women like cute butts. Some of them like cute cats. *preens*