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Madame Million's Horoscopes
by Madame Million

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
You need a pick-me-up! Go out and splurge, just a little, on a special something that will make you feel better. Your muse will catch up with you later in the month, providing hours of entertainment and producing a fair chunk of work. Trying to walk around in the dark will result in very colorful bruises.

Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
You've got a piece you've been working on for a long time and it's not feeling as if it's going well. Have faith! It will be salvagable with the correct effort. Take some breaks, later in the month. You've worked hard and deserve a little R and R. Pay special attention to your fingernails.

Aries (March 21 - April 20)
An old friend will show up unexpectedly, bringing back with them a host of memories and ideas. Even if your meeting is brief, that echo of the past will spur creative energy through the entire month. Examine the way that you treat people this month. There is a lot to be said for not saying what you think.

Taurus (April 21 - May 20)
Some household chores are calling your name. You've been ignoring them this long, it won't hurt to put them off to scribble down that new idea or picture composition. Cute and fuzzy things will start to lose their charm with you. Explore the darker side of art and writing this month.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Play with light and dark themes this month. Push the boundaries! While you may start to feel you are treading on something cliche and overdone, the resultant work will be somehow deeper and more meaningful than you thought it could be. It's time to vacuum and sweep, too. Have you looked at the dust bunnies under your bed lately? They may be planning a revolt...

Cancer (June 21 - July 20)
Sweet leaping lizards! The idea will be piling up this month, so fast that you hardly have time to scribble them down. Share the wealth; those ideas will be multiplied with some brainstorming with someone close. Don't put things off until the last moment, you'll find that your muse has her own direction to go, and it will take some time and persuation to make that project perfect.

Leo (July 21 - August 21)
Spend some time looking through photos this month. You'll find yourself wishing for simpler, younger times, and that will reflect beautifully into your creative work. Walk with caution in busy areas; the extra attention will save you some spectacular spills. Use that phone! Someone's expecting a call from you.

Virgo (August 22 - September 22)
You will regret something said in anger this month. It will take some deep soul-searching and a lot of thought, but you'll figure out the best thing to do. It will be hard, and you will find your muse rising to the challenge and seeing you through this difficult time with delicious ideas and smooth-flowing creativity.

Libra (September 23 - October 22)
While this month will feel less busy than last month, you'll still find yourself shaking your head and saying 'I can't believe it's already Friday' at the end of each week. That evil, addictive drink that you love will be irresistable to you, but you'll find that your health improves exponentially if you cut down.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 22)
Take that advice with a grain of salt, and remember that wise people don't always say wise things. A bout of the hiccups will come at exactly the wrong time. Your muse will be whispering ideas in your ear all month. Jot them down! Get out and do something you've been wanting to do for months now.

Sagittarius (November 23 - December 20)
A pet of a friend will do something horrible this month, making you keenly aware of the value of cuteness. Listen closely; an accent or regional turn of phrase will confuse you and could lead to a drastic misunderstanding. Take something small and special with you on a whim one day this month.

Capricorn (December 21 - January 19)
Ponder deeply on the letter 'z'. Unlike its second cousin 'x,' the 'z' is unappreciated for its compositional grace. And it represents sleep, which will feel like a delicious luxury this month. Setting a regimented schedule will seem like a good idea, but you will find that everything seems to be in your way of following it.


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