Ok, so maybe not officially chapter 2...may eventually be combined with what I'm calling chapter 1 later on. But for now. Enjoy. :)
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An unearthly quiet came over the room, my own heartbeat the loudest sound
I could hear. Then as quickly as the silence came, it was shattered
by the crackling of energy, the breaking of stone, and a muffled scream.
I awoke with a start, nearly playing out that scream back in the real world.
I sat there in a cold sweat panting heavily. I collapsed backwards
onto the pillow again, my hand resting on my still very upset stomach.
“Damn you Eryk, I’ve never dreamt of a failed experiment before, your worrying
has done this to me you know...” I muttered to him as he lay sound asleep
next to me. I had to resist the urge to beat him awake with a pillow,
he’d only worry more if he had to see me before I could regain my composure
some. None of what I felt yesterday lessened as I had hoped, I still
felt extremely sick to my stomach, the large dinner I had helped a bit but
not as much as it should have for it to be simply hunger. To make matters
worse even after a full nights rest I still felt very drained, but I made
it through yesterday like this, I can do it again. I intended on making
today my first day back to class. Despite being in a coma not more
then a day ago, I couldn’t let a little nausea and exhaustion stop that.
Grumbling I got out of the bed, and found myself using a nearby shelf for
support as my vision blurred on me again and the room wavered. The
dizziness, I had forgotten all about the dizziness. I had hoped it
happened yesterday just because of how long I had been out, not used to being
on my feet and all. I stood there a good ten minutes before my head
cleared up enough to move, and even then I found myself almost stumbling
over things as I walked for nearly a half hour afterwards when it finally
pretty much cleared up. The worst of it had cleared up much faster
than yesterday at least so with luck it would diminish with time. Yesterday
I had Eryks help to walk when this happened, I almost wish he were awake
now, much as I hate to admit it I wouldn’t pass up the help now either.
I’ll really have to talk to the one of the teachers today, I’ve never been
particularly good at healing magic. I simply couldn’t wait for whatever
I’ve got to pass naturally. Hopefully they could help a bit, it wouldn’t
be another few weeks until the clerics returned.
Filching something to eat from his kitchen for breakfast, I made the trip
home alone, he only lived a short ways down the street. Then again
with the towns design, nearly everything was just a short ways down the street
from everything else. Eryk had done enough for me, he deserved the
rest. It was a decently uneventful trip at least, the usual hellos
I’d come to expect, a few comments from people saying I looked much better
today (a blatant lie but I had to give them credit for trying), at least
it wasn’t the bombardment of concern I got yesterday, most people seemed
content enough to see me alive and well that they left me pretty much alone
today. They also knew me well enough to know I disliked such displays
of concern to begin with. Annoyingly enough I found myself readjusting
the robe of his I was wearing a dozen times as I walked however. Just
the feel of it barely rubbing against my chest was unusually uncomfortable,
darn near painful actually. Eryk really needed to brush up on his first
aid badly if I’m still tender a day after removing his mummy wrappings..
I peered slowly in the door, looking and listening for any signs of movement
or nor. Slowly walking in I realized I was alone, good, last thing
I needed was an “I told you so.” from Merick. Of course, he didn’t
think my haphazard concoction would accomplish anything more then a glow.
Nonetheless level part a forest, surely he’d love to know how the hells I
pulled that one off. Come to think of it wish I did as well, I knew
I should have kept better notes, I had taken it for granted that I wasn’t
going to blast the room to rubble like that. Taking a quick detour
into the kitchen for something to nibble on, it seemed to be the only thing
that would calm my stomach a little, I wandered into my bedroom. It
was of course a mess, and quite dusty after all these weeks. Darn you
Merick you could have at least dusted a little while I was out. Come
to think of it, knowing him he hadn’t been home since then either.
With a sigh I started to cast a small cleaning spell, as I could feel the
energy of the spell gather something didn’t seem right about it, there wasn’t
much time to concern myself with it more as my own body decided to interrupt
the spell on me. Falling to my knees I felt my stomach lurch violently
on me, I barely scrambled to the bathroom in time. Slowly I got to
my feet a few minutes later after the extreme nausea passed (reverting to
the lesser, nagging nausea I’ve felt since yesterday.), seemed at least getting
up slowly helped stave off the waves of dizziness and sickness I felt if
I got up too quickly. Maybe in my weakened state that was just too
much, simple a spell as it was there were easier, so I decided to give one
of those a whirl. Again something about the energy just felt off.,
and again the same effect as it was reaching completion. Suddenly the
idea of getting a normal breakfast was very unappealing.
After having rinsed the taste of vomit from my mouth, again, I started some
water running for a bath and went back to my room. I tossed Eryk’s
robe over a nearby chair and just let myself flop onto my bed with
my arm outstretched. For the first time since I awoke yesterday I took
some time to simply lay quietly. I should have been getting dressed,
should have concerned myself with getting back to class. How was I
to do much of anything in my present condition, I couldn’t even cast a simple
spell? Besides being too sick to cast even the simplest of spells,
there was still something else that felt wrong with me. It had nagged
at me since yesterday, did the spell done something else to me after all?
Maybe it had actually worked, and I just don’t feel the power flow anymore
because its now a part of me. Until this illness passed though there
was no way to find out, and I wasn’t particularly in the mood to keep trying
until I got used to the extremely nauseating effect of using magic right
now.
There was also the scene at the ritual site that concerned me. It wasn’t
the destruction that got to me, it was what I saw when I looked where I was
found... I could see my hand shaking involuntarily as I recalled it
even vaguely, quickly I shook my head and dismissed the thoughts altogether,
there was enough to worry about I couldn’t concern myself with something
that happened nearly two months ago.
Getting up from bed I walked back into the bathroom and turned off the bath
water. With a long sigh of relief I let myself sink into the water,
nothing in this world felt better after a failed experiment then a warm bath.
After a good hour I dragged myself from the tub and went about getting dressed
for the day ahead. It would be good to get into my own clothing for
a change, much as I liked him Eryk had boring taste in clothing. Mine
was of course much better. An outfit which consisted of a skintight
dark purple, nearly black, bodysuit with sleeves (well, sleeve. My
robe was the only thing with both sleeves still on it.) ending in a little
ring which stretched over the middle finger, it was usually all but hidden
under my robe with the exception of the part that stretched over my hand.
I didn’t like wearing pants and a shirt under my robe because that was just
plain uncomfortable, nor did I particularly like wearing nothing, so it was
the next best thing and fashionable to boot. It did however hurt to
get on this time, at least once it was over my chest and all it wasn’t going
to move around on me, so the robe should be tolerable. My robe of course
was just as good, a dark blue trimmed in a light purple color much akin to
my eyes, just without that slight glow they seemed to have. Enchanted
by me so I could modify the color any time I felt like, even if blue/purple
were my favorite colors, I couldn’t keep the same color all the time.
I switched between many different shades of them. Tying my hair in
a pony tail I looked myself over in the mirror, at least I didn’t look too
bad. Should be able to make it through classes and such today without
any major problems, I dreaded the amount of work I’d have to make up for
though for the weeks missed.
I was in good spirits as I left the house towards the academy. That
mood was shot after I received my schedule and saw the first class I had
scheduled for the day was Magical Safety. They apparently knew me well
enough by now to know I’d be back as soon as possible. I really should
have expected this, they did it to me every other time I seriously hurt myself
in an experiment why would this one be any different. I’d so much rather
this be a history class, always liked learning about the ancients and such...or
alchemy, heck even a class I’d have to cast something would be preferable,
and I can’t even cast anything right now! But no, my first class of
the day will be wasted with that bastard Thern.
“Ahh Elryn, glad to have you back with us, however late as you may be.” Was
the first thing I heard when I walked into that class, and just my luck I
was a few minutes late too. “Just the student I was waiting for, would
you mind coming up here?” Mr Thern said in a low, dry, scratchy sounding
voice. It was the only voice anyone had ever heard him use, and the
kind of voice that you’d use around a campfire while telling stories to scare
little kids.
Well I knew where this was going to go, same place it went every other time
I wound up stuck in this class, thank the gods I only had to be here for
a little bit today. I’d swear he got some kind of perverse pleasure
out of making me an example for new students, or the few who haven’t heard
his tales of me already. I couldn’t help but wonder what he actually
taught his students before I arrived here. With a sigh I walked towards
the front of the class, a few familiar students snickering in the background
knowing as well as I did what I’m doing here and what to expect. More
then half the class however appeared to be new students, probably either
joined before my spell, or during the time I was out. Dammit, do they
purposely wait for me to screw something up before scheduling them to this?!
“Now Miss M’Len, would you mind holding out your arms?” He asked with a sarcastic
little grin on his face. If looks could kill I’d have shown him something
a lot more dangerous then screwing up a spell.
I clenched my fist, and by the expression on a few of the newer students
I wished I could have seen the look on my face. “Just get to the point
already.” I promptly snapped at him as I wheeled about and stared up
at him. “You do this crap to me every other time I’m in here, you know
it by heart by now, you don’t need me to stand up here and hold you hand
while you do it.” I told him in the most angered voice I think I’ve used
on someone in ages. The snickers from the students on his previous
comment stopped and the room just kind of went quiet, that sarcastic grin
on his face quickly disappeared. I blinked and looked around the room
before quickly taking me seat and remaining quiet the rest of the class.
I could not believe I had actually said that. Sure there were a lot
of things I thought and wished I could do to him, but to actually act on
one of them like that. What the heck was wrong with me today?
He coughed and cleared his throat before continuing with the lesson like
nothing had happened, guess he wasn’t used to a student telling him off like
that. Sure I’d get in trouble for it later though. His speech
started out as it usually did using the accident I lost my arm in as an example.
It always seemed to get the best reaction when the students could actually
see the lasting damage of a serious failure, and a lost arm was certainly
lasting enough for most peoples taste. Even I can admit that one was
a stupid mistake on my part, I took a risk I shouldn’t have and the energy
backlashed on me. That didn’t mean I wanted to hear about it time and
time again. The rest of the class consisted of various other things,
spell components that should never be mixed, not to overexert yourself while
casting, things like that. Most of which were pretty much common sense
anyway. He of course used myself and a handful other people for examples
every chance he got, mostly me however as I was present, alive, and now even
higher on his hit list.
I was glad when that class was finally done and over with, I got a few comments
from a few of the students who were used to seeing me in there by now.
Seemingly everyone was surprised it had taken me this long to say something
to him, as if I didn’t feel ill enough as it was, this certainly wasn’t helping
matters. I proceeded to the next class quietly, not particularly in
the mood to talk to anyone at the moment but of course my little outburst
turned into the daily gossip. The rest of the day afterwards went pretty
decently all things considered. It took me a while to get caught up
to what it was we were doing in each of them, and of course there was a ton
of work I’d have to make up, but I expected that much. Despite the
first class and the large amount of work I was given though, I still had
fun, it was good to finally be back. Eryk hadn’t been in school all
day so I had assumed he just didn’t have classes today, he was probably off
somewhere practicing, likely annoyed I hadn’t even woken him up this morning.
After classes I promptly left the academies grounds, normally I’d have stuck
around and talked to people a little bit, but with what happened today and
how I felt I really preferred the privacy right now.
An hour of wandering around later I found myself at the hot springs, a huge
series of pools and little caves set into the hillside a mile or so from
town. While a relatively popular hangout for the townspeople, the place
was big enough, with enough pools and small caverns that privacy could be
found any time of day. To better help this several of the caves have
had small barrier stones set up around them over the years, not strong enough
to actually keep anyone out, but they obscure vision into the cave while
someone is inside so people outside know not to enter. I picked a small
pool near the bottom of the hill, I just didn’t have the energy to try to
reach one of the pools I usually preferred to rest in higher up. It
was a nice sized pool with a small cave attached to it, half the pool was
within the other without. Leaving my robe and books at the side I lowered
myself into the pool still in my suit, it was made to handle the water well
so it was at least comfortable to wear when wet. I just let myself
float outside for a while watching the clouds float overhead, various thoughts
running rampant through my mind before my senses faded into sleep.
I saw myself in the middle of my ritual room flooded with bright purple light.
Watching in slow motion as the walls around me crack. “Elryn?” The
glowing energy seemed to grow more intense the more the stone was compromised.
“...Elryn?” The dream faded and I snapped awake hearing my name again,
memories of it gradually drifting from my mind. Opening my eyes I look
around and spot someone sitting at the edge of the pool outside, apparently
I had drifted into the cave in my sleep. “Oh, hello Adel.” I
said halfheartedly, splashing water over my head in an attempt to wake myself
up.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” She responded apologetically.
“No don’t worry about it, I’ve got too much work to do to be sleeping.”
I couldn’t help but wonder what she had wanted, Adel was a nice girl but
she was usually shy to a fault. She was one of the few students at
the school training pretty much solely to become a healer, and aside from
the academies classes she recently started private lessons with Tyra last
year. Of course, she’s lived with Tyra for as long as anyone can remember,
so it wouldn’t surprise me if Tyra gave her bits of training over the years
but it was on a more official basis now. Interestingly enough she was
apparently one of the few people in town who could learn the talent Tyra
was particularly known for.
“Um, well, I...” She seemed to fumble for the words and played with the corner
of her shirt nervously.
“Oh no need to be so shy, its just us two here.” I told her with a soft chuckle
as I floated over towards her.
“Its just that, well, after what I heard happened I was wondering if you
were okay?” Her voice seemed to trail off as she asked and she lowered
her head as if embarrassed. Gods know I felt embarrassed enough just
having word of that stupid little stunt spread all around school. With
my luck its been twisted into several dozen different versions by now.
“Just what did you hear happen?” I asked her with an exasperated sigh.
“What happened between you and Mr Thern...its, not like you to do that...”
She sounded rather concerned as she said that, it was odd since this was
by far not the worst thing that has happened to me. What was it about
this incident that suddenly brought out her concern? Its not like I’ve
never spoke with her before of course, she was usually present when I’d go
talk with Tyra. Those were the only times I could really speak with
her though, she was always so distant outside that house.
“No I guess not, I’ve had a cold or something, seems to have put me on edge
a bit.” I finally told her after a few moments. “You haven’t seen Tyra yet
today, have you? I really need to talk to her about this.” My
mood had gone from annoyed about this illness to somewhat concerned now,
the symptoms only seemed to grow worse as the day went on. For as starving
as I was yesterday and this morning, I couldn’t even bring myself to look
at food right now, the thought alone was sickening.
She looked down at herself with an odd look on her face as she gently rubbed
her belly. Shaking her head a moment she finally responded. “Tyra?
She’s out today gathering herbs...she should be back by late this evening.”
She stated as she fiddled with a bit of her hair nervously. “Could I?”
She asked quietly.
“Hm?”
“Uh...I...I could try to heal you, Tyra has been training me you know.”
I ducked back as she reached for my shoulder. “Oh...if you don’t...” She
said quietly as she pulled her hand back.
“No its not that, but Tyras taught you in that whole empathic thing she does
hasn’t she?” She nodded slowly. “You best stick to just the healing
then.” It was bad enough I had to go through this, I didn’t want to subject
poor Adel to it too.
She nodded as though she understood why, she already looked slightly ill
as it was and touching me would likely only worsen matters. I floated
over to the edge of the pool again and she held her hands over me, chanting
a healing spell. Closing my eyes I could feel the energy from the spell
flowing through me, it was a warm, strangely tingling sensation, healing
spells were always a rather unique feeling. The warmth of the spell
dissipated after a minute or so, oddly with no noticeable effect. “...Sorry,
it’s the best I can do without knowing where to channel it.” That would
be Tyra’s specialty, she had the ability to feel exactly what someone else
was feeling, emotionally and physically. It wasn’t always a pleasant
experience for her but it let her know exactly where the energy for the spell
needed to be channeled, this greatly enhanced the usually weak magical healing
spells. Clerical healing as a general rule were by far superior, her
ability put her almost on par with them, this is the primary reason the clerics
felt comfortable enough for all of them to leave town at once on occasions.
“Eh don’t worry about it, you’re still in training after all. I’ll
just talk to Tyra later.”
“O..Okay...I’m sorry...” She said quietly and apologetically, turning away
from me a bit.
“Really, don’t worry, I didn’t expect much without knowing where to channel.
I just don’t want to put you through what I’m feeling.” I replied trying
to reassure her, she was shy enough as it was I didn’t want to make her think
her training had been for nothing.
She gave me a small smile. “I’ll tell her you’re looking for her...
Hope you’re more yourself tomorrow Elryn.” She replied in the same
quiet tone she usually spoke in before turning and walking away without another
word. She seemed unusually on edge for some reason, not shy edgy...almost
like she was nervous about something. However much I didn’t want to
admit it though she was right, I really haven’t been feeling myself today.
With a sigh I resumed floating about the pool, I wondered where Eryk was.
That question was answered a few minutes later. As I lay on a small
submerged ledge I heard the sound of a shoe scrape against the rock.
Opening one eye I turned my head to see who it was this time, I didn’t even
pretend to hide how happy I was to see Eryk. Jumping out of the pool
I prepared to run at him, intent in diving at him and dragging him into the
pool with me. That moment of happiness made me forget how ill I’ve
felt all day, unfortunately those memories came rushing back as I instead
staggered forward a bit and collapse to my knees with a few select curses
muttered. I lay there a moment overwhelmed by the same symptoms I’ve
been feeling before he ran to my side, slowly helping me to my feet.
He looked ready to say something, but I didn’t give him a chance to before
hugging him. His constant worrying about me was sweet but it always
irritated me ever so slightly, yet today I couldn’t have been more glad for
it. I could feel my eyes begin to tear up...I was on the verge of crying
and I didn’t even know why, I just couldn’t stop myself.
“I was wondering when you were going to show up.” I said as I let go of him
and leaned on the cave wall before I burst into tears altogether, I was sure
he’d never notice what little was there now, it just blended into the water
I was still soaked with. “Did Adel tell you where to find me?”
I asked curiously, knowing she left only a short bit ago.
“In a way. She also mentioned you weren’t quite feeling yourself today.”
I knew I should have asked her not to mention that to anyone.
“Oh yes...that.” I responded quietly, positive I knew what he was talking
about. I also realized it wouldn’t have mattered if I asked Adel not
to tell anyone or not, surely the whole town knew by now. It didn’t
exactly take a genius to realize I’d never dealt with my problems quite that
bluntly before, most especially not with a teacher. “I didn’t even
say much, sure everyone’s exaggerated it out to sound like I tore him a new
one, haven’t they?”
With a chuckle he nodded. “Give it a few days and there’ll be something else
for people to talk about....” He was probably right, its only
the most recent gossip, there would be something else silly they’d be talking
about soon enough. That didn’t mean I couldn’t be angry about it while it
was still recent though. “But, that wasn’t quite what I meant, aside
from that being so vastly unlike you...Adel mentioned you weren’t feeling
well too.” He asked me with renewed concern in his voice. Now that,
that was something I should have told Adel not to talk about.
“Oh... Say, did she seem okay to you? She was unusually nervous
when she came to talk to me.” I asked him, not only curious about her
but in an attempt to hopefully steer the subject off of myself.
“She seemed just fine to me for the most part. Although I do need to
ask Tyra something...speaking of, I’m taking you to see her later like it
or not.” He stated as if to say ‘you’ve got no say in the matter’.
“Oh alright, if it’ll get you to stop worrying so much I will.” I responded
with a grumble, trying to sound more annoyed then I was. I was planning
on going to see her anyway, but I’m sure he’d feel better if he thought it
was him that talked me into it. “But-” I quickly added.
“Not tonight, I really just want to go home and sleep right now. We
can go in the morning.” I had wanted to go tonight actually, but I
was dead tired by now. And truth be told, whatever Tyra had to say
about this illness, I was sure I’d be much more receptive to it in the morning.
I was so tired right now I don’t think I’d be able to concentrate on much
of anything by time we got there.
“Fine, but if you don’t I’m dragging you out of bed and carrying you there
if I have to.” He added with a grin, folding his arms across his chest.
An obvious attempt to make himself look demanding, I could let him get away
with letting him think he somehow talked me into going to see Tyra, but I
couldn’t just stand here and take this.
“Yeah yeah, now come on its getting late and I’m tired...” I simply stated.
Then with a wicked little grin on my face I casually added. “And be careful,
the stones slippery.”
Not even thinking he looked down at the cave floor. Tsk tsk, all that
worrying had made him careless. With a laugh I took a quick step forward
and pushed, a look of surprise crossed his face as he tumbled into the pool
and flailed about for a moment. I walked outside to gather up my robe
and the rest of my things, laughing the entire way.
The walk back to town was pretty much normal fare, us joking around and just
generally talking about a whole lot of nothing. He did however eventually
manage to worm some information out of me. Grudgingly I admitted that
I was sick with something. Told him it was most likely just a really
bad cold, which is most likely all it is. Just worse then usual because
I caught it in a severely weakened state, guess my body still hadn’t fully
recovered enough yet to fight off an illness as effectively. He offered
me dinner though which was nice of him...much as I hated to I had to decline,
just the mention of food was nauseating. To make matters worse I was
starving, and he’s such a good cook when he really wants to.
I practically collapsed onto my bed after arriving at Merick’s. He
stayed with me until I finally dozed off. I prayed Tyra would be able
to do something for me tomorrow.
***
I awoke with a yawn to an empty bed, I wished for a change Elryn would listen
to me when I told her she needed to rest. Apparently I was more tired
then I thought, it was already after noon by time I finally got out of bed.
Good thing I didn’t have classes today.
After a nice long shower I went about getting dressed for my practicing.
I couldn't believe she'd call my taste boring. Okay so it didn't stick
out as much as bright purple trim on dark blue robe (or whatever color she
had it that day) but many wizards wore just plain black robes, a white or
black shirt and black pants as well worked just fine underneath it.
To finish up the outfit was the addition of one of my swords. While
my main interest was magic, I had a thing for sword fighting as well, and
the class taught at the academy on it was perfect. Teaching one how
to not only fight effectively, but to use magic to improve every aspect of
it. I was provided with (well, shown how to make in most cases.) several
types. The sword that was the most fun was the one used for sparring
with a live opponents though, its primary property is its inability to actually
harm anything living. It'll cut into it, it’ll hurt like the hells,
but the wound will immediately heal upon withdrawing the sword. That
one the clerics had to make, magical healing just wouldn't have cut it, even
Tyra’s. The others were designed to modify their weight, the wielder
feels like they’re holding practically nothing at all. Speed, nothing
like taking several swings in the time it takes your opponent to unsheathe
their sword. And even one inscribed with amplification runes, Elryn
had been trying to get me to let her use that one for ages now.
After I was all dressed, sword at my side, I made my way into the kitchen
to grab something for breakfast. "Doesn't Merick ever feed you?" I
idly mumbled as I noticed Elryn finished off the last of the muffins I had
left. I'd have to pick up some more on my way to my training spot,
ah well, they tasted better freshly cooked any way.
Breakfast in hand I headed out towards the training area. It wasn't
much but a large outcropping of rocks, but with a blade that didn't dull
easily it didn't much matter what was used as a target. I practiced
my technique and magery for a good two hours before finally stopping, the
rock was only marred by a few scrapes and scorch marks. Unfortunately
I just couldn't concentrate on my swordplay today, Elryn had been on my mind
since I woke up. Sure she was awake now and claimed she way okay, but
she'd never been good at lying to me. I knew how annoyed it made her
to have anyone worrying over her but I couldn't help it, we've been friends
since we met and have been through nearly everything together. Sheathing
my sword I gradually made my way back towards town. Normally I'd have
trained well into the evening, but I just couldn't get her off my mind.
I reached town about a half hour after classes let out, she wasn't at home
or my house, so I figured she was still hanging out around the academy somewhere.
She usually did after classes, mostly we talked with a few of the other students,
set up practice sessions and such, or just had fun. The courtyard was
pretty empty by now, but there were still a few small groups of students
scattered here and there. Maybe one of them had-
"Hey Eryk! You missed it earlier!” Jaer shouted as he motioned
something to the people he was with quick and ran across the courtyard.
He was one of the newer students at the academy, joined only a few months
ago. The town didn’t have a whole lot of people so memorizing names
was relatively easy, I knew most everyone by heart now...but then, nearly
everyone knew everyone else by now.
“Really? Shame I didn’t have classes today, the fun stuff never happens
when I’m around. When did it happen? And what was it?”
As interested as I was, I couldn’t get the nagging thought out of my head
that Elryn was already causing trouble. Nah, it was probably just paranoia.
“During the magical safety class this morning-” That only added to my paranoia,
I was sure Elryn would get stuck in that class today. “-Thern apparently
took Elryn to the front of the class as usual-” Why was I at all not surprised,
I hated being right. “-and made some smart ass comment about her arm.
She just went off on him right then and there, it was great!” He said
with a laugh and a few random hand motions to emphasize his point.
“She did what?!” I asked him with more then a little surprise. That
little nagging voice in my head turned to concern now.
“Oh yeah, she finally snapped on him. It's a wonder it took her this
long, I've been wanting to...”
I sighed heavily. “Have you seen her around?” I cut in as I looked
about the courtyard again.
He thought for a moment. “Come to think of it, no, no one has.”
“Damn...what about Tyra, did she have a class today?”
He shook his head. “Nope, but that odd girl that lives with her...um, Adel
I think it was? She's still here, right over there, she may know where
she is.”
“Okay thanks!” I said as I ran across the courtyard, ignoring the puzzled
look he gave me before returning to the people he was talking to.
Tyra was one of the towns best non clerical healers, in some respects she
even rivaled their abilities. Adel was one of her few dedicated students,
meaning she practiced pretty much only healing. I was sure Tyra taught
her a few other little spells but in general healing was her forte.
She was also one of the few (only to my knowledge) townsfolk capable of learning
the power Tyra was so known for. She was a very pretty, but extremely
shy girl...rumor had it her empathic ability was actually much stronger then
even Tyra herself and that is why she stayed to herself so much. But
that was only a silly rumor, there were lots of those floating around town.
She only had a few friends but in general seemed to distance herself from
even them.
Adel got to her feet and turned towards me as I approached, giving me a shy
little smile. “Good afternoon Eryk.”
“Hello Adel. I hate to bother you, but...” I inadvertently averted
my eyes as her gaze met mine.
“Oh no bother...” She cut in quietly.
“Um, I’m not quiet sure how to ask this... But, have you seen Elryn
today? Did she seem okay to you?” I couldn’t quite think of the
right way to ask what I wanted. It felt wrong to just come right out
and ask ‘so what was on her mind?’ I knew that much like Tyra she could
pick up on emotions, but I didn’t know to what extent.
Adel thought for a moment before quietly responding. “...I saw her, right
after Thern’s class... She seemed embarrassed but tried to hide it.”
I let out another sigh as I consider what she said, what I’ve heard so far
was just so unlike her. Wonder where she ran off to now, the island
was full of little spots she’d hide in when she wanted privacy.
“I think she was on her way to the springs...” Adel commented quietly out
of nowhere, blushing slightly as I gave her a confused look. “C..can
I help?”
It had always kind of creeped me out when she’d say things like that out
of the blue. Tyra had once told me you can tell a lot about what someone
is thinking by the emotions they were feeling. Yet if I didn’t know
better, I’d swear Adel could tell what I was thinking on occasion.
“Sure, that’d be great. I’m probably the last person she wants to see
right now. Thank you.” I gave her a warm smile which she returned
in kind before wheeling about quickly as though trying to hide it.
She didn’t say anything as we walked, which I guess didn’t particularly surprise
me. Adel never spoke much, and even when she did she spoke so quietly
it was sometimes hard to make out what she was saying. It was a shame
really, she had a pretty voice, and was quiet friendly once you got past
the shyness. Did I just hear her giggle? Ugh, now I’m hearing
things, you’re going to drive me crazy yet Elryn.
As we approached the springs Adel turned around and looked at me, her eyes
I could only assume followed the movements of her head. It was always
impossible to tell where she was looking at any given time because her eyes
were a solid white, no iris nor visible pupil, no signs of color period.
I hated to admit it, but I was visibly shaken the first time I saw them,
even years after I’ve known her they gave me the chills...but I could never
tell her that, I wouldn’t want to hurt her. She smiled and lowered
her gaze from me. One would think eyes like that would leave her blind
yet she seemed to be able to see as well as any sighted person on the island.
“Now...” I idly muttered as I looked over the hillside, dotted with little
pools and caverns. “If I remember right, she likes the top most pools.”
Adel simply shook her head.
“....No? You think she’s even still here?” I asked her curiously as
I looked over the hillside again, hoping Elryn didn’t wander off somewhere
else.
She stood for a moment, casually rocking back and forth on her heels before
finally stating. “Yes, she’s still here. Over there.” Adel pointed
to a small cave/pool set into the base of the hill.
I cocked my head in confusion. “How...?”
“Her emotions are loud.” She stated with a odd little smile.
I stood a moment rather confused, not entirely sure what it was she meant
by that. “Do you think, you’d be able to talk to her? She probably
doesn’t want to see me right now.”
“M..me?” Adel asked, apparently surprised for the first time today.
“No...I..I mean...I’d rather not.” She stammered, seemingly unsure
just what to say.
I knew how shy Adel was, it really wasn’t fair of me to ask her to do this
for me.
“No, I...I’ll do it...its just... Tyra hasn’t taught me that yet, and
Elryns emotions are so loud...erratic, right now....” She looked towards
the cave and began to rub her hands together nervously, but without another
word began walking over.
“Wait Adel, what do you mean?” I called after her, but she didn’t so much
as look back, she seemed quite intent on going for some reason. I’ll
have to talk to Tyra when I see her next, something about how Adel said that
had me troubled, not just for Elryn, but for her now as well.
I paced around outside nervously for a short while. Luckily it was
only about ten minutes before I saw Adel walking back towards me, she seemed
to be having a bit of trouble walking straight and was holding a hand to
her stomach.
“Adel, are you okay? What happened?” I asked as I ran up to her,
letting her use me to help her walk. I hope Elryn didn’t do something,
if she was really in that bad a mood and not herself...
Adel slowly shook her head. “I’m fine...just, tired...Elryn didn’t
mean to do anything.” She responded reassuringly.
I helped her over to a tree and we both sat down next to it, she looked like
she needed the rest right now. “What do you mean didn’t mean to?
What did she do? What’s wrong?” I probably sounded frantic as
I asked but I couldn’t help it.
“You worry too much.” She responded with a playful smile, in a voice
eerily like Elryn’s.
“A...Adel?” I asked quietly and confused.
She blinked a few times and rubbed her head. “I..I’m sorry....strong emotions.
Elryn is okay, she’s just sick....it has her worried.”
“Do you know what? Could you do anything for her?” I questioned
her again, Elryn’s state seemed to take precedence over that of Adel, I didn’t
mean for it to, it just happened. I’ve known Elryn to only worry about
a few things, and I knew enough to know if she was it couldn’t just be something
small.
With a grin she just shook her head. “She wouldn’t let me touch her to find
out, it...it feels like just a cold though. I couldn’t do anything
for her, we’ll have to talk to Tyra.”
I was about to question how she knew what Elryn felt like without being allowed
to touch her, but I refrained from it, I had bothered her enough today.
All this thinking of Elryn I nearly forgot about how poor Adel was doing,
laying here next to me exhausted. “Thank you Adel.. But are you
all right?”
She nodded. “It was just harder then I thought, I’ll be fine.” With
that she slowly got to her feet again, looked down at me and smiled.
“I need to get back. Tyra will be back later this evening....”
A slight bow later and she was on her way back to town. Taking a moment
to turn around, she stated quite simply. “Elryn’s waiting for you,” before
heading off again. Adel had always been an odd girl in her own way,
but today was particularly strange in so many ways.
After all I had heard about her today the hug and happy attitude I received
from Elryn upon entering the cave was a very refreshing greeting. Here
I had feared the worst and she seemed to be generally okay now. We
talked for a short while before getting ready to head back to town.
The rather...wet, ending to our conversation helped to reinforce that feeling.
The walk back was decidedly uneventful. Elryn and myself were joking,
and just generally rambling most of the way back to town, even if she did
still feel sick at very least her mood was back to normal. She did
however finally break down and admit that there was indeed something wrong,
she figured pretty much as Adel did, it was just a cold. Irritating
enough to want to check with Tyra about it, but she assured me it really
wasn’t anything to worry about. She did decline dinner though, and
here I thought all that had happened with Adel earlier was strange.
I stayed with Elryn for a little after we arrived at Merick’s, unsurprisingly
enough she was out a few minutes after she hit the bed. With a small
smile I covered her with a blanked and gently kissed her forehead before
I left the house, nearly tripping over one of the dozens of piles of books
Merick had strewn about the floor. My next stop was Tyra’s place, she
lived a short ways from the western edge of town, a fair sized house set
partially into the forest. It was getting late so I shouldn’t stay
too long, I just wanted to make sure Adel was okay and check with Tyra on
a few things before heading off to bed myself.
The door opened a split second before I was about to knock. “Evening Eryk.”
Said Adel with a slight giggle at my reaction, I was needless to say not
expecting that.
“Oh, evening Adel. Is Tyra back yet?”
She nodded and motioned for me to enter. “Yep. She got back a bit ago.”
She said with a smile.
This was the first time I’ve ever visited Tyra while Adel was here as well,
I couldn’t help but notice how much more calm she seemed. She spoke
normally as well, not in the quiet tone I was so used to hearing her use.
“Tyra will be down in a minute, I told her you’d be coming.” Adel said
as she escorted me into the living room. “Where’s Elryn, I thought
she’d be with you?” She asked curiously, but oddly enough seemed to
rub her stomach slightly the way she was when she first left the cave, as
though remembering something.
“She was exhausted by time we got back to town, we’ll be over in the morning
though. I hope she sticks to her promise.”
“She will.” Adel replied with surprising finality. With a small grin
she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands.
Her eyes looked even more eerie in the dim candlelight then they did in broad
daylight. “Creepy aren’t they.” She casually stated out of nowhere
with a little smirk.
It was then I realized I was staring at her. I tore my gaze away and
shook my head. “No of course not, its just...well, they’re...” I fumbled
through the sentence trying to think of something to say so as not to offend
her. Darn it, nothing came to mind, they really were creepy to look
at, but how do you tell someone that without it sounding like a bad thing?
A smile crossed her face and she laughed.
“Okay that’s enough young lady, we have other things to discuss.” Came
a voice from behind me as Tyra circled around the chair I was in. She
was a tall woman, roughly my size actually, with long white hair. She’s
at least fifty years of age as far as anyone can tell, they just know how
long she’s been in the village and guessing at the age she was when she arrived.
Of course she wouldn’t say her real age, but her physical appearance seems
to support that number, give or take a few. Man she’d kill me if I
had said that out loud.
Adel laughed again, flashing me a knowing smile before turning to Tyra
“Aww...can’t I stay? I already know what you two are going to talk
about.” She said in a pouty yet childish little voice, she was clearly just
kidding around.
“No, now go clean your room or something.” Tyra said quite bluntly.
Adel looked prepared to say something when Tyra shot her a rather cold stare,
she just giggled and walked upstairs giving Tyra a small hug on the way by.
A broad smile crossed her face as Adel walked upstairs, seems she wasn’t
nearly as serious as she sounded.
I was of still rather surprised by all of this, it was so strange to see
Adel acting so open and playful.
Tyra took a seat in one of the chairs and winked at me. “If its any consolation,
even I have trouble looking into those eyes of hers at times.”
I looked at her with surprise, I hadn’t expected to hear Tyra herself say
something like that. “I just didn’t want to offend her...how can she
see anything out of those though?”
“No need to worry there, you wouldn’t have offended her. She realizes
others find them a bit on the strange side, she likes to have fun with that
fact too as I’m sure you just noticed. Although I’m quite honestly
not sure how she can see out of them, or just what it is she actually sees,
she's never told me.” Setting her cup of tea down she sighed, her smile
fading away. “But you didn’t come here to talk about her eyes, did you?”
The happiness faded from her voice as she asked that.
“No ma’am...I guess I was concerned about her earlier. She seems to
be doing fine now though.”
“You may have been right to be concerned...just what happened? She
won’t tell me more then a few minor details.” She asked as she folded
her hands in her lap, her voice heavy with concern.
“Well, what really had me worried was after she spoke with Elryn.”
Tyra frowned visibly when I mentioned Elryn’s name, but didn’t say anything.
“When she returned from the pool Elryn was hiding in she seemed to have trouble
walking, and appeared rather ill. When I asked her what was wrong she
just mentioned something about strong emotions. I hope Elryn didn’t
do something to her?”
Tyra just shook her head, picking up her cup and taking a sip of the contents.
(Mint tea it smelled like.) “In a way, she did...it was nothing Elryn
had any control over, don’t get me wrong. Elryn is....” She seemed
to think a moment, as though looking for the appropriate words to use.
“A very passionate girl, about almost anything she does. I’ve trained
myself to block out others emotions, and there are times even I can sense
her involuntarily.” She said with a small laugh.
I couldn’t help but join in her laugh, it was a strange thing to hear but
I honestly couldn’t say I was surprised by it. “But, earlier Adel seemed
like she was actually afraid to talk to her, does that have anything to do
with it?
She played with the cup a moment, swirling the contents about as she thought,
then nodded. “It does, she didn’t just seem scared I’m sorry to say,
she probably actually was. Adel’s strong...stronger then myself actually.”
She leaned forward with a grin. “Of course, we can’t have other people
knowing all this you know...” She stated, a playful pang to her voice.
“What? N, no of course not, I’d never think of telling anyone.”
She laughed as I fumbled through the sentence.
“Anyway, where was I... Oh yes. I occasionally involuntarily
pick up really strong emotions, such as from Elryn or on occasions other
people as well, but I’ve trained myself to block them out for the most part.
Adel hasn’t been able to do that yet... The emotions of those here
in town create a terrible noise in her mind. She can even pick up surface
thoughts of people nearby if they’re strong enough or she’s close enough
to them....she’s learned to control that though luckily.” She frowned
and let out another sigh, all this was obviously something that troubled
her deeply. “That’s why she remains so quiet and distant, getting close
only means more noise to her. I can shield her at home though, which
leaves her free to act as she normally would as I’m sure you’ve noticed.
But unless I’m with her outside, there’s nothing I can do for her.”
“Oh...I never realized, I’m sorry.” I said apologetically, now feeling
even worse about having used her earlier to talk to Elryn instead of myself.
“Don’t be, there’s nothing you could do anyway. She has trusted you
enough to tell you what she can do, or we wouldn’t even be having this discussion.
She has a hard enough time outside this house without people knowing what
she can do, you’re the first one beside me she’s actually told.” She
seemed to think a moment. “Although, I suspect Elryn may know as well....”
She added quietly.
“I won’t tell a soul... But I don’t know if you should be saying all
this, she didn’t really tell me...”
“Sure she did, she just didn’t come right out and say it. Probably
did the same to you as she did to me... Answering questions you hadn’t
yet asked, responding to comments you were only thinking, little things like
that, you probably barely gave it a second thought at first.” Come
to think of it she was right, they seemed odd at the time but that was it,
I was too concerned with Elryn to even think about it much. The more
I thought about it the more little things came to me, she had done the same
things to me in the past, but as Tyra said I didn’t even pay them any heed.
Sure there were rumors that said as much but that was all they were, no one
really thought about them much. “Oh dear, here I am going on about
her and I completely forgot about what you originally mentioned. You
said she seemed afraid to talk to Elryn, saying something about strong emotions?
The thing is, she was afraid. Really strong emotion like Elryn is feeling
right now can be almost painful at close range if not filtered out, and can
actually begin to affect the person sensing them.”
Had I known that I’d have never asked Adel to talk to her. It stuck
in my mind how she acted when she left the cave. Adel had an ill look
to her, and the way she told me not to worry...the tone, the voice, it sounded
almost exactly like Elryn. “Gods, I’m sorry... I..” I started
to say quietly and apologetically.
“I told you not to let it bother you.” She cut in quite sternly. “She
wouldn’t have done it if she didn’t want to, she wanted to help, and was
curious. Elryn’s emotions right now are particularly strong, and unusually
erratic.” She replied, taking another sip of her tea and setting the
cup down on the table.
I chuckled a bit. “Well that’s understandable, Elryn is a very erratic
girl at times...”
Tyra shook her head. “Not emotionally she isn’t. Her actions may be,
but her emotions are usually calm and clear. They’ve been all over
the place since she awoke, more so today then yesterday. I’ve never
felt anything quite like it actually, it may be somehow related to whatever
illness she’s caught.”
I remained silent for a minute. That would certainly explain what happened
with Thern at least, it of course by no means put my mind at ease, if anything
I worried for her more now then before. “She seemed fine on the way
home though, just like her old self again.” I added hopefully, maybe
she was feeling better after her rest.
Tyra flashed a knowing grin. “Even with whatever is happening to her,
she’s always behaved herself around you, haven’t you noticed?”
“Yes, I guess I have by now. She just does whatever she can so I don’t
end up worrying more about her. I don’t even know why I worry as much
as I do about her, its not like she hasn’t taken care of herself well enough
for who knows how long.”
She let out what I can only call an exasperated sigh. “You’ll figure
it out sooner or later.”
Now what did she mean by that? I glanced out the window and noticed
it was nearly pitch black outside, just the light of the moons and the occasional
sphere was visible, I was here a lot longer then I had intended to be.
“Well I’ve taken enough of your time, and its getting late. I really
should be going now, I’m just glad to see Adel’s okay, I’ll keep what you
said in mind. Thank you.”
Tyra stood up and walked me to the door. “She trusts you. If
you ever wish to talk, just stop by, it does my heart good to see someone
else showing concern for my Adel...” She added with a smile.
She had always told people she was available just to talk anyways, and most
people took her up on that offer occasionally. I don’t think many people
talked to her about Adel though, she’s never around when Tyra had visitors,
which all but added to my surprise when she answered the door.
“I may just take you up on that. Well, good night. Elryn and
myself should be back sometime tomorrow morning.” With a smile and
a wave we bid each other good night and I headed back towards home.
The moons hung high in the sky, it was a completely clear and beautiful night
out. We’d occasionally spent hours at night just up in the hills watching
the sky in silence, I hoped she’d get better soon, I’ve missed those nights.
I slept peacefully, while still worried for Elryn the promise she’d see Tyra
in the morning put my mind, if even only a little, at ease. The stuff
Tyra told me about Elryn’s emotions really bugged me though, I didn’t even
entirely understand it and it still troubled me. It was as well odd
to hear all that about Adel, sure I’ve heard all the rumors, but up until
tonight that was all they were. I wondered what surprises awaited me
tomorrow, maybe I’m really the long lost heir to a powerful kingdom, or Elryn
the daughter of some powerful mage somewhere.
| Date | Name | Comment | | | 11 Oct 2002 | Stephan P. Calloway | Loading...I totally agree - in my own writing the "chapters" are really more breaks within a chapter, as I rewrite I find I am combining many into a single chapter... I like where this is going too! Brian D. Saul replies: "Glad ye like it thus far, hopefuly future installments can keep up the pace and interest.  I've considered breaking it up to shorten the chapters a bit. But in the end I think whats truly keeping me from is because I know its turning out to be a 'very' long story." | |
| 11 Oct 2002 | Debra Lynn Turpin | Loading...This 'chapter' is better. The overlapping is minimal, giving the reader more information. I'll be back to see how this is going. I like what I've read. Brian D. Saul replies: "Guess trying to split it into chapters doesn't work, its just that its so long as is I'm still unsure just how to split it actually. This is likely how I'll try to keep things. Such short bits of perspective change like I used in the first probably won't be happening too often (if at all) from this point on. Thank you. " | |
| 13 Oct 2002 | Frances Monro | Loading...I enjoyed this. I could feel the characters getting deeper by the minute. Wouldn't it be amusing if Elryn should find out that Eryk has been spending time in Adel's company and jump to the right(?) conclusion? Write more! Brian D. Saul replies: "*grins* Ahh the things I've got in mind, but I wouldn't want to spoil any of it now, would I. 
As for more...patience young grasshopper.  Chapter 3 is actually nearly complete. But be warned, its going to be LONG....its turning out so far to be longer then even this chapter. Which has me somewhat worried, as I've got a nice bit more to go yet and at this rate I'll be forced to split it into 2 pieces. :\" | |
| 17 Oct 2002 | Leanne 'phlurp' Fitzpatrick | Loading...yo yo me lovely. hmm...what to say, what to say.... well, for a start, you have a way with cliffhangers. i couldnt believe it when it ended! *meanie* lol. again, the story told from the different perspectives was good, and the development of the characters was cool. (are elryn, eryc and adel gonna have a lil love triangle?)- methinks that elryn and eryc should get together, they have to. its the law  *that or i get eryc, cos he's really nice. its good to find a lead male character who isnt afraid to cry.* keep up the great work, i cant wait to read more of this. WRITE DAMN YOU!!! *slaps herself to stop from threatening* Brian D. Saul replies: "lol, and to think I wasn't even trying for a cliffhanger feel....just wait till I am. *evil grin* I however can't give any details about Adel...she's the creepy mysterious girl of the moment and all, so it'd be just wrong to tell you anything about her. You'll just have to read and find out.  You however are free to have Eryk, but you'll have to fight Elryn for him.  As for more...you should be quite pleased to know that chapter 3 is already in the queue so should be up soon I hope. I'm also a decent way into chapter 4, but no estimate on time...because if I give a time I think it'll be done, I'll never meet the deadline (Its a law of nature itself you know, deadlines are made to be broken.) Thanks for the comments. =)" | |
| 19 Nov 2002 | Kevin C. Morris | Loading...I agree, this chapter's a bit better in regards to the overlapping. The break was slightly confusing at first, but it didn't take long to see what was going on. It's coming along well, Brian. ^_^ Brian D. Saul replies: "Yeah, figured this style of overlapping was much better then what I did in the first chapter...or at least, easier for me to write. Anyways, thanks.. " | |
| 30 Jan 2003 | Alice Muffin Girl Smith | Loading...*crawls onto comment screen, battered and bruised from the beating a malicious typo gang gave her while she read this* The pain… *glances down at herself* Oh. I guess that explains it. They took me liver, they did. *blink blink* *passes out* “Oh... Did she seem ok to you? She was unusually nervous when she came to talk to me.” *I* asked her curiously. <= out of all of the typos, this one is the worst. You actually confuse your own characters…. this is Elryn speaking, but you say ‘I’ meaning Eryk… baaaaad boy. *would threaten you with either her ruler or the Muffin Lance, but is currently quite unconscious* Yeah, but actual comment: I love Adel’s playfulness as she unceremoniously eavesdrops on Eryk’s thoughts… she’s just a cutie! A great idea for a charceter, she is –in all respects. The empathy thingie is real cool, especially in the way it makes her act around town versus at home. Eryk’s utter hopeless ignorance is simply adorable. *grins and huggles Eryk* Oh yeah, he’ll figure it out sooner or later… Hmm… I run off now to read the next part. Just as soon as I wake up. If it’s not too much trouble, could you stop those vultures from feasting upon my bloody body? Thanks. You’re a dear. *candidly goes back to being unconscious* Brian D. Saul replies: "Erm, yes, more typos...I'm gradually fixing them, really I am... ^^
Eep, wonder how I missed that one. It's actually a nasty remnant of the way I write the scenes that overlap like that. I just kinda copy the previous part, paste it, and rework it to match Elryn/Eryk's perspective. Tis fixed now, and will be redone actually since I'm redoing the way the scene overlapping is handled altogether.
Really like Adel myself, she was to be a last minute temporary addition, but I've grown to quite like her. =)
Ahh but see, that's why there's a healer in this chapter, so readers don't go to the next after my typos have run rampant. Careful in the next one...want you to survive till the end. " | |
| 10 Jan 2004 | Matthew T. Summers | Loading...First a couple of edits (had to reread the first chapter to get back into it. lol...) * With a sigh I started to cast a small cleaning spell, as I could feel the energy of the spell gather something didn’t seem right about it, there wasn’t much time to concern myself with it more as my own body decided to interrupt the spell on me.... this is quite the sentence. you might want to cut it into a few sentences. * actually, there's a bunch of sentences that could be trimmed down. I have the same problem, I have to force myself to stop sentences.. might take a good edit or two. * I'm the first commentor on this chapter in almost a year?!? a shame, 'tis a very good read.  On to the next if time permits me to do so... If not, drop me another comment in a week or two, and I'll make another effort. Darn you Time! Comment from Old Man Time {Whistles innocently} >Matt Brian D. Saul replies: "Eep! My that is much longer than I intended it to be I'm sure...I wish I knew how things like that kept eluding me, I've went over and edited this thing a dozen times over now. New errors and little things seem to pop up every time too. But yes, as you pointed out tis a problem indeed...kinda inherent in my style I guess, and one I really am going to have to start paying more attention to. ^^ Too often I miss them after the fact.
And yes...tis kinda depressing, isn't it. I hadn't noticed it had been that long until you said something...meanie. *sniffles* Then again, would help if I made an effort to wander around and read more peoples work too, comment, and generally make myself more known. ...Maybe I should take lessons from Muffin, she's great at this kinda thing, hmm...." | |
| 4 Feb 2004 | Clarion | Loading...P.S. Try splitting his perspective in two parts, before and after her part, so there is no flash back. That confused me at first. Under standing the transition is mainly done in hindsight. May want to add dialogue to let people know when perspective changes. "Hey, Eryk," Elryn said. I smiled... Brian D. Saul replies: "hmm yeah that's been one main point people keep mentioning, tis a 'lot' better than it was when I first posted it, but I know it still needs a fair amount of work. Will keep that suggestion in mind though when I go back to work on fixing it." | |
| 4 Feb 2004 | Clarion | Loading...Love it. Forgot what I was going to say... Oh, yeah. Typos more apparent here. Maybe I was looking for them this time. Reread it slowly!! (Yes, I know it is hard rereading your own pieces, slowly, when you know what happens next. I am having the same problem.) You can catch little things like n's left in the middle of a sentence (I think it was supposed to be a no or not.) or other random typos. Don't you wish this thing had spell check? (or does it?... I don't know.) Typos made me stop and think a couple of times, but I need to use my brain more. *camera pans to picture of walnut on stick in middle of a dusty library- my head* Keep up the good work! Love it! *Army of typos gather silently in dark, utter war cry, charge, and chase me to next chapter* Brian D. Saul replies: "Rereading actually isn't much of a problem for me, I've done it at least a dozen times with this though and they seem to keep slipping through. Course that's likely cause it's my own and probably just glaze over them as I look. And they're not the kind of typos a spell checker can find anymore. :\ I'll give it another look before I post chapter 7, see how many more I can squish." | |
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