"Time´s End (chapter 5- new)" by Nicoline Badenhorst

“My little queen, is something wrong?” Robin asked as they were headed up to her rooms. She had been uncommonly silent during mealtime.

She shook her head. “No, no. Don’t worry. All is fine.”

 “It’s this stupid quest thing, isn’t it? It’s spooking around in your little mind now, and you are thinking up the wildest theories again.”

She laughed, though it wasn’t with the usual mirth. “You know me too well. You don’t know anything, perchance?”

 “You know that even if I did, I wouldn’t be allowed to tell you. You know that this is something that you humans must solve by yourselves for it to be worth anything.”

 “But will you at least come with me?” Her need for him hurt him. She was doing what she shouldn’t. Humans! Why couldn’t they just enjoy the moment? Why did they have to go and spoil things with love?

 “Maybe. You know I have duties, and now with Darak coming into action again it would be folly to abandon my post.”

 “I understand.” Her tone told him exactly that she didn’t, at least not with her heart.

They had reached her quarters. Mae was there, sitting on the cushions, waiting.

 “Mae? Is something amiss?” Lanouri asked, immediately worried.

 “No, nothing. I just felt a little lonely. But I suppose you have better things to do...” She made to get up, but Lanouri strode over, pushing her back down gently.

 “Of course you can stay.” Lanouri glanced at Robin, who nodded imperceptibly.

They lay down on either side of Mae, spreading a light blanket over all three of them. “Do you remember how we used to do this every evening when we were out camping in the woods?” Lanouri whispered, all sorrow forgotten at her friend’s loneliness. Even if Mae thought she didn’t know, thought she had kept it a secret, Lanouri knew only too well the loneliness she felt. They all felt it, shared it, in their own way. They all had their stories of pain and treason, of love lost. They all were broken somehow, and hadn’t found anyone to heal them, just someone to ease the pain. Maybe that’s all anyone could really hope for.

Robin took Mae’s hand. It was so different to Lanouri’s, less worked, pale, with beautifully long fingers- the fingers of an artist. An artist that would never draw the pictures she saw with her mind’s eye.

Binding contact was easy, both women’s minds were open and relaxed. He took them to see the world through his eyes, shared his vision with them, gave them to drink from the fountain of three hundred years of memories.

Everything was iridescent with a million shades and tints of colour. The sun felt warm, like the caressing hand of a mother on their skin as they rode slowly through the forest with a thousand sounds singing a symphony to their ears. The air had that curiously tart but sweet flavour that was not really definable but somehow reminded of autumn. They felt their hearts beat in unison, in harmony with everything around them. Peace. They absorbed every bit of it, soaking it up as if afraid to lose it, trying to capture it, hold on to it forever and ever and ever.

Scene change. They were galloping across a plain, the colours dulled, the sounds muted, their sense of smell and taste toned down to the human sensory range. They felt the wind ripple through their hair, felt the power of Aure underneath them as she galloped faster and farther. Freedom. Utter freedom. It felt as though they had sprouted wings, flying away from all the trouble, all the noise, all the obligations and duties that were too much for them. Freedom. The wind blew away all restrictions, all rules. Their hearts beat wildly against their ribs with the ecstasy of life. Life, as pure and beautiful as only humans can experience it, as intense as only humans can bear it.

Darkness. Eternal darkness, but, as if to make up, the song of sound thrilled louder, higher, more harmonious. The vertigo of a dance above the rooftops, on the battlements. The knowledge of impeding death only heightened the experience, only intensified the need for life. The wind carried shards of laughter from below and they felt the sense of belonging. They were one, differences didn’t matter up here, where there was only life and death, separated by a thin line. They danced a delirious dance to the composition of summer scents wafting up from the forest- the sweetness of honey, the tart smell of nuts and acorns, the slightly bitter aroma of earth, wet from dew. This was harmony, this was real. Their need for reality only grew with each precarious step, harmony seemed always one step out of reach...

They had fallen asleep in the comfort of their embrace, the shared memories soothing their loneliness, sating their need for love, giving them the strength they found nowhere else.

* * *

Lanouri used her time well. Whenever she had the chance, she placed another sting into Arlon’s side, vindictively reminding him of the treason he had committed, the trust he had abused. She might not be able to do anything about it, might not be able to get out of the forced promise- the unspoken laws of Marin prevented that- but she could at least unload her resentment on him freely. At least she could unburden herself of the sense of captivity she felt at countless rules- you must be strong, voices whispered, chiding her for a weakness that was not her fault, the fault she had been born with and could not hide. If you’re not strong, anything that happens to you is your own fault, and you can’t expect mercy. The thought ran through her bitterly, and she renewed her efforts to solve the riddle. She’d show them! She’d do the impossible, and solve it, all by herself! She did some thorough research in the library, and, though she longed for the more comprehensive library at Hunter’s Retreat, she made good progress. Lanouri felt she had already solved one riddle halfway, and knew where to look for the solutions to the others. Though sometimes her doubts resurfaced and she felt wilful and unwilling to continue, she couldn’t help being carried away with excitement.

She had taken Iand to practice his weapons skill with the explanation that he was to be able to defend himself against attack. As she had feared, he was not as skilled with weapons as he was with words.

 “I’m afraid that in my country, there is no need for the average citizen to arm himself,” he excused himself again and again.

Lanouri’s smile became more and more forced as she said: “No need to excuse yourself, everybody had to learn at one time or other...”

After only half the usual time, she called a halt. “Enough for today. You’re getting better.”

He only grimaced. “No need to lie. I’m atrocious.”

 “True.” Just as they turned to go up into the castle for supper, Aureola flew into the court. Lanouri looked up at the bat. “Oh, hello mother. How was the watch? I thought you were only due this night?” She held out her cupped hands to help her mother alight, then set her down gently, so she could transform. Iand paled in disbelief, shocked to the marrow. Unbelievable! If what he had seen right now was true and real, his world had just scored a death hit! But probably he had just caught too much sun, he reasoned. Still... how much sun did anyone need to see such things? He shook his head weakly. He didn’t know what to believe.

 “Thank you, my daughter. It’s so much easier this way.” Lanouri helped her mother up and supported her into the castle. “I’ve bad news, I fear. Your father’s lot is really on the move again, and dangerously close to the forest already. What with that business of the breaching of the Banning, I thought it was best to return immediately.”

Lanouri only sighed. “With all due respect, but what’s he gotten into his brains this time?” She stopped a runner. “Wait a second please- run off to the kitchens for provisions for my mother please, she’s just returned from a watch. We’ll be with Adalia.”

“Bad news?” The runner asked.

Lanouri sighed. Of course the runner had every right to know, but her questions were very inconvenient right now. She considered. If she lied now, rumours would spread like hellwater, if she didn’t, they’d spread anyhow. She glanced at her mother for permission to speak. “Yes. Darak’s on the move.”

 “So we’ll get another little princess in nine months?” The runner joked  unconcernedly and headed off.

Lanouri had totally forgotten about Iand, who had weakly trailed after them. “Well, that proves you must have been right about that thing- what did you say? ‘It’s biologically impossible for a human to live off blood only. Vampires cannot exist.’” She smiled her evillest smile at him.

He shook his head in disbelief and dismay. “I still don’t know how this is supposed to be possible, yet I cannot distrust my eyes either.”

 “Chemical reactions in a body can make it shift its form for a certain amount of time. I’m sure you’ll appreciate that it takes an unbelievably high amount of energy, not to mention that it is highly dangerous too, which is why we’d better get my mother up to the throne room.”

* * *

She let Aureola slide onto a pile of cushions and brought her a bowl of fruit and a vial of a clear liquid. Aureola first drained the vial, grimaced, and immediately began sucking the fruit dry.

 “Essence of Truth- the extract of the night rose. As I said, it can cure almost any disease... and it stabilizes her body- every shape-shifter has to be very careful, or else he risks disintegration... “

 “Makes sense. The atomic bonds have to be under great strain.”

 “Well, usually, the body produces a certain amount of the substance, but better safe than sorry.” Aureola cut in.

 “Now that those technicalities are out of our system, how about you tell us what’s going on?” Adalia asked cheerily.

 “Not much, really.” Lanouri replied nonchalantly for her mother. “Darak is having one of his restless moments...”

 “Nothing worse? Couldn’t that have waited till the end of your shift, Aureola?” one of the advisors asked.

 “It could have- if he wasn’t already almost on our doorstep. What with the Banning down- or have you figured that one out yet, Adalia?- I judged it safer to come back immediately.” Aureola replied.

 “How could that have happened, Janne? I thought you had doubled the watch?” Adalia asked sharply.

 “I’d say he did it like last time he almost got us in our back.” Lanouri interjected. “He has the help of a mage.”

 “Impossible. You must have seen things.”

 “Really! Tell me of a daemon with mirror eyes again and I’ll show you a singing siren[1]. I know what I saw, and if you don’t believe me, at least believe your beloved, perfect first-born daughter.” Anger glared in Lanouri’s eyes, turning them the colour of nightshade’s fruit.

 “Stop the fighting immediately. Never mind how they got here, the important thing is how to get rid of them again.” Janne shouted them down. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’ll take that into my hands. Lanouri, it’s time for you to find the Cask of Ashathorin, so I’d suggest that you depart first thing in the morning.” She glanced at Adalia for approval, who nodded. “Then, off you go and no more talk of mages or daemons.”

Lanouri stood, looking like a fish out of water, at a loss for words. Then she turned on her heels and stalked out, closely followed by Iand.

 “Don’t say a word.” She hissed.

 “I wouldn’t dare. Good night, he replied coldly and headed off to his rooms.

Sighing, she leant against a wall for a few moments, closing her eyes and reminiscing about the turn of events that had unbalanced her so much. No sense, she reminded herself and decisively, turned towards the corridor that would eventually lead into the city.

She chose a seat more or less outside the circle of light around the fire. Swirling the viscous, almost too sweet wine in her glass, she leant back against the wall and waited for someone to start a new story. The pubs in Marin city were made not so much for draining worries in alcoholic drinks but rather for informal news swapping and storytelling. By any measure, at least nobody would make any demands upon her, or worse, criticise her, here.

 “I shall tell you a story of dreams, or, more accurately, of the maker of all dreams. In the forbidden ruins there is said to live a spinner of tales, by the name of Eirlis, who told me this story, and told me to tell it to you.”

 “What were you doing in the forbidden ruins, if that’s what they are- forbidden?” Lanouri couldn’t contain her curiosity.

The storyteller blinked in surprise, but could not discern the speaker and so replied to the room in general. “Well, somebody has to check whether everybody adheres to that rule, don’t they? Anyhow: Eirlis told to me the story of the Webbing, where the essence of all dreams lives. Before the great wars that destroyed all order and all true magic, the essence of dreams was cast into all the lands, and because all dreams were well, all was well. Well, as far as well things can be well where there is both evil and well.” Infectious laughter. “But then there came the wars and the dreams were in peril, for the poison that spread in the land killed all dreams. And who could live without dreams but the daemons? Or worse, who could live with poisoned dreams? If you ask my opinion, better no dreams than dreams that are really just nightmares. By the way, who made up such a stupid word –night-mare? As though having bad dreams had something to do with horses... So the gods of old took what was left of all dreams, gathered it up -not an easy task, that’s for sure- and closed it away in a crystal vial. –it must have taken much time and effort to make this vial, for it is made of the tears of a thousand lost souls, bound together only by the rays of the sun and sealed with a word and the icy earth above the end of the sky. You have to be very careful around such things of magic, you know –one wrong word and you’ll blow up the whole world because that vial got unstopped.” The narrator put in a dramatic pause, looking around him smugly.

 “So where did they put that time-bomb of dreams?” Somebody asked with laughter in his voice.

 “I was getting to that, don’t ruin my storyline. As I was saying, the gods went to quite an effort to get the dreams out of their way... But that’s not what they wanted -at least not the goodies amongst them, because, of course, the baddies would have enjoyed a world without dreams –makes it so much easier to gain absolute power... Well, so the gods swept this vial-crystal-thing to a place where they thought nobody would find it, but the way you know these deities, it could be almost anywhere- they really don’t seem to have gotten the hang of actually hiding things. You know, only last week I found what they call ‘gods’ shoes’. You know, I’d be better at hiding my old stinky shoes, if I were them.” The audience, to the narrator’s satisfaction, laughed. Of course, everyone knew that “gods’ shoes” was a rare plant of which could be made an excellent beer. “No undue mirth, please. Well, wherever they put it, they cast a web around it so that everybody who tried to get at it would get stuck- just imagine that –where there’s a giant web, there’s bound to be a stinking spider around, too. Wouldn’t want to get stuck in there for all the dreams in the world... Now here’s the ingenious thing: the gods struck this web up so that the rising moon would strike out an itsy bitsy bit of the essence of dreams with its rays, which could spread out into the world and make every dreaming thing happy. Oh, that’s a bit I nearly forgot- you all know of course that the moon, especially the full moon, has magical powers beyond the worst the Temple scum could dream up, so if ever you’re in trouble- who you gonna call? The moon! And that’s my tale for tonight.”

* * *

When Lanouri returned, her mother was waiting in her rooms. “I want a word with you, my daughter. There is much we need to talk about,” she began, and suddenly found herself lacking words. Too much had been left unsaid between them for too long, and now she didn’t know how to say what needed saying.

 “Firstly, I am not content with your behaviour of late. Do you not know that it does not do for a woman of your age and position to depart without leave by the queen? Do you not know that sometimes, it does to keep one’s private thoughts out of a political discussion? You shamed me very much by your outburst of temper. I shall find it gracious of you if you would in the future keep your temper and mind your manners. We cannot have our guests think we are but barbaric, uncivilised peasants. I am very disappointed of you.”

Searing hot pain stabbed Lanouri in the heart. It had always been like this: she did something wrong, and her mother talked to her in a calm, dispassionate voice, telling her that she had disappointed her. Always me! Why does Tyleen never do anything wrong? She swallowed the tears that threatened to well up. Tears are weakness. You may not cry. She nodded, subdued, docile.

 “Secondly, I should think it is time you find a suitable man to sire an heir. Your grandmother intends to unhand her office soon, and you would not want the state endangered by your continued inability to provide a strong heir, would you?” Her voice had become soft, almost gentle. “You know that there must always be two successors to the throne. No less will do.”

 “No, mother. I shall do my best,” she said dutifully.

 “I have utmost confidence in you.” Aureola got up.

 “Good night mother,” Lanouri said, getting up wearily to hold open the curtains for her.

 “Good night, my daughter.”

* * *

After a night full of restless dreams of giant spiders hiding crimson droplets of something she, for a reason she could not remember, needed, she woke a little early for breakfast. It was just beginning to dawn- her favourite time of day-, the cold was worst this time of day, making her shiver as she stepped into her clothes. She felt more alive during this time of day, more alive and more beautiful. More like Tyleen. Tyleen the traitor. On second thought, she didn’t want to feel akin to her.

She went down into the hall, contemplating the day ahead. They wouldn’t be able to travel fast, or depart soon, since Tyleen’s valuable health might be compromised.

 “We’ll be abroad for no more than two weeks.” She announced to the travelling group, accompanied to the horses by Adalia and her court. “Then we’ll return to the castle for a brief sojourn, before we set out anew. No sense in prowling the sacred lands from end to end- what we’re looking for won’t be hidden under stones.”

 “Why waste time coming back here? We know there’s nothing we want here,” Arlon criticized.

 “Oh, we do, don’t we? Since you know so much about what we need or don’t need for our mission, why don’t you tell us all? Don’t worry to make a fool of yourself; it isn’t as though we didn’t expect it of you,” Lanouri replied over her back while she refastened the belts of her saddle and checked the saddlebags.

 “Well, at least I know where we ought to go. Instead of loitering about wherever it pleases you, we should be heading for the forbidden ruins and just break into the Cask.”

 “’Just break into the Cask’,” Lanouri now turned to face Arlon squarely. “Well, while you try that, and rot trying, we’ll just ‘save the world’. That ok with you?” She imitated the gesticulations of apes.

Iand couldn’t help giggling at the sight of the tiny, stout Lanouri pulling faces at the morose, gaunt Arlon, who in turn glared at her as though he was struggling against an impulse to turn her into a toad. To his great relief, Adalia join him in outright laughter.

 “You do realize that you’d just do Lanouri a favour if you tried to turn her into a toad, don’t you, Arlon?” Even sweet Mae didn’t seem able to refrain from a sarcastic comment. “After all, what problems would a real princess have at finding a prince to kiss her back into her true shape? Even if she didn’t have the power to turn herself back, you’d only loose out. Now let’s get going.”

Arlon did his best to ignore the triumphant smirk on Lanouri’s face at these last words and instead helped Tyleen up her horse.

Lanouri spun around on her heels. Not seeing who she was looking for, she asked softly: “Where’s Robin?”

 “He’s gone off at the break of dawn with Janne- they’re checking the Banning.” Aureola replied.

 “Oh. That’s good of him.” The barely concealed disappointment in her voice made Iand feel uncomfortable for no logical reason. It was as though he wanted her for himself, as though by befriending others, she was taking something away from him. He shook his head, what nonsense!

 “Farewell, then. I won’t ask you not to get yourselves into trouble- won’t help, since the only way to avoid trouble is to separate the two of you-” Adalia looked sternly at Lanouri and Arlon. “Until we meet again.” She kissed her granddaughter lightly on the forehead and waited until she had lost sight of the seven figures on their horses. Then she turned to Aureola.

 “I want you to arrange for Arlon’s retinue to be escorted safely out of Marin forest, and to see to the needs of the Sictem that shall not be going with them.”

Aureola nodded. “What are your plans?”

 “I have none as yet. We shall have to wait and see. Have you spoken to your daughter?”

 “Yes. She seemed to realize her error. She shall not disappoint us again, she promised. I broached the subject of an heir to her as well, and she was very understanding. I believe we can yet make a queen of her.”

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[1] In this world, sirens cannot sing, they are mute from birth and rely on telepathy to communicate.