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Molly Kate  Hanrahan

"Full Moon" by Molly Kate Hanrahan

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A short story about me and my best friend getting eaten by a werewolf.


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It was 11 o’clock at night, myself and Charlotte were deciding what we should do for the night.

“I have an idea, C’mon let’s go for a walk, we could do with a good walk”, Charlotte said , as she put on her striped black and white jacket.

“Do we have to, what about the stories people have told us”, I replied, standing in front of the back door, trying to stop her from making a big mistake.

“Oh please, werewolves don’t exist. It’s just a pack of lies”, she replied. Charlotte pulled me away from the door, unlocked it and then stood on the door step holding out a torch to me.

“Nothing will happen, it’s a quiet neighbour hood anyway”, she tried to assure me.

“Fine, but don’t blame me if you get eaten by a werewolf”, I replied taking the torch from her and switching it on. We walked to the bottom of the garden, unlocked the gate, which led onto a field next to a river.

We walked along the path against the river, then walked underneath an old bridge, where black crows sat, and squawked at us. Every few moments I turned to look behind me, just incase of any followers. The wind was strong this evening, trees rustled and stones fell from nearby slopes.

A bird flew out of a bush in front of me, I jumped back and landed on the ground, my heart pounding so quickly.

“ Molly, are you okay?” Charlotte asked, as she pulled me back onto my feet.

“No I’m not okay, why couldn’t we have stayed at home?”, I asked whilst scraping the mud off of my jacket.

“It’s an adventure”, Charlotte replied as she laughed and continued walking. I followed close behind, I looked up to the pitch black night sky, just through a couple of tree branches I could see the moon. A bright, silver full moon.

All of a sudden a loud scream came from in front of me, I looked back down and saw that Charlotte was gone. I looked to the left of me and in the ground I could see a paw print and then in front of that, was a puddle of dark, fresh blood.

“Charlotte!” I shouted from the top of my voice. I got no answer, I began to panic, my heart racing with fear.

To the right of me, a bush began to rustle. I moved slowly backwards, not moving my gaze from the bush.

Then a bush behind me rustled even more. I couldn’t stay any longer, I ran as fast as possible, back towards the house. My heart pounded as I heard something behind me. I eventually lost my breath, still half way to go till I could reach safety. I tried to catch my breath and then froze, remembering that I’d heard something or someone behind me.

I turned slowly round, and I heard faint growls. When I had turned completely, I was staring into dark red eyes, eyes of hunger and anger.

The beast’s mouth opened, showing it’s sharp, white teeth and then it slammed it’s mouth shut, warning me that I was it’s midnight snack.

Charlotte was so wrong, werewolves do exist.

It stood up on it’s hind legs, growling right in my face, my heart pounded so hard that I thought it might come out of my chest. Strangely it then returned onto all fours and ran off into a nearby bush. I stopped panicking. Slowly but warily I walked backwards, keeping my eye on the bush. I turned round to head home and a few metres in front of me, the werewolf jumped out of another bush I dropped my torch, and froze with fear. “Oh crap”. I blinked twice, the last thing I ever saw was the shining moon above me.

←- Full Moon | Full Moon -→

DateNameComment 
22 Feb 2010:-) Marie Violetmoon Richy
... 17 after dark is extremely frightening.
I felt a cold chill suddenly come over me, mysterious and fascinating,
I like! 12

:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "thanks
"
22 Feb 2010:-) Emma Carolina Wahrenberg
Really cool! I love the ending, it was awesome, hehe 1

:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "thanks emma i’m gonna do one on vampires next or faeries 12"
22 Feb 2010:-) Chelsea L Pennelly
very nice

:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "thanks
"
22 Feb 2010:-) Lynn K Hollander
“I have an idea, C’mon let’s go for a walk, we could do with a good walk” Charlotte said ... ~~More correctly, this would go like this: “I have an idea, C’mon let’s go for a walk, we could do with a good walk ,” Charlotte said... There are a lot of errors like this one.
Homophones, words that sound alike but have different meanings are always difficult: It’s and its ~~one is the contraction of it is and the other is the possessive pronoun. ~~Here you need the possessive pronoun: It stood up on it’s hind legs... If you replace it’s with it is, you can see this: It stood up on it is hind legs... makes no sense. Use its here.



:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "thanks for the heads up on that, appreciate the help 1"
23 Feb 2010:-) Silvannen Mystic Dragonrider Gerrard
Nice, and deffinately shows potential...the ending was good, only hinting at what happened....sort of left you hanging. ^_^ Though what did your best friend say, or have you not told her? Hehe.
Just one little thought:
you put: ’I got no answer, I began to panic, my heart racing with fear.’
if you wanted it to sound more tense you could change the commas to full stops, so it would read: ’I got no answer. I began to panic. My heart was racing with fear.’
You don’t have to change it, but the use of sudden short, minor sentences tends to make a piece more dramatic....or so my A-level English teacher says! ^_^

:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "thanks silvannen I’ll remember those tips, my english teacher always tells me about the same stuff 12"
23 Feb 2010:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan
And I have told my best friend ( who is actually my cousin) Lol she loves it even though she gets eaten 1
27 Mar 2010:-) Chris King
Thanks for the fun read, Molly. I thought the overall pace was well done, and I enjoyed the interplay between the characters. The balance between description and action was good. Your use of grammar is solid, but could use some editing/polishing (which is really true for all of us). Good job!

:-) Molly Kate Hanrahan replies: "hey thanks very much glad you liked it 2"
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'Full Moon':
 • Created by: :-) Molly Kate Hanrahan
 • Copyright: ©Molly Kate Hanrahan. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Moon, Werewolf
 • Categories: Lycanthrope, Were-folk, etc, Mythical Creatures & Assorted Monsters, Woman, Women, Sci-Fi Monsters
 • Inspirations: Other Artist
 • Submitted: 2010-02-18 21:14:46
 • Views: 697

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