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Ben Cameron

"Guardian (poem)" by Ben Cameron

SciFi/Fantasy text 11 out of 29 by Ben Cameron.      ←Previous - Next→
 
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This turned out quite different from how I intended it, but I don't mind how it turned out. I guess it could be described as an explanation for what happened to all those creatures from mythology. Some of the rhymes are a bit forced... any suggestions would be appreciated.

Updated: 7/01/04
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←- Forbidden Hearts, Part 2 | Defence of Melchior -→

From innocent imaginings and wild dreams in the night

While the world was growing, came an ancient race

Reptiles born from the shadows of myth; creatures of fiery flight

The power of nature inherit in their hide

But to protect the innocent they were forced to live apart

For to them, was their power inexplicably tied

 

Their cry reached the distant city folk who trembled as they heard

The calling of their nightmares true: the dragons come to life

In gaping chasms and craggy peaks these giant creatures stirred

And lifting, soaring, gliding down, they swept across the sky

But despite their size and splendour; as wild as nature be

Innocence hid them from the peril drawing nigh

 

For some that gazed on the dragons were filled with strange unrest

Their thoughts wandered everyday towards those great scaled beasts

Until they met and saddled up, riding five abreast

Each and every one they tracked, till all bar one they’d found

And what should have been a lifetime rivalling the elves

Was ended with a thrust, left to rot upon the ground.

 

As the dragons became extinct, magic became a tradition

And other magical beasts died; pixies, mermaids, sprites

Till they all became legend and then mere fiction

For dragons were the guardians ensuring magic did thrive

Thus with their death, science took charge, and facts replaced fancy

Except for that one sole dragon, who kept the myths alive.

 

←- Forbidden Hearts, Part 2 | Defence of Melchior -→

DateNameComment 
30 Dec 2003:-) Nicholas G. DeBruno
I don't think that this peice needs any help whatsoever! It is awesome. I really liked the style you wrote it in. And that poor dragon must be so lonely being the last one and all. If only I was a dragon....

11 Ben Cameron replies: "Thanks for your comments. Even if I don't believe there's nothing wrong, I appreciate it muchly. And I think most of us have, at one point, wanted to be a dragon... *sighs wistfully*"
30 Dec 2003:-) Dtauri
I certainly believe so. I think the idea is great of course (as most of the commenters here) and I really like your wording and imagery in parts. In fact, if you have the cheek to 'throw it away' ;-) I'll grab it and rewrite it myself thank you very much! *fake indignance*.

Anyways, please do rewrite it (or let me ;-).

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "Ok, ok, I concede! I'll rewrite it once I have the chance. *And I thought I only had my characters to boss me around...*

(no offence taken, I'll be happy to rewrite it!)"
31 Dec 200345 Carolyn Anderson
*tear* thats so sad 8 but i like that there is still one left, keeping the stories alive. I wish i could give some helpful suggestions, but it looks perfect already to me 2

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "Oh, thanks for your too kind comments. Once the ticket system comes back online, though, there'll be a new version of this poem (just a few line changes - essentially the same meaning) if you want to come back then."
7 Feb 2004:-) Kaykamisch
A short story from the last dragon's POV WOULD be quite good I imagine 12 Lemme know when you have it!
The only part to this that seemed "off" to me was the first stanza...but after I got past that one, the rest had a relatively easy flow- not a "common" one, but still nice. I liked the way you described events as well, with the five riding abreast and...oh nevermind, I forget what I was thinking (thank you ADD and poor short term memory!).
Since I am "dragon-balistic" myself, though the definition isn't what you think (you'd have to read the comments to the poem to find it, under Jay's I think)...anyway, since I AM, then of course I appreciate ANY poem displaying dragons in a positive light 2 ~Kay

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "That short story about dragons is nothing more than a glimmer of an idea in my head at the moment, but I'll drop by and let you know if anything ever happens from it.

And you picked out the stanza that gave me the most trouble... that one stanza has gone through three rewrites I think and it still isn't very good, but it's slowly getting better I think. I'm a bit of a dragon fan myself too and figured they can't all be as bad as all the stories say.

Thanks for the comment."
13 Feb 2004:-) Robyn Petrik
So sad...somewhat similar to your poem about the extinction of elves. It does seem a little awkward in places, as someone's already pointed out. But I agree, a story from the last dragon would be pretty cool. Let in simmer in the pot, and see what cooks up (lame, I know)

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "This was the first poem I ever wrote for Elfwood so it was bound to have a few mistakes in it. It was, nonetheless, a learning experience.

I think I'm going to have to cave to popular pressure here - seeing as so many people are requesting it, I think a story version may be in the works."
17 Feb 2004:-) Gabs Béland
Very cool poem, very good idea 2 and its true, there are a few places where the words are a bit stretched, but eh, who cares, it sounds good anyways....I like the way it sounded...Like a story within a poem...Very well done 2

1 Ben Cameron replies: "And again the idea of the story surfaces... well - it's coming some time soon! Thanks for the praise!"
26 Feb 200445 Kaylorn
i like this alot it reflects what everyone thinks... that science is predominant in todays society but there are still those out there that beleive in a small kernel of magic still being in the world.... i like this alot 1

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "That was my main reason for writing this poem, to get that across. Call me romantic, but it's still nice believing a little bit of magic exists somewhere."
26 May 200445 James Hayward
Nicely done. I'm no poetry whizz, but that sat well with me. Nice idea and rhythm. One thing;
'The power of nature inherit in their hide' You mean inherent, right?

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "Me neither. I actually hated it till I began studying it in class this year, but that's slowly changing (my feelings towards it, not my skill).

I did indeed mean 'inherent'... thanks for pointing it out."
23 Oct 2005:-) Dan Shevock
Wonderful idea for a poem.

:-) Ben Cameron replies: "Thanks 2"
25 Mar 2006:-) Karolien V Burms
It's a very nice poem. And the idea is great but maybe it would be better if you would put some feelings of the dragon in it? but it's just a thought.
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'Guardian (poem)':
 • Created by: :-) Ben Cameron
 • Copyright: ©Ben Cameron. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Dragon, Guardian, Mythology
 • Categories: Dragons, Drakes, Wyverns, etc, Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc.
 • Views: 1210

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More by 'Ben Cameron':
The Song of the Elves (poem)
Tales From the Real World
Of Humans and Elves, Part 1
Of Humans and Elves, Prologue
Defence of Melchior
Of Humans and Elves, 11

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