"Worlds Away Part Two" by Deborah Cullins Smith

                                                                                             WORLDS AWAY

                                                                                                     Part Two

                                                                                         by Deborah Cullins Smith




Caroline was summoned as the sun rose high over the castle.  Her sullen acquiescence to Lady Augustina bordered on insolence, and Angelica winced.  The Lady did not easily forgive the follies of rebellious young girls.  

“You will bring bread and wine to the chamber.  We desire refreshment,” the Lady demanded imperiously.

Caroline nodded a scowling acknowledgement and turned to leave.

“Young woman!” shrieked the Lady Augustina.  “Have you not been taught proper etiquette for my court?  You have not bowed before me.  You have not responded with obedience to my command.  You’ve turned your back to me!  You will come now and bow at my feet, you strumpet!”

Angelica felt her stomach turn to ice.  She still had much to learn about this world, but she was certain that any punishment Lady Augustina meted out would be far more stringent than a month’s grounding or confinement to her room.  

Please show the Lady respect, she begged silently.  Caroline, please…

Caroline turned to the Lady and approached, head held high, a sulky expression still creasing her young face.  Bowing before Augustina, Caroline bent her body, but every fiber of her young soul screamed her disdain.  Some things remained the same in every world, and children, caught between youth and adulthood, still resented those who bore authority.  But Lady Augustina obviously had far less patience with the follies of the young than Angelica ever had.  

“You will bring bread and wine to this chamber, and you will do it with all haste.  Do you understand me?”  Her voice was low and steely, and far more frightening than a scream could ever have been.

“Yes, my Lady,” Caroline muttered, careful to keep her head bowed, eyes to the floor.  She rose to her feet, feeling her mother’s eyes following her every movement, daring not to glance anywhere but down.  Slowly, she backed out of the room, then fled the chamber, footsteps echoing on the stone stairs.

“Your daughter seems to require a firm hand, Lady Angelica,” Augustina said in a frosty tone.  “You might want to give further instructions tonight – before she disgraces your household and your husband’s good name.”

“Of course, My Lady,” Angelica said softly, squeezing the words past the lump in her throat.  She, too, kept her eyes downcast.  Their lives might depend on this nasty woman’s good pleasure.

Eons passed as Angelica prayed that her daughter would return with all speed.  She could see Lady Augustina’s lips press more firmly into a hard, thin line with each minute that lapsed.  

“We may all die of parched throats before that lazy daughter of yours returns with refreshment, Lady Angelica,” the High Lady said bitterly.

There was no reply Angelica could give that would placate the woman, so she wisely said nothing.  She raised her eyes only once, pleadingly, and saw scorn in Lady Augustina’s face.  

Why does she hate Caroline so? she thought.  Eyes stinging, she felt her hands shake, and her needle slipped, biting into a finger.  A tiny droplet of blood welled up and Angelica pressed it between trembling lips, carefully protecting the precious purple cloth in her hands.   

Hurry, Caroline, hurry, she begged.

Caroline chose exactly that moment to arrive, carrying a platter of sliced bread and cheese in one hand and a large decanter of wine in the other.  Bowing her head and dropping a curtsey, the girl entered and placed the food on a low table in the center of the room.  Angelica watched her covertly and was relieved to see her attitude had undergone a radical change.  Perhaps the angry mistress had made an impression on the wayward child.  At any rate, her humility seemed to placate the woman slightly.

“You may go,” the Great Lady declared imperiously.  Caroline wasted no time in fleeing the room – after one more deep curtsey, that is.

After Lady Augustina had eaten her fill and downed two cups of the watered down wine – it would not do to appear at the Great Feast already plastered, it seemed – each lady was allowed a small cup of wine and one slice of bread and cheese.  Angelica feared that any food hitting her stomach might make an untimely and disgraceful reappearance, so she nibbled sparingly.  She glanced at Chantell, and noted with alarm that the girl seemed flushed.  She broke off a large portion of her bread and slipped it quietly into Chantell’s hand.  The girl gave her a timid smile and hastily consumed the extra food.  Now and then, her hand would slide over her distended stomach protectively.  Her time must be closer than Angelica had surmised.  

What have I gotten myself into?  Angelica thought in panic.  I have no idea how to deliver babies.  What am I going to do when she really does go into labor?  She hoped that Lilith would have a chance to instruct her on this phase of medieval life before Chantell’s time ran out.  Or that one of the other ladies would also be in attendance.  Perhaps she could bluff her way through if someone more adept was also at hand.

As the sunlight began to drift down the walls, the ladies were dismissed to attend to their families before the Great Feast.  Angelica helped Chantell to her room, then hurried next door, hoping for a moment alone to tend to her own personal needs.  Peeing into a chamber pot was going to be awkward enough without having to manage with an audience.  This issue of privacy was going to be her hardest hurdle, she decided.  

She wasn’t given quite as much solitude as she would have hoped for.  A moment or two after she had straightened her skirts again, Lilith appeared.  

“You’ve had an eventful first day, haven’t you?”  Lilith wore that gratingly amused smile.  “Is it everything you hoped for, my Godchild?”

“Not in the slightest,” Angelica said coldly.  “You know, you could have warned me last night.  Given me some inkling of what this would be like before tossing me in over my head.”

Lilith’s eyebrows arched and her smile held a hint of malice.  “My dear Angelica, you cannot blame me for your own careless wishes, based on Hollywood glamour instead of hard historical fact.  You should have educated yourself a little better before you romanticized this era.  They weren’t dubbed the “Dark Ages” without reason.”

“I may not have acted responsibly where my ‘wishes’ were concerned, but I had no idea that you would actually pitch me headlong into another time and place!  These things simply don’t happen.  Wishes are just that – wishes.  Not hard fact, delivered on the point of a sword.  I never believed for a minute that you would really send me into another century!  How could you do this to me, to my family?  What if that odious woman hurts my daughter?  Caroline is not accustomed to bending her will to another.  She can’t adapt to this lifestyle.”

“I told you, Angelica,” Lilith interrupted the tirade.  “As far as your family is concerned, this is their life.  They are more adept at handling its challenges than you evidently are.  You’re the one who needs to get a grip!  You wanted simplicity.  I gave you what you wanted.  So who’s acting like a rebellious child?  Caroline or you?”

Angelica shook with indignation and fear.  “I can’t handle this, Lilith,” she whispered.  “My daughter is liable to be beaten to death by the hideous woman, my son is taking weapons training, and I’m expected to help the girl in the next room when she gives birth.  What am I going to do?”

“You,” Lilith said, raising Angelica’s chin with a vise-like grip, “are going to prepare yourself for the great feast.  You are going to act every inch the lady I’ve made you.  You are going to spend your days sewing, like you wished.  You’ll please your husband when and where he demands.  You are going to accept the consequences of your own desires.  He really is a handsome man, Angelica.”  The woman’s eyes narrowed and an odd smile tugged at the corners of her full red lips.  “You’d better be careful, my dear, or some buxom little wench will catch his fancy.  You are easily replaced, you know.”

Then she vanished.

Angelica’s stomach lurched and she turned to wretch into the chamber pot.  She had replaced the lid and wiped her mouth with shaking hands when the door slammed open.  Caroline entered the room with an indignant flounce and flung herself across the bed.

“Caroline,” Angelica began.  She knew she would have to proceed with caution, or the angry child would dig herself in even deeper at the feast.  “You really must not antagonize Lady Augustina…”

“Don’t lecture me, Mother,” the girl snapped.  “I don’t need your sage words of advice.  I can manage on my own.”

Angelica’s temper flared.  “You will listen to me, young lady.  It’s not just your own life you’re risking here.  Our lives are hanging by threads, and Lady Augustina is holding a knife.  You made her incredibly angry today.  You will not do that again, do you hear me?”

A cold smile spread over Caroline’s features.  “I know what I’m doing, Mother, though sometimes I don’t think you do.  You just keep bowing and scraping to that awful shrew.  I have plans of my own.”

Angelica’s stomach turned to ice.  “Just what do you mean by that, Caroline?”

“Never mind, Mother,” she said, finger-combing her long curls.  “I have to get back to the kitchen.  I’m serving tonight.”  She pinched her own cheeks to heighten her color, straightened her bodice and smoothed her skirt with a determination unlike any Angelica had ever seen in her, then left the room without a backward glance.

“Oh, God….” Angelica murmured, closing her eyes.



Angelica entered the Great Hall on James’ arm, with Jeremy following a few steps behind.  The rank smell was covered by the scent of fresh straw, but years of human waste and rotted food could not be so easily dispelled.  The stones themselves seemed to reek, though no one else appeared to notice.  Somehow, this was not the simplicity Angelica had envisioned.  The knights and their ladies made their way to long benches beside trestle tables, but no one sat until Sir Robert and Lady Augustina made a dramatic entrance.  Sir Robert smiled magnanimously, flirting with the ladies of the court as they proceeded across the spacious room.  Lady Augustina’s mood had obviously not improved since Angelica’s departure this afternoon with a weary Chantell, leaning on her arm.  Of course, Sir Robert’s lascivious eye probably had something to do with his wife’s sour demeanor, and Angelica felt her first stab of pity for the woman, who was growing icier with every step.  

When the Lord of the castle seated his wife with a flourish and took his own chair, the only two real wooden chairs in the room, the servants began the first parade of the evening with enormous serving dishes.  Angelica noticed that the first platters held huge round loaves of bread cut in half and hollowed out.  The men each took one of the half-loaves, while boasting wildly about their prowess on the practice fields that afternoon.  She was dismayed to see that none of the women were given these loaves, which obviously served as plates for the dishes yet to come.  Were they not allowed to eat?  With the next platters, the agenda became clear.  The men took food from each platter offered and ate their fill.  Then they passed whatever was left to their wives, and the children ate after the women.  Chantell stared longingly at the roasted haunch of venison, but her husband polished it off himself, leaving a greasy slice of goose for his queasy wife.  She nibbled at the heavy meat, but Angelica saw her face growing greener by the minute.  Sir William and his wife, Lady Rohanna, sat to her left, and the elderly man was leaning closer to Angelica, his foul breath all but knocking her backwards off the bench.  His hands crept near her hip, and she inched closer to her husband to avoid those greasy, sausage-sized fingers.  

“My dear Lady Angelica,” he boomed, drawing closer to her ear.  “If you can ever escape the attentions of that overgrown boy of a husband, I’ll show you how a real man treats a lady.”

“Sir,” she said, trying to cloak her polite words with a frosty chill.  “My husband is quite capable of keeping me happy.  I need not look further than his bed for my pleasure.”

She heard her husband laugh loudly.  “Your bold words have found their match with my woman, Sir William,” he said.  “I think you’ve just been rejected by the most beautiful woman in all the court.”  Then he winked.  “But if I ever tire of her, I’ll let you know.”  That remark bought a wave of laughter from those sitting around them, but Angelica lowered her eyes to hide the shocked pain his careless words caused.  

Lady Rohanna jabbed her husband in the ribs with a fat finger and announced, “Well, she’ll not be getting a bargain with you, you old windbag.  There’s not enough there to feed to the dogs, much less to pleasure a woman.”  Again, their dinner companions roared with approving laughter.

Angelica heard nothing else though.  Her eyes were on her daughter.  Caroline had unlaced her chemise enough to lower her neckline, and her small, firm breasts had drawn the attention of Sir Robert.  She leaned in close with a platter of roasted pheasant, allowing Sir Robert and his entourage a better glimpse of ripening cleavage, and Angelica’s face reddened as she observed Sir Robert reach around behind the girl to give her bottom a grope.  Far from being embarrassed, Caroline laughed and blushed, but moved tantalizingly closer to Sir Robert, to the delight of his rowdy companions.  His comments sent the child into a fit of coquettish giggles, and encouraged by the laughter of the single knights at his table, the Lord of the castle undressed her with his eyes.  Her hips swung alluringly as she left the table with her tray, tossing her curls with every shake of her head.  Laughter erupted from the knights again, and Angelica wasn’t sure who she was angrier with – her daughter or these men who were obviously behaving in a lewd manner with a twelve-year-old girl.  Didn’t they know how old she was?  Surely they should, if her husband had been a knight in this household all his adult life.

Then she remembered Chantell, and a chill crept up her spine.  Two babies and two miscarriages already, and a chance comment this afternoon had revealed that the girl was only fifteen.  She must have been about Caroline’s age when she married!  But Sir Robert already had a wife.  Why would he fondle Caroline unless his intentions were entirely dishonorable?  She glanced at Lady Augustina and saw hatred in the woman’s eyes as she watched Caroline leave the room.  Suddenly Augustina's wrath made sense.

Lady Rohanna had witnessed the incident, too, and managed to switch places with her husband to take the seat beside Angelica.  

“That’s not wise, my dear,” she whispered softly to Angelica.  “It’s best you have a talk with her, though I would dare say it’s too late already.”

Angelica’s face was white and strained, as she nodded.  “Yes, I’ll certainly have words with her.”

“Remember thee the last girl Sir Robert took to bed?” she went on.  “Kept her two months before he tired of her.  Gave her rooms of her own, and position as his mistress.  But when he was finished, she was ruined.  Who would want to wed her after that?  Her mother, God rest her soul, died of grief.  It looks like he’s chosen Caroline for his affections next.”  She clucked in a tsk-tsk manner and shook her head sadly.  “She’ll be with child before the next moon, I’ll wager ye.”

Angelica bit her lip.  “Perhaps my husband could speak to him.  Entreat him to take another instead.”

Lady Rohanna gasped.  “Lady Angelica!  You jest!  He cannot!  He cannot challenge the behavior of the Lord Robert.  What are you thinking?”

“Of course,” Angelica said, shaking her head.  “I’m thinking only of my daughter, my lady.”  She’d blundered again.  How many times could she possibly stick her foot in her mouth in one day?  But what about Caroline?  She had to do something to stop the roller coaster of events before Caroline ended up in the bed of that disgusting lecher.    She didn’t know what she was letting herself in for.  What did Caroline know about sex or men?  

Then Angelica realized that Caroline probably knew quite a bit in this era.  Her heart dropped when the girl reappeared with a tray of roasted pork held in her arms and headed straight for Sir Robert.  Lady Augustina said something to Sir Robert in a low, menacing manner.  His response was obviously a sharp rebuke, because she gave Caroline a venomous look and stood so suddenly that her chair skidded backward and toppled with a crash.  Gathering her gown in both hands, she swept from the room with three of her handmaidens scurrying to keep up with her angry retreat.  Sir Robert’s laugh was galling, and obviously at his wife’s expense.  But with the Lady of the castle absent from the table, Sir Robert’s hands found their way all over Caroline’s body, much to the delight of his knights.  

Angelica bit back angry tears and glanced sideways at James.  He had looked toward to head table to see what all the gaity was about, and watched his daughter being pawed.  Sir Robert had the audacity to sniff at Caroline’s skirts as she turned to leave the room, and James’ jaw tightened.  He raised an inquiring eyebrow at his wife.

“Has she begun her cycle?” he asked in a low voice.

“Yes,” Angelica said slowly, “last month was her first.  But what…?”  The question hung in the air as reality punched the air from her lungs.  Sir Robert sniffing at Caroline’s skirts.  The smell of blood in their room this morning had been faint, but present, and Angelica knew it was not her own.  Her stomach did another nosedive.  These men would be well aware of what blood smelled like – any kind of blood.  Was Sir Robert gauging Caroline’s womanhood by the arrival of her menses?  The grim look on James’ face told her it was so.

"Oh, God….” She whispered, looking into her husband’s eyes.  He grimaced and shook his head at the folly of their wayward daughter.  Then he returned to his conversation with Sir Alton and Sir Bradford to his right, forcing a lightness into his voice that Angelica knew was not in his heart.
 
Suddenly Angelica could no longer stand the sight or smell of food.  Jeremy dug into the remainder of their plate with relish.  His duties outdoors and his lessons had given him a powerful appetite.  

Sir Alton was a tall, barrel-chested man with long light brown hair and a neatly trimmed beard.  His kindly brown eyes turned to Angelica and included her in the conversation which she had given little heed to, with Caroline’s antics occupying her attention.

“I’ve requested Jeremy to train as my page, M’Lady,” he said, glancing at James with a smile.  “I believe he’ll make a fine addition to my household.”

Angelica’s temples throbbed.  “Really?” she questioned.  Her gaze shot to James briefly.  He had not mentioned this little tidbit when they were dressing for the banquet.  A frown creased his brow at her enigmatic look.  He was puzzled by her whole attitude today.  She was behaving most strangely, not at all like herself.

Sir Alton sensed the tension, but had no idea where it came from.  “Yes, M’Lady.  I trust you won’t object?  He’ll be well-trained under my hand, I can promise thee.”

“Of course, there is no objection,” James cut in hastily, laughing to ease the discomfort of the moment.  “What could she object to?  You are a fine warrior, Sir Alton, the best of us.  Our son will be greatly honored to be your ward.  You do still want him to move to your quarters tomorrow eve, do you not?”

“As planned, Sir James,” the gentleman said, smiling at the lad who beamed from ear to ear as he cleaned a turkey leg to the bare bone.  “I see he has a healthy appetite.”  They laughed as the boy tossed the cleaned turkey leg to the dogs and dove into a slice of roast beef.  Obviously, this life was much to his liking.  Jeremy had always loved any meat dish set before him, but he hated vegetables with a passion.  No matter how Angelica dressed them up with cheese sauces or butter and herbs, Jeremy’s vegetables managed to get shoved to the corner of his plate.  She had already noticed, to her dismay, that there were no vegetables served with their dinner this evening.  Meat and bread appeared to be the staples in this era.  No wonder they lived such diminished lives with diets lacking in greens, vegetables, and fruits!  Somehow she was certain that a crusade to enlighten them in basic dietary needs would not be well received.  Nor would a campaign to save young nubile girls from the beds of dirty old men!  There was much to bear in this new life she had wished upon herself.


  
Angelica determined to wait up, intending to catch Caroline before going to sleep.  James tried to calm her, but to no avail.

“Wife, we can do nothing about this.  Sir Robert has already cast his eyes upon her.  There is nothing I can do to help her now.”  His wife was beside herself, pacing the floor, ranting like a mad woman about the evils of the Lord of the Castle.

“I will not sit by and watch my daughter become the plaything of that wicked man,” she seethed, her hair flying around her face as she paced.  “She’s only a child!”

“She’s no older than you were when I took you to wife,” he said.

“I beg your pardon!” Angelica whirled on him in fury.  “I was much older than Caroline when we married.”  

“She’s barely a year younger,” he said wearily.  “And you must lower your voice.  If you are overheard, it will be my neck on the chopping block.”

“Your neck is already on the chopping block with me, James,” she said, glaring at him with tears in her eyes.  “And what is this nonsense about Jeremy going to live with Sir … Sir… what ever his name is?  Suddenly I have no say in what happens to this family?  Is that it?”

James stood over her in a flash and grabbed her by the shoulders.  “His name is Sir Alton, as you well know.  And you also know that he is a fine man, an excellent swordsman, and a knight of good character and sound morals.  He’ll give Jeremy the best training, and he’ll treat him kindly, which is more than I can say for many of the knights in this castle.  I should think you would be pleased, instead of throwing your temper at me like a peasant.”  Angelica’s face paled and her eyes narrowed to slits.  Even with her limited knowledge of the world she now lived in, she knew that this was not meant to be a compliment.  “And since when does a man have to explain to his wife any decision he makes concerning his family?  Woman, I don’t know what you’ve got in your mind tonight, but I don’t need to consult you about anything.  I’m the man, and I make the decisions.  You’ll keep a respectful tongue in your head.”  He released her arms with a forceful shove and moved back to the bedside, removing his tunic with his back to her. 

Jeremy’s eyes were wide as he stared at their confrontation from under the blankets on the far side of the bed.  He had never heard his mother talk to his father like this before.  Why would she be angry with Sir Alton?  He was a good man, and like Father had said, he would be a kind and generous master.  Jeremy could have done much worse, and he knew it.  Sir Alton had always been a gentleman around Mother, not given to the ribald comments that many of the knights indulged in.  Why was she so angry tonight?  The questions were too big for his little boy understanding, so he turned on his side and tried to sleep, while his mother resumed her pacing, her chest heaving with soft, angry sobs.

“We might as well get it all out tonight, Angelica,” he said, turning to face her resolutely.  “Sir Robert is sending me to the Holy Land.  With the return of Sir Goderick and his men, Sir Robert desires another to take up the sword in the crusade against the heathens.  He has chosen me.  I leave in two day’s time with thirty men.”

Angelica felt her knees turn to water.  James gazed at her, daring her to speak against his Holy Duty to the Church.  Her behavior of this day baffled him.  She had always fulfilled her wifely duties with a quiet submission, but lately, she seemed angry and defiant.  Perhaps he was leaving just in time.  Her unseemly actions would only hurt his position in Sir Robert’s household.  First Caroline’s wild behavior, then Angelica’s odd manner in the Great Hall.  If he remained, the women in his life would bring down Sir Robert’s wrath upon his head.  Better to face the Muslims in Jerusalem than displeasure and disgrace in his own homeland.   

“You would leave me here?” she said, her voice sounding shrill to her own ears.  “You would leave when Caroline needs you?  What am I supposed to do while you run off to play these knight-in-shining-armor games?”

James crossed the room in one quick stride and grabbed Angelica by the shoulders again.  Dragging her back to the bed, he threw her down and pinned her arms. 

“Games?  You think this is a game?  Nay, wife, this probably means my life.  Most knights don’t return from the Holy Land, and this you know well.  Are you truly so foolish as to believe that this is mere coincidence?  Sir Robert desires my daughter, so he rids himself of my presence, lest my allegiance be diminished.  And you, my…. Wife…” he added viciously, “… will endeavor to ensure that, if I should return, I will still hold a place of honor in this household.  You will behave in a manner that will not harm my station in my absence.”

His mouth came down on hers greedily, though she tried to pull away.

“I am not in the mood for this, James,” she gasped, struggling to free herself from his painful grip.

“What do I care of your mood?” he snarled, as rough hands tugged at her gown.  “You are my wife.  I don’t need your approval for this either.”

Angelica thought of the child on the other side of the bed, and her stomach churned with disgust.  Simple life, was it?  Never was a statement more false.




When James had fallen asleep, Angelica had slipped from the bed and moved to the ledge below the narrow window at the opposite end of the room.  She wanted as much distance between herself and her slumbering husband as possible.  Tears fell like rain as she gazed out over the dark landscape.  James had never treated her so roughly before.  He cared nothing for her pleasure or desire.  He fulfilled a basic animal need, then rolled over and dropped into a heavy slumber.  She hated this life!  She wanted to go home, back to an era when women had at least some form of recourse when their husbands resorted to violence.

Angelica had finally fallen asleep with her head on the stones of the window’s edge when her tears had spent the last of her energy.

The sun was casting a pink glow outside the window, when the door creaked open.  Her head came up with a jerk.  Her husband was gone, his side of the bed rumpled, his clothes and sword missing.  Jeremy rolled over and peered sleepily at his sister’s disheveled clothing, then at his mother’s taut, angry face.  Time to leave before the fight began, he decided.  Grabbing his tunic and belt, he made a beeline for the door, stopped, ran back and gave his mother’s cheek a quick peck before bolting for the door again.

“Need I ask where you’ve been all night?” Angelica asked, the fury in her voice barely contained.

“Sir Robert requested my presence,” Caroline said, a smug smile on her face.  The marks on her neck and breasts told the story of passion and lust, her eyes were bold and reckless.  

“He’ll use you, then throw you away like … like… the scraps from his table,” sputtered Angelica.  She grabbed Caroline by the shoulders and shook her.  “Don’t you understand anything, you foolish girl?  He’s done this before, and he’ll do it again.  I’m trying to protect you.”

“You’re trying to keep me under your heel,” the girl snapped, yanking away from her mother’s grasp.  “I won’t be held back any longer.  Sir Robert is giving me rooms of my own.  My rank will be higher than yours, Mother.”

Angelica’s face whitened.  He’d already promised the child the moon, and she had believed his lies.

Caroline reached for her extra chemise and the lavender gown hanging on the hook.  “I came for my things.  Sir Robert is waiting for me now.”  She turned before opening the door, and whirled to face her stricken mother once more.  “By the way, Mother, you can begin work on my first gown today.  I want a deep purple one with gold trim.  Lady Augustina has a bolt of new purple fabric.  Sir Robert says it will be mine. You can attend me for a fitting as soon as you have the first seams finished.  I’ll need it immediately, of course.”

“Wh-wh-what?” gasped Angelica.

“Oh, yes,” the girl said, savoring her first taste of power and position.  “You can do my gown before you do anything else for that cow, Augustina.  I’ll need mine first.  She has enough.  I’ll need something befitting my new station in this castle.”

Angelica felt her knees weaken, and she sat suddenly on the edge of the bed.  She felt Lilith’s presence before she saw her.  The dark-haired woman stood beside Caroline and they both gazed at her contemptuously.  Angelica looked from one to the other in numb disbelief.

“How did it go, my pet?” Lilith cooed to Caroline.

“Perfectly,” Caroline said with that smug satisfaction pasted on her face again.  “He’s putty in my hands, Lilith.  I had him panting for me like a dog.”

Lilith’s laughter was vile and ugly.  “Men are ruled by the contents of their pants, my dear.  Keep that part happy, and he’ll give you anything you desire.”

“I did rather enjoy it, you know,” Caroline said, and Angelica’s stomach heaved.  “It was over far more quickly than I thought it would be.  You were right though. 
The bleeding helped to ease his entry.  It wasn’t painful at all.  And the things you taught me before… well, my dear Fairy Godmother, you prepared me quite well.”

“You are an apt pupil,” Lilith said, brushing a lock of hair away from the girl’s face.  She touched the red marks around the girl’s shoulder and the top of her breast with one red fingernail.  “I see he was well-pleased with your … er… endowments.”  

“Stop it!” Angelica screamed, lunging for Lilith in horror.  “Stop it!  Don’t you dare touch my daughter like that!  Who are you?  What are you?  My God!  What have you done to my little girl?”

Lilith caught Angelica’s outstretched hands in a vise-like grip and shoved her backwards onto the bed.  Falling on top of her and pinning her arms to the blankets, Lilith looked deep into Angelica’s eyes.

“It’s too late to call on God, dear Angelica.  Maybe you should have asked … Him… to help you with your wishes before you petitioned me.”  Her tone was filled with wrath and contempt.  “You live in a world of my making now, and this is where you’ll die.”

"What do you mean 'petitioned' you?  You just showed up in my living room with your fantastic tales of wishes!" Angelica shrieked wildly through tears.  "I didn't ask for your help."

Lilith's smile was filled with venom and her green eyes glowed.  "Oh, yes, pet, you requested my aid with every angry, disgruntled, dissatisfied thought.  You wanted a different life, a lazy life of ease and pleasure – and I gave it to you."

“Wh-wh-who are you?” Angelica whispered in horror.

“Why, my dear, I’m her ‘godmother’ as well as yours.  You wanted simplicity; she wanted power.  You wanted to sit and sew all day; she wanted to be treated like a woman instead of a child, constantly told what to do, where to go, how to think.  I gave you both exactly what you wished for.  Just think.  You could have had so much more, Angelica.  You can’t blame Caroline for wanting more than you did.”

“But he’s just using her, and you know it,” Angelica cried.  “He’ll throw her to the dogs when he’s done with her.  What will you do for her then?”

Lilith leaned down and whispered in her ear, “I’ll laugh, Angelica, I’ll laugh.  When Sir Robert tires of her complaints, and Lady Augustina carps in his ear about her haughty airs, he’ll give dear Caroline to his knights.  They’ll have their way with her in the Great Hall night after night.  And she’ll learn that power doesn’t last.    She’ll be used, and she’ll be beaten when she objects.  Augustina will exact her own revenge for all those moments when Caroline will flout her position.  Caroline will be raking the thrushes in the Great Hall, and emptying chamber pots in filthy rags instead of royal purple robes.  Robes that Sir Robert will keep for his next mistress.  She'll see that gown on another more pliable girl long after she's been thrown to the dogs, as you so aptly put it.  You’ll have the last laugh, Angelica. She’ll know you were right, but she’ll be powerless to change her fate.  She’ll grow diseased, and die before she’s eighteen.  And you’ll watch.”

“No,” sobbed Angelica.  “No!  I won’t let you do that to my baby!”

“Oh, and Angelica, that little trip James is taking?  The Crusades?”  Her laugh was evil and filled with malice, but her voice was low enough for Angelica’s ears alone.  “Don’t you worry about him.  I’ll go along to keep him company.  I’ll show him things you never even dreamed of.  And when he dies at the point of a Saracen sword, I’ll be right there to grind dirt into his wounds.  I’ll tell him every detail of his daughter’s sordid night-life, and how Sir Robert was willing to sell the beautiful Lady Angelica to some barbarian in Scotland rather than look into her accusing eyes for one more day.  I’ll share all those things with him just before he dies.”

“Wh-wh-what are you?” Angelica knew she was face to face with evil right now.  Lilith was the devil incarnate.

“I rule in the depths of Hell, that place reserved for the most rebellious, the most lascivious, the vilest of all humanity.  I, dear Angelica, I bring them to that delicious point of no return.    I, Angelica, I visit men in the night and use my power to make slaves of them.  I feed on their secrets, and whet their appetites until every wicked desire consumes them and overwhelms any devotion to … ” she appeared to choke on the word, “… God.  I give them everything they want, and when they reach the very lowest of their passions, I take their lives and toss them in the fires of Hell to burn.  I revel in their pain, and I feed on their basest unfulfilled desires.”

Caroline could hear nothing of the conversation, but she could see the shame and anguish on her Mother’s face, and she reveled in it.  Let Lilith shock and mortify her!  Mother was nothing but an old-fashioned, strait-laced prude who wouldn’t let her live her own life.  Whatever pain Lilith caused her, she deserved.  Caroline was going to live like a queen, and her Mother was going to serve her every whim, whether she liked it or not.  Her gowns would be the finest in the castle, and she was going to rule over that horrid Augustina.  Lilith had coached her well, and the results were exactly what she'd expected.  She had the Lord of the Castle eating out of her hand.  Sir Robert promised her that no one would tell her what to do anymore.  He would lay the world at her feet.  Some of the things he had done during that night had been vile and disgusting, but all that would change as soon as she was in control.  She’d tell him what he could and could not do to her.  She’d change everything.

Lilith planted a kiss on Angelica’s lips, but the sobbing woman wrenched her face away from the demonic affection.  Lilith pushed herself upright and towered over the pathetic woman, who curled into a fetal position and hid her face in the thick blankets.    

Lilith and Caroline laughed as they left the room, their arms draped around each other’s shoulders.  Angelica slipped from the bed to the floor, still clinging to the blankets with white-knuckled fists, and wept.  A wish.  A stupid, thoughtless, ungrateful wish.  She longed for a ringing telephone, a car, an annoying conference at school, a refrigerator with decent, well-kept food, a sink, a bathtub, a toilet, all the problems of a century far removed from this cesspool of lustful men and brutish laws that made chattel out of women.  Her life was spinning out of control, and she was powerless to stop the deadly chain of events.

God, she screamed silently, what am I going to do?  I should have been grateful for what I had.  Where did I go wrong?  What could I have done differently?  And what am I going to do now?  

Even as she sobbed, regretting the night she had wished for a simple life, that era clouded over like mists in the valley.  She tried to remember what that life used to be like, with square machines that cleaned her clothes, and shiny white plates with which she had once served strangely exotic dishes, but the details were fuzzy, like sheeps wool on a spindle.  Her memories toppled like apples from a cart, the brief courtship of James (if you could call his demands a courtship), the birth of each of their children in the big bed upon which she now lay, the endless days of sewing, the evening feasts, kneeling before the priest to confess sins on a cold stone floor, Lady Augustina’s angry eyes boring holes into her heart over the rebelliousness of her provocative daughter, Sir Robert’s wandering hands on her own bodice long before he decided to defile her daughter.  The years of hardship in a realm ruled by a wicked man and his equally hateful wife had left Angelica feeling that life was hardly worth living.  She cried into the blankets, unable to drag herself from her bed, even at the risk of Augustina’s wrath.

A strangled scream from the next room heralded the beginning of Chantell’s labor.  Lady Angelica rose, wiping her swollen eyes with the back of her hands and adjusting her veil on her head.  Duty called.  Chantell’s delivery would most likely be a difficult one, as were all the deliveries before.  Lady Angelica only hoped that Sir Thomas had left by now.  Last time, she’d had to wait in the hall while he took his pleasure with the poor girl, she remembered with distaste, even as Chantell writhed in the pangs of hard labor.  He had reeked of ale when he swaggered out of the room and past a mortified Angelica.  They had almost lost Chantell that day.
 
Her thoughts strayed to her son, learning from Sir Alton.  Sir Alton had courted her before James, but had been sent off to settle some minor disturbance along the coast by Sir Robert.  James stepped in and petitioned the Lord for the right to wed her, and he had granted it.  Sometimes she wished Sir Alton had not been sent away.  Perhaps things would have been different if she had been given to the gentle Sir Alton.  

Sometimes she wished…….