"No Sense" by Alicia Hansen

No Sense: Part I

“That’s dumb,” Talvor muttered as he reined his stallion to a stop and leapt to the leafy ground. The gray warhorse ambled aside to nose at the forest grass surrounding the base of one of the mighty oaks soaring above them.

“I never said it was practical,” Dharyna muttered as she turned the small mirror over in her hands. “I only said this must be the Magical Mirror.”

Talvor crouched beside the sprawled corpse on the ground. Over their journeys, he had tried to shelter Dharyna from things like this only to be slapped, lectured and then ignored. He would never understand women. The man was a peasant, old and grizzled. Gnarled hands were clenched tightly over his chest, his wrinkled face frozen in fear. Bloody slashes had opened his chest and stomach. Talvor grimaced as he gripped the cold, gray hands and tried to pry them apart. They wouldn’t budge.

“Cut them off,” Dharyna said without hesitation. She turned her palomino mare around so that she could watch Talvor work. “There’s no other way you’ll unclench those hands.”

Talvor glanced over his shoulder at her. “Did you have a mother growing up?”

Her eyes narrowed and she planted her right hand on her hip, her left tightly holding the reins of her jittery mare. “Yes, I had a mother. Don’t be a fool, Talvor. Do you think a woman would be scared of a little blood? Why, if it weren’t for women, you fool men would die from your battle wounds we heal.”

Talvor grumped a noncommittal reply and frowned at the man. It hadn’t been a wild animal that killed him. No wild animal would leave food like this uncovered. A brigand, maybe? Or something else? Talvor’s hand drifted to his sword and he stared at the man’s face.

“Oh, if you don’t have the guts for cutting a dead man’s hands off, step back and I’ll do it.” Her saddle creaked as she stood, ready to swing down.

“I can do it, Dharyna.” He pulled the blade free with several muttered curses and cut the hands off at the wrists. The hands opened to reveal a glittering red gem the size of hen’s egg. Talvor whistled as he picked it up and held it towards the light.

She gasped from behind him. “Hand it here, Talvor.”

He straightened and tucked the ruby into his belt pouch before sheathing his sword. “I don’t think so, Dharyna. You carry your magical mirror and I’ll carry this.” Ignoring her frosty glare, Talvor swung atop his gray stallion and booted the warhorse to a trot. He couldn’t shake the old man’s face from his mind. Who had killed the man? Why? Was the killer watching them now? After awhile of silence, he slowed his mount and let her catch up to ride abreast of him. “So what does your mirror do exactly?”

“You think I can tell from looking? Please.” She sniffed and turned her gaze to look at the forest around them. Songbirds flitted through the leafy treetops and the wind whispered through like the long-lost voices of spirits. “It could do any of a million things, Talvor. Haven’t you learned anything about magic?”

Coming from someone who doesn’t know a rapier from a scimitar, he thought sourly. “No, nothing from what you’ve taught.” If that could be considered teaching. He clenched his teeth and hissed. “Maybe it can take you somewhere else.”

“You’re stuck going with me, Talvor. Your stupid promise to my brother keeps you near. How long are you going to ‘protect’ me?”

Talvor growled and kept his gaze straight ahead. “Until I get you home.”

She laughed and rested her hand on his arm. “You are a fool, Talvor. You’ve a better chance to teach yourself some intelligence than to get me back there.”

He rolled his eyes. Was it just a womanly thing to constantly insult a man’s intelligence? Why did they do that? And why were they so stubborn when it came to being practical? She didn’t belong where it was dangerous, so why did she want to stay? And why had he promised Rhajyn to look after his sister? Rhajyn had probably gone off somewhere and gotten himself killed. Despite it all, promises were promises and Talvor wasn’t about to break his oath because of one arrogant, stubborn woman. “Rhajyn knew you well enough, Dharyna. He knew you’d get into trouble.”

“And I—” She wisely cut off.

“Got yourself into plenty of trouble.” Talvor glanced sideways at her. “The sooner I can hand you off to Rhajyn, the better.”

“Hand me—? Talvor Jer’rhia, how dare you think that I am so easily pushed aside. You’ll not be rid of me so easily.” She bristled and straightened in the saddle. “And I could have gotten myself out just fine with a little more time.”

Talvor only nodded. She would argue anything and everything. If he said they should one way, she wanted to go the other. If he told her the noon sky was blue, she’d tell him what an incompetent fool he was and that it was red. “Just until we find Rhajyn. Then I have to go. I guess at that time it will be your choice which way you go. But until then you’re my responsibility and I will see you safely to your brother if I have to tie you hand and foot and stuff you in a saddlebag.” He suspected he’d end up limping at the very least if he tried something like that, but made no comment.

To his surprise, Daryna did not get angry and instead cocked her head, thinking. Finally she shook her head and laughed. “You are a fool, Talvor. A feather-brained fool.” She smiled to him. “That’s what I like about you.” She slammed her heels into her golden mare’s flanks and the long-legged mare shot off in a thundering gallop.

Talvor stared dumbly after her. Women made no sense whatsoever. Grumbling to himself, he spurred his stallion after her. No sense whatsoever.

No Sense: Part II

“That’s dumb.”

Dharyna glowered at Talvor’s back as he swung down from his gray warhorse to look at the dead man lying on the ground. She fingered the hand-held mirror in her hands. Roses encircled the reflecting surface, overlaid with rich gilt that glittered in the little sunlight that filtered down through the leaves overhead. “I never said it was practical. I only said this has to be the Magical Mirror.”

Talvor leaned over the dead man, trying vainly to put himself between her and the corpse. He always thought she needed to be protected from every little thing. Talvor grasped the dead man’s hands and tried to pull them apart, but couldn’t.

“Cut them off,” Dharyna suggested as she tucked the mirror into one of her saddlebags. “There’s no other way you’ll unclench those hands.

He glared over his shoulder at her. “Didn’t you have a mother growing up?”

She narrowed her eyes. What a feather-brained thing to ask! “Yes, I had a mother. Don’t be a fool, Talvor. Do you think a woman would be scared of a little blood? Why, if it weren’t for women, you fool men would die from your battle wounds we heal.” Wool-headed lummox!

Talvor grunted. That always meant he was being stubborn but not ready to argue yet. Talvor’s hand drifted towards the sword at his side as though he couldn’t decide whether to use it or not.

“Oh, if you don’t have the guts for cutting a dead man’s hands off, step back and I’ll do it.” Dharyna stood in her saddle and prepared to swing off. That usually got Talvor’s attention and she wouldn’t have to dirty her hands. She wondered again if he realized how gullible he was.

“I can do it, Dharyna.” He pulled the blade free with several muttered curses and sliced the hands off at the wrists. Talvor whistled as he picked something up and held it towards the light.

She sat back hard; she could see the sparkling red gem in his hands. “Hand it here, Talvor.” Men were never to be trusted with such things.

He straightened and tucked the ruby into his belt pouch before sheathing his sword. “I don’t think so, Dharyna. You carry your magical mirror and I’ll carry this.” Keeping his back to her to avoid her glare, Talvor swung atop his gray stallion and booted the warhorse to a trot. Dharyna spurred her golden mare after him. After awhile of silence, he slowed his mount and let her catch up to ride abreast of him. “So what does your mirror do exactly?”

“You think I can tell from looking? Please.” She sniffed and turned her gaze to look at the forest around them. Songbirds flitted through the leafy treetops and the wind whispered through like the long-lost voices of spirits. Why were men always so dense? You could tell a man something a hundred times a day, every day, and he’d still forget it. “It could do any of a million things, Talvor. Haven’t you learned anything about magic?” How many times had she explained magical elements to him?

“No, nothing from what you’ve taught.” His voice dripped with sarcasm. His jaw clenched and he hissed. “Maybe it can take you somewhere else.”

“You’re stuck going with me, Talvor. Your stupid promise to my brother keeps you near. How long are you going to ‘protect’ me?” She grinned at him. Men were sticklers about their oaths when it came to unimportant things; but never trust a man to remember something important.

Talvor kept his gaze straight ahead. “Until I get you home.”

She laughed and rested her hand on his arm. “You are a fool, Talvor. You’ve a better chance to teach yourself some intelligence than to get me back there.” She would sooner walk into a fire than her home. What would her parents do?

 “Rhajyn knew you well enough, Dharyna. He knew you’d get into trouble.”

“And I—” She stopped with a glare. So maybe she had gotten in a little over her head . . . It wasn’t as though she’d never helped him get out of his own cauldron of hot water.

“Got yourself into plenty of trouble.” Talvor glanced sideways at her. “The sooner I can hand you off to Rhajyn, the better.”

“Hand me—? Talvor Jer’rhia, how dare you think that I am so easily pushed aside. You’ll not be rid of me so easily.” She bristled and straightened in the saddle. “And I could have gotten myself out just fine with a little more time.” Fool men and their fool-brained ideas of gallantry. Why couldn’t he just let her be anyhow?

Talvor only nodded. “Just until we find Rhajyn. Then I have to go. I guess at that time it will be your choice which way you go. But until then you’re my responsibility and I will see you safely to your brother if I have to tie you hand and foot and stuff you in a saddlebag.”      

Dharyna shook her head and laughed. Men always made threats that they’d never dare carry out. “You are a fool, Talvor. A feather-brained fool.” She smiled to him. “That’s what I like about you.” She slammed her heels into her golden mare’s flanks and the long-legged mare shot off in a thundering gallop. He would follow. He always did. Men were just so predictable—except when it came to being sensible.