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Header art by
Trace Webster

 This web page is part of a hosted copy of the WoodWorks eZine at Elfwood.  (#706)
The eZine is no longer updated, nor does it have it's own domain left... This also means that it's no use to contact the WoodWorks editors, etc, etc...
IRC Funnies
from #Wyverns_Library & #Lothlorien

From #Wyverns_library

Drawin_Yawg (Quit: If men learn how to cook and clean up after themselves, what's our motivation for getting married?)
KassFireborn> the balls! the damned balls!

Impresario> You know.. for constantly making people laugh, I'm never in the f'ing funnies anymore.

* Io just keeps looking back and forth between Muffin and Lucas
Solenna> aside from the fact one looks like Jesus and the other is a punk.... the similarities are amazing

Tarlia> I just came to a horrible realisation...
Tarlia> There's no 50 Most Eligable Bachelors in this month's CLEO. ;.;
Tarlia> It happened folks... Malaysia ran out of Eligable Bachelors.
KassFireborn> no!
KassFireborn> there must be hot men!
Io> gette: :O
KassFireborn> without hot men we will die!
Io> hrmm
* Io shares with Gette a present she got for Xmas...
DrMuffin> note to self: move to Malaysia.
Tarlia> I dn't want to see naked Grizz....

* SisTabby had a revelation today.
Io> what's that? :)
* DrMuffin grins
SisTabby> Cola comes from a nut and a leaf. Vanilla comes from a bean. Ergo, vanilla Coke equals two servings of vegetables.

MTKnight> Now I know what it feels like to be a WW termite. You volunteer in a drunken fit of enthusiasm, then wake up the next day and wonder just what the hell came over you.

Zeke> how much I suck:
Zeke> Cavefish: or better yet, I'll get some coffee
Zeke> Bruiser: I want some too
Zeke> Cavefish: I'd share, but my arms aren't that long
Zeke> Cavefish: if only I'd been born a bidget!
Zeke> Cavefish: er
Zeke> Cavefish: midget.
Zeke> Cavefish: but that's not the word I wanted.
Zeke> Cavefish: I wanted to say gorilla
Tarlia> XD
Tarlia> the same guy who confuses 'gorilla' and 'groinilla'?

* Canthlian hangs his head in shame
Canthlian> I still say it's Kass's fault.
MTKnight> Canth: Always easy to blame Kassandra. :)
Canthlian> And so USEFUL!
Canthlian> And often correct. :P

Canthlian> Grarg.
Canthlian> Within 2 hours of my brother arriving here, he's already tried to break into my room 3 times, accused me of falsely stealing a DVD 5, and caused trouble ... off the scale.
* DrMuffin blinks
* Canthlian looks up recipies for tasteless poisons on the internet...
SisTabby> Ah, the Internet. Your one-stop shop for everything tasteless.

*** Tarlia has quit IRC (Quit: My wit is dry. Please add water.)br> * KassFireborn waters gette
* Canthlian gets the food pills
Canthlian> I wonder what she'll grow into?
KassFireborn> An Idea Tree
Canthlian> Oh dear.
Canthlian> That could be dangerous.

KassFireborn> say, are you the evil making me proposition a british librarian?

* Raindance has joined #wyverns_library
Raindance> mornin
Zeke> oi oi oi
Tarlia> mroo
Zeke> welcome to th eslut club!
* Zeke is now known as TurboSlut
* Tarlia sneaks under a chair
* Hermes is now known as King_ofthe_Whores
* Raindance sneaks under the sofa
King_ofthe_Whores> ok...this is too long...
* King_ofthe_Whores is now known as Hermes
TurboSlut> whoreking?
TurboSlut> that looks too much like a not-so-clever variant of working.
Hermes> no
Hermes> say it out loud
Tarlia> I thought he might go for 'Whore King'. But 'Hermes' means the same thing.

Canthlian> Mental Hairball of the Day: Gandalf wearing a facial pack. And cucumber slices on his eyes. :P
KassFireborn> that's an impressive hairball
Canthlian> Thankyou.
KassFireborn> "I was given a spa treatment... and sent back."
* Canthlian thinks of Gandalf the Sparkly White and almost chokes laughign

KassFireborn> "The Unholy Grail. Drinking from it is NOT recommended. "
Canthlian> *Snicker*
Canthlian> Why not?
Canthlian> Drinking from the Unholy Grain gives you Unholy Power.
Tarlia> From Unholy Grain, springs forth Unholy Rice.
Canthlian> .......
Canthlian> Yipe.
Canthlian> Unholy Grain?
Canthlian> What have I done now? o_O
KassFireborn> you typoed it
Canthlian> I'm dangerous.
Tarlia> Eat rice.
Tarlia> hey! We can get Unholy Bread from Unholy Grain too! Corrupt the Holy Communion!
KassFireborn> "Communion wafers. Laboratory analysis will reveal that they are made of human flesh. "
Canthlian> ......
Canthlian> That's .... quite a coincidence.
Tarlia> see? New #WL product already.

* Canthlian mourns for his lost WriteThis
Canthlian> I'm going to arrange a funeral.
Tarlia> aww
Canthlian> Or at least, a ceremony, there being no body and all.
* Canthlian jumps into priestly-like clothes
Canthlian> Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the passing of WriteThis excercise 2, brought into existence on the 23 of Feburary at 2:40 AM, and leaving our presence at 2:51 AM.
* Tarlia desperately tries to keep a straight face.
Canthlian> I shall now turn the proceedings over to the person who knew WTe2 the best, Mr. Harvey.
* Canthlian jumps into a tux
Canthlian> What can I say about WTe2? He was a wonderful person. He was full, almost complete in every way. His life, short though it was, was full of incident, and he was always growing, learning more. The world is going to seem empty without WTe2. I know I will.
* Canthlian dives back into the priest robes
Canthlian> As there is no body to commerate, we shall instead remember WTe2 in a different fashion. Mr. Harvey? If you please.
* Canthlian comes over with a consecrated floppy disk and hands it to himself
Canthlian> This disk shall forever reside in a protected place, watched over by monks, to see that it is never used. Except if we're too lazy to go in and get some more.
Canthlian> The proceedings are now over. Please, leave as you will.
* Canthlian pulls on his normal clothes and grins
Canthlian> I feel better now somehow.
* Tarlia rollz XD
* Canthlian giggles insanely
Tarlia> wait a minute... i'm immortalising this piece of stupidity XD
Canthlian> Feel free!
Canthlian> I'm laughing too hard to stop you. XD

From #Lothlorien

Master> so anyways, what do you think of my fay?
NearDead> hairy legs ^_^
Master> heh, thats not supposed to be there
Master> ignore that
Nimitz> nice, maybe be nice with colour. i like eating more than cooking

* Hermes ponders sleeping... s'been a long day.
Dark_Scribble> night Ric
Ryoshi> bye hermes
Hermes> I'm gonna head ou... .
Dark_Scribble> XD
Hermes> yeah, bye guys. I'll ttyal
ivyroses> sweet dreams
* Dark_Scribble hugs
* Hermes passes out a few of them huggle thingies and stuff.
*** Hermes (Hermes@usr-...) Quit (Quit: Get it off! Get it off!!)
Dark_Scribble> that was priceless...

* MightyMidget1 feeds grapes to Hermes*
Hermes> --- >^
* Raindance stays away from the grapes.. has a bad habit of feeling them...
Raindance> >.>
Raindance> <.<
MightyMidget1> XD

* Raindance sneaks towards the door
Bosq> Freeze!
* Raindance turns into a popsicle x.x
Bosq> Oops.
* Bosq needs to adjust his spell-launching device
* Raindance starts to melt
Bosq> Unfreeze!
Raindance> "I'm melting... meeEEEeeeltinnnnnggggg... oooh what a world what a world!"
Valandar> o.o
* Raindance plops down and waits for when no one is watching
* Bosq installs cameras to watch over the door
* Raindance climbs out the window. ^_^
Raindance> night night people ^_^
Bosq> Damn. Foiled again.
Bosq> Night Rainy.
* Master starts doing a funny dance as a distraction
* Raindance patpats Bosq
Master> night
Raindance> nice try ;)

mastermike> ok, new topic, what did everyone have for lunch?
Raindance> food
mastermike> ok, that topic will not work

Raindance> o/` almond joys have nuts, mounds don't o/`
Avaz|3D-ing> then i'm an almond joy. You arent, rainy :P
allcuishpa> that's because mounds are girls :D
allcuishpa> i like to eat mounds.
Raindance> you know you've been in #loth too long when your mind twists that little jingle....
* Solenna nodnods

Pennyroyal> trillian: "I'm connected to IRC! ^-^" me: "woohoo! take me to #loth!" trillian: "Okay!" me: "^^" trillian: "^^" me: "..." trillian: "aren't i great! ^-^" me: "@.@"
Adeaya> i used trillion and can't figure out irc on it either penny...then again i'm blonde and have a tendency to be slow sometimes lol
Darantariel> LoL
Pennyroyal> yeah... i certainly tried to :p
Raindance> o.o
Adeaya> rofl

ResidentCynic> Ryco, are you a guy?
Ryco> I don't know ;-;
Ryco> Yes
ResidentCynic> O_O
ResidentCynic> Wicked timing there.

* Anty skids over to Jedi and smoochies :D
Raindance> ewww kisses!
Raindance> sorry... little kid moment...
Raindance> >.>
Raindance> <.<

ComicPelzball> (quit
ComicPelzball> err
ComicPelzball> duh
ComicPelzball> clame it on reading comics all day
ComicPelzball> blame...
Tyto_Alba> XD
drgnlvr> lol
ComicPelzball> ok, I'm just going to leave now
*** ComicPelzball (nein@usr-...) Quit (Quit: )
drgnlvr> Pelz having a hard time now ^^;;
* Tyto_Alba snickers
OtakuRaver> .. no comment

***drgnAFK is now known as drgnlver
drgnlver> ACK
*** drgnlver is now known as drgnlvr
Scribble> hehehehe!
Kyosuke> ^_^;
Kyosuke> hello
Scribble> a vowel snuck in on ya >:D
drgnlvr> oh, hush! XDXD

* Raindance swaggers off to bed x.x
Tyto_Alba> night, Rainy!
Raindance> night all
Tyto_Alba> There a reason for that swagger?
Tyto_Alba> >.>
Tyto_Alba> Because... you know... the only people who I know that swagger... are... um... <.<
*** Raindance Quit (Quit: You're too perky. Can I shoot you now?)
*** Raindance has joined #lothlorien
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Raindance
Raindance> oh... I am not drunk.. so :P
Raindance> g'night
Tyto_Alba> XD
Tyto_Alba> Night!
Raindance> XD
*** Raindance Quit (Quit: )

* Tyto_Alba browses her library in Rama's hat
* RivoClavis knocks on Rama's head
Tyto_Alba> Who is it?

* Tyto_Alba swims in Rainy's cereal
* Raindance flicks Penny out of her cereal
* Tyto_Alba lands with a milky splat on the floor and preens her feathers*
* Hermes gathers up Penny's dignity off the floor and hands it to her discreetly
Hermes> you dropped this. ;)
Tyto_Alba> Thank you, I'd wondered where that'd gotten to...

* Raindance plots ways to raid the brownies...
Raindance> ah heck with it... I'm the one that made them... brb
Ryoshi> XD

Collected by Megan Larson and Megan Starks

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Copyright © 2003 Woodworks eZine