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Brian ´Dulcet´ Bergstrom

"Regonian Light: Chapter 4" by Brian ´Dulcet´ Bergstrom

SF&F Picture 5 out of 17 by Brian ´Dulcet´ Bergstrom
 
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In this chapter....well, just read. lol
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    Barbank's long black hair, flew wildly in the wind as Sprint took off to the training ground. He had never scene such a wondrous view. The grass was green and plants grew everywhere. The air was fresh and new.
    Sprint took it easy on Barbank. He had still been uncomfortable flying at fast flights. But soon, Barbank urged him to take the faster ride up into the clouds. Sprint did so. A huge smile formed across his face as they flew above the clouds.
    Soon Barbank noticed Sprint was flying lower and lower. They were nearing their destination. The fresh ground came into view. Then Barbank noticed a big huge field of dirt from the distance. Sprint flew closer to that field of dirt.
    "Are we here?" he asked.
    Yes the bird said as they landed.
    Barbank jumped off the roc. In front of them was a stone hut. The door was wooden and it had a few worn spots all around it. The structure itself looked over a hundred years old. Around it was a gigantic fence. The fence surrounded the entire field of dirt.
    Inside, past the door and fence he could hear the clashing of swords. Barbank stepped closer, trying to see what he could hear. The sounds were not of anguish and terror as he often heard in the Dark Domain, but they were more pleasant in a way. Men did not get killed, they merely went through a drill of training to kill. Barbank wondered what this place could be like. He really liked it.
    He knocked on the door. By this time Sprint had suddenly vanished away. The scene was silent. Barbank knocked again, but there seemed to be no answer. He wondered if he could just go in. So he opened the door. It creaked, but then he entered.
    The room was bare. The only thing inside was a table and a few chairs. A fireplace was in the corner. The floors were dirty. It looked as if no one cleaned the place in ages. Barbank walked around it a bit to inspect it.
    The smell was awful. It smelt like the sweat of men. No doubt warriors had been in the room earlier, leaving their odor behind. Soon, a tall figure's shadow appeared in front of Barbank.
    "If you've come for training it started a week ago." said the old voice.
    Barbank said, "I've come here to learn of the Light. I want to know what it's all about. I'm already a fine warrior."
    "I highly doubt it if you know little of the Light. Where are you from?"
    Barbank thought for a moment. He was afraid to tell him the truth. If he told the man where he was really from it wouldn't be good. But then he realized there was no other path to take but the one in front of him.
    "Regonia, in the Dark Domain."
    There was silence for a moment. The old man had not known of anyone crossing the gate. This was definitely a first. He was curious as to why or how he managed to cross it.
    "Turn around. I want to see what you look like."
    Barbank did so. The old man looked into his eyes, examining him thoroughly. Barbank had long black hair which had a thin strip of white in it. The piece of white hair was to pass that he was older back in the Dark Domain. For people judged youth terribly. His attire was mostly black. With black cape, pants, boots, and shirt, the only other color was a band of fire from the bottom of his shirt. But obviously it wasn't really fire. It was imprinted onto the shirt. It gave him a very mysterious look to him. A sword and dagger were at his side under his cape. A shield was also in back in case of emergencies. He looked very strong and handsome. Barbank's eyes then fixed on the old man.
    The man had on a blue robe. He was quite tall and had a very long white beard. His head was covered by a wizard's hat. I his hand he held a cane. There was a slight hump on his back. Not anything anyone would notice, but bad enough to need a cane for it. It seemed that the cane also served as a staff for the wizard. Near the handle there was a shiny red gem. It was one of the first things Barbank noticed about him. The man himself, though, had a very curious look on his face. He wondered why.
    "You surely don't look like one that would want to know of the Light." said the wizard after a long examination.
    Barbank said, "Well I do. I've fought for years to actually get a place in society and the Dark has gotten me no where. How soon can you train me?"
    The wizard thought for a moment. A rare case this was, he thought. He wondered what would happen if he did start training now. It wasn't everyday you get an opportunity like it.
    "You can start by morning. But come. Let me take you to a spare room. You look like you need some rest."
    "No, I want to begin learning now. I'm very eager to learn. Please train me now of the Light."
    The wizard sighed, "You are eager, aren't you?" He motioned for Barbank to follow him. "I can only say that the Warriors of Light only fight for justice and reason." Barbank nodded in agreement. "They fight for what is right. There really isn't a specific 'training' course to go through. You just have to fight from the heart and do your best. That's all we ask of you."
    "But what are those men outside training for then?" Barbank asked.
    "They are training for the war that's going on."
    "War? What war?"
    "The war with 76." replied the wizard. "It's brutal battle."
    "Can I join?" Barbank asked, excitedly.
    The wizard shook his head. "I doubt it. General Parker will have to see you about that. He commands the Army of Light. It is not up to me to send you in."
    "Where can I speak to him?"
    "He's out in the battlegrounds hiding. I doubt you'd find him. I wouldn't recommend trying either. You could be killed."
    "What is 76?"
    "76 is an evil man. He used to be one of my students. A very fine one indeed. He could've been one of the best Light warriors ever. But then he found an evil vision. The vision took over his mind and life. He now pursues to take over the whole Light Realm. When he does so he believes he will be able to cross the gate and meet with the Dark Realm or whatever it's called and make a gigantic evil world ruled under him. He wants everyone to live equally."
    "Equally? How can Darkness live equally? It's impossible."
    "I know," the wizard said, taking off his wizard's hat. "but the Dark is more complicated than you think. 76 has ways of dealing with people like you wouldn't imagine. He recruits peasants off the streets to work for him. He promises them money, but never pays. He's a tyrant."
    "Why is he called 76?"
    "The name is a long story. His name was given to him after how many men he killed in the great War of Clar.  Those 76 men were the Light's finest. The only survivor that was a good warrior was the great Mike Parker. He now commands the Army in those 76 names. 76 was so proud to have defeated the Light Army he decided to name himself after his greatest accomplishment. Kind of corny, I know. But that's the way it is."
    "What's your name?" Barbank asked, wondering who the stranger he had met was.
    "Wizard Swoom Jillon 'de Caru, but you can just call me Wizard Swoom. Most do."
    Barbank's eyes lit up. "You were the person Kluke told me to see!"
    Swoom's face twisted in confusion. He hadn't heard the name Kluke in ages. He wondered how Barbank knew the name. "How do you know that name?"
    "It was a giant statue Sprint took me to after I crossed the gate."
    "That's impossible. Sprint's on the war hunt with General Parker." He paused for a moment. "You actually spoke with Kluke?"
    "Yes, I told him my whole story. He told me to go see you. So Sprint took me here."
    "I don't believe it. What else did Kluke tell you?" The wizard had astonished. No one, not even him could get the statue to respond to anything. He thought Barbank must have had some sort of key or something.
    "He told me he was the one that founded Clar. I asked him would be able to help me and he said, the Keeper might, but he only keeps records of the past."
    "The Keeper? Now I am convinced. I must go see Kluke with you to see this for myself. Your story is unbelievable, but the names you speak of tell me you're telling the truth. Come." The wizard ran out and grabbed two horses for them to ride on.
    They rode for quite a ways. Sprint's flight had given Barbank the impression it wasn't that far away as it was. But it was far. They eventually made it within a few days.
    "How did you wake Kluke?" Swoom asked, getting off his horse.
    "I said the Spell of Clar. That seemed to do the trick."
    "The Spell of Clar? How did you know that?"
    "It was written on the door to the Hall of Clar in big letters."
    "Written? For any eyes to see?"
    "Well, I know I saw it."
    They walked the steps to the statue. It had not moved position from when Swoom last saw it. It was still as stone. Swoom looked over on the door and saw no writing. It was a mystery. How could a young warrior of the Dark be allowed to see the Spell of Clar? How was he able to awaken the statue?
    "Recite it."
    "Kluke of Day. Kluke of Night; Bring Kluke into the Light!"
    Just then the statue began to glow. Swoom's eyes were wider than the greatest valley. The glow soon diminished and the stature started to show signs of breathing. Then the statue spoke.
    "BARBANK! HOW GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN. I SEE YOU HAVE BROUGHT OVER SWOOM WITH YOU."
    "Yes," Barbank explained, "He wanted to see if I spoke with you before or not."
    At this point Swoom is frozen in shock. Never had he seen such a sight. Now he was sure of it. The boy had a special gift, he just didn't know what it was. He bowed down and spoke.
    "Oh, Great Kluke. I am honored to be speaking with you. But why has this boy, one of the Dark, been able to speak with you?"
    "THIS BOY HAS A POWERFUL GIFT."
    "What gift may that be?"
    "A GIFT POWERFUL ENOUGH TO CROSS THE GATE AND AWAKE ME. I CONSIDER THAT PRETTY POWERFUL."
    "What are we to do with him?"
    "LET HIM FIGHT IN THE WAR."
    "Are you insane? 76 will slaghter the boy to bits! There's no way I could do that. I don't even know where Mike is!"
    "HE IS ABOUT TWENTY MILES EAST OF HERE WARDING OFF THE DARK ARMY. SEND BARBANK IN AND TELL PARKER THAT KLUKE SAID FOR HIM TO BE IN THE WAR AND FIGHT AS HEAD SOLDIER."
    "You must be kidding me. He's barely trained."
    "HE SHOWS ENOUGH POTENTIAL TO HAVE BEEN TRAINED ON HIS OWN. HE NEEDED NO TRAINING. HE IS A POWERFUL MAGE."
    "Yes, but we are doing well in the war and--"
    "LET HIM FIGHT!!!"
←- Regonian Light: Chapter 3 | Regonian Light: Chapter 5 -→

DateNameComment 
31 May 2001:-) Nina Roussakova
*does a first comment victory dance* Oh, now I want to know what happens next! I think this chapter is better than the previous ones. You did a discription of Barbank... for me? Barbank is a powerful mage? I didn't see that one coming. But he didn't know himself did he? I like Barbank's innocent curiosity. What happened to Rose? I liked Rose. Is she going to join him soon? I thought the 76 was a funny story. I don't think I would call myself a number or anything. Is Barbank going to meet the God of the Dark Domain? Or...what's her name? The lady who's the smoke of the candle? Oh and the Kluke, that's a cool idea as well. Is the wizard going to join Barbank? Or Rose? Or what? A better chapter, certainly. I'm going now... *is off to finish her 9th chapter*
Author's Response: Well, Nina, I'm glad you liked this chapter. Yes, Barbank will eventually become a very powerful war mage. As for Rose, you'll see what happens with her later. And Constance is the Prophetess of the Candle. She doesn't really "rule" anything. She just looks over it.
24 Nov 2001:-) Stephanie J. Walls
I think your improving...or you have been improving over time. I think this is one of your better chapters. I see you followed Ninas advice and put in descriptions of the characters. Bravo! I like it!
18 Jun 2002:-) Anastasia I-Morn-Gwathren
I like the ending. I think this one is definitely good. Interesting advancement of the plot and the characters are quite original too. Great job! 12
20 Jun 200245 M. Bechard
Wowerz. 76 sounds like quite the evil villain that everystory needs. Another beautifulyy written chapter, off I go to read more.

:-) Brian 'Dulcet' Bergstrom replies: "Oddly enough, this chapter is kinda good. no flaws from people yet...YET"
1 Aug 2003:-) Camilla 'Motone' Whitney
Muahahaha, I have discovered flaws. Not so many as in the last chapter, so I'll stick them here. 10

He had never *scene* such a wondrous view. –make that *seen*

The piece of white hair was to pass that he was older back in the Dark Domain. For people judged youth terribly. –Me being nitpicky about fragments. If you got rid of the “For” it would work, also if you combined the sentences.

It gave him a very mysterious look to him. –redundant. Remove first “him.”

*I* his hand he held a cane. –in, probably (blasted typos)

It wasn't everyday you get an opportunity like it. –I think “this” would make more sense in place it the second “it.” That might just be me, though.

I asked him would be able to help me –methinks you should insert a “who” between “him” and “would”

Please don't hate me.
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About 'Regonian Light: Chapter 4':
 • Status: OK
 • Created by: :-) Brian ´Dulcet´ Bergstrom
 • Copyright: ©Brian ´Dulcet´ Bergstrom. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Light, Darkness, Dark, Evil, Good, Warrior, Mage, Wizardry
 • Categories: Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc.
 • Views: 169


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Regonian Light: Chapter 3
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