Elfwood is the worlds largest SciFi & Fantasy community.
- 119873 members, 8 online now.
- 23892 site visitors the last 24 hours.

User:		Password:
Not a member yet? Click here to join! (Help)

StartNew!Join UsPopularSciFi & Fantasy ArtStoriesTutorialsCommunityRulesAboutFindForum

Stories / Stories / Camilla ´Motone´ Whitney / Text 19 of 20 / News Flash: Snow White

"News Flash: Snow White" by Camilla ´Motone´ Whitney

SciFi/Fantasy text 19 out of 20 by Camilla ´Motone´ Whitney. ←Previous - Next→

Snow White, from a different perspective.

←- Rivalry in the Seas | Tortilla Girl and the Search for the Ultimate Hot -→

Newscaster 1, female

Newscaster 2, male

Sergeant Watson

Prince Henry

A Dwarf

The Queen

Newscaster 2: Hello, it’s August 20, and this is your morning news.

Newscaster 1: Suspicions have been confirmed that the fugitive Show White has been found hiding out in the woods. Earlier this month, Snow White committed the royal charge of insulting her stepmother, the queen, and resisted arrest by running away. Immediate action was taken by sending out a search force and denouncing her title as princess. She has now been found under the care of seven dwarves.

CUT TO FILE TAPE OF SERGEANT WATSON

Sergeant: The dwarves refuse to release her into police custody. They are holding her and haven’t as yet declared a ransom.

CUT BACK TO NEWSROOM

Newscaster 2: When the queen was asked to make a statement, she simply said, “The next time Show White comes out of the cottage, she may as well be dead.” Analysts are currently working on this cryptic statement. But that’s not what her fiancé thinks.

CUT TO FILE TAPE OF PRINCE HENRY

Prince Henry: I don’t think Snow White committed a criminal act of any kind. All girls fight with their mothers and need time away from them.

CUT BACK TO NEWSROOM

Newscaster 2: And when asked of what he thought of her staying with seven males:

CUT BACK TO PRINCE HENRY

Prince Henry: Snow White isn’t a slut. Besides, she likes tall men.

PAUSE

Newscaster 1: Hello, it’s August 23 and this is your morning news. For nearly an entire month the nation watched on horrified, as the royal drama unfolded. But it all ended this morning when the dwarves released this statement:

CUT TO FILE TAPE OF DWARVES

Dwarf: Snow white is dead. We will avenge her death on the murderous villain.

CUT BACK TO NEWSROOM

Newscaster 2: We now go to exclusive interviews with the involved.

CUT BETWEEN FILE TAPES

Queen: I have no doubt that it was the dwarves her murdered her, just for spite, and then publicized that blasphemous statement.

Prince Henry: (sobs)

Dwarf: Of course we know who killed her! And we will have her BLOOD!

Queen: I wasn’t *planning* on giving her the death penalty when we got her back. But, I suppose, it’s none the worse.

Prince Henry: (sobbing) she was so beautiful…

Dwarf: Vengeance!

Prince Henry: ...such a nice person…

Queen: We all feel sorrow about this tragic incident.

Prince Henry: …she liked birds…

Dwarf: She told us her whole story! All about the queen and her mirror!

Queen: But she was, after all, a traitor.

Prince Henry: …and apples…

Dwarf: Oh, she was a devil, that queen! Why do think we all moved to the forest! Why do you think Snow White ran away?

Queen: Traitor!

Dwarf: She has a secret lair under the dungeon, that’s what Snow White told us. Where she brews all sorts of evil…

Prince Henry: Apples!

PAUSE

Newscaster 2: Good morning, it’s August 27, and this is your morning news. The story of Snow White has finally resolved, but with a rather enigmatic ending.

Newscaster 1: That’s right. The seven dwarves who were withholding Snow White have been arrested for treason and murder, and they won’t tell any authorities where they’ve hidden the body of Snow White.

Newscaster 2: Furthermore, Snow White’s former fiancé, Prince Henry, has disappeared from the kingdom. There have been unconfirmed rumors that he either returned to his own kingdom, went out in search of a new kingdom, or committed suicide over his fiancé’s death.

Newscaster 1: What are you doing? We’re supposed to be telling facts, not rumors!

Newscaster 2: Hey, I’m just trying to inform the watcher.

START FADING

Newscaster 1: Yeah, inform them with lies!

Newscaster 2: Well you’re always stealing my spotlight!

Newscaster 1: Obviously because you don’t know how to read news!

AND OUT

←- Rivalry in the Seas | Tortilla Girl and the Search for the Ultimate Hot -→

Date	Name	Comment
12 Sep 2003	Chris A Jackson	Loading... Love it!! ~.~ first comment jig This is sooo funny! I love parodys on fairy tales... Have you seen the miniseries "The Tenth Kingdom"? This reminded me sooo much of that! Keep writing the satire, and come visit! I've got new stuff up! Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "I saw part of 10 Kingdom. shrug Thanks. ^_^ I'll go check out your new stuff!"
13 Sep 2003	Charlie J. Mizer	Loading... Now that is some funny sh!*. You should do one about sleeping beauty, that one just begs of a parody! Later Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "Thanks! I thought it was interesting... I've actually done a Sleeping Beauty but it's more serious... It's crossed with Cinderella in the Truth Behind the Matter if you'd like to check it out. All I have up so far of it is the Cinderella section, though."
5 Oct 2003	John Teall	Loading... Can anyone say 'war on terrorism'? and the scarry part is he's our own mirror mad queen, i mean, well nevermind but since i do live in the u.s. not that anything is ever even THAT 'simple'. i don't know if your aligory was intentional, but it sure seems a lot like how some things over here look to me. =^^= .../\... Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "It wasn't intentional, mainly because this was written before the war on terrorism started. Long before. Still, it's a concept. ^_~"
5 Oct 2003	E. Hanna	Loading... Prince charming never struck me as particularly charming. At least Bashful had a personality. Good thing for the queen they weren't D&D dwarves or they'de have axed up the royal guard something fierce. Great concept : > Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "Seriously. I know a D&D dwarf who's absolutely insane like that. Of course, he's usually drunk. Coincidentally, his name's Black Jack. o.O"
14 Dec 2003	Kori De-Ann	Loading... Lol--this is cute! I like it, it's simple and pretty cut and dry. I think it would have been better if you had finished it to the point of which the original story ends. You know, the prince finds her blah blah blah--but, HEY! that's just my opinion. Otherwise, great work! Peace- Kori Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "The prince does find her and so forth, hence their disappearance. The media just doesn't know what's going on. As is usually the case with the media."
27 Jan 2004	Panu Karjalainen	Loading... Heh heh heh heh... Wait. Was that my cat who just puked? Oh. Just the stereo. Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "Sounds like you should get that thing fixed... ^_~"
27 Jan 2004	Jamie Herrington Gorton	Loading... Dwarf: Vengeance! Prince Henry: Apples! Man, wait to the ACLU gets ahold of you. I don't think the press can say "dwarf" anymore. Plus, they were portrayed as so bloodthirsty. J'aime. Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "Hahaha! They'll never catch me! runs away"
10 Jul 2004	Alice Muffin Girl Smith	Loading... grins That was funny... I loved the Prince. "She liked birds... and apples." ^_~ Wow... that's unproductive, ain't it? But what you got works. No complaints, no crits, no typos, no way. ^_^ This was a fun read, honey. Thank you. Camilla 'Motone' Whitney replies: "Thanks suga. Glad you liked it. I like it meself. I actually wrote it with the intention of filming it someday... can you say student film festival? Final Cut, here I come! Muahahaha!"