"Immortal" by Gwenivere Stephan

Immortal

"Mister Katzer? There’s someone here to visit you," said the woman. Short, plump, with big white teeth and short blonde hair, pretty enough. She spoke overly loud, as though I could not hear her. Of course I could. I was not the deaf old man people seemed to think I was. Just because I lived in this Home…

"Bring him in," I muttered. I winced because my voice – once strong and robust like the summer sun – sounded like crackling leaves on the sidewalk in autumn. My breath rasped in my throat and I fought the urge to cough. (And my brain, once practical and completely whole, had become poetic and undependable. Summer sun, indeed!)

"It’s a lady, Mister Katzer," the nurse sang out, her eyes veiled by confusion. I blinked at her. A woman? My son was the only person who came to me these days. He had not been here at all this year, not since Christmas, and it was July. I pushed back the feeling of sadness, replaced it with curiosity.

"Send her in!" my voice croaked. I shuddered inside to hear it. Age had changed it so. I was merely trapped in this body…

My sad thoughts were shoved away when the woman entered. I quickly readjusted my glasses on my nose, but the image did not change. Her? Her? How could it be? My heart skipped a beat, my hand flew to my throat (shaking dreadfully, withered and weak, not like it used to be). I let out a soft cry that was lost to the ears of the retreating nurse.

She was tall, fair skinned with the slightest remains of freckles across her cheekbones. Her hair fell to her shoulder blades, thick and smoky brown, winding down like a waterfall. She wore jeans that hung low on her hips, a tee shirt that stretched across her shoulders easily. Her eyes were gems shaded in the deepest of emerald hues, seeming to glint and sparkle like the gem itself, and were just as precious. Her hands were looped into her waistband, and her faintly pink lips curved upwards slowly as she watched the nurse close the heavy wooden door. She was, simply, the eerie picture of beauty.

"Hello, Daniel," her voice was the same as ever, low alto, wavering like flame but somehow strong as well. It caressed my face like silk, my mouth hanging open uselessly. She smiled wider, her eyes crinkling and her face becoming a beacon of happiness and amusement.

"Delia," my voice creaked like an old staircase.

Her face froze, her eyes grew sad, "Yes. It’s me. Surprised, you silly boy?"

"How…" I shook my head. This wasn’t possible!

She kneeled before me, taking my hands—my old, weathered, snow white, prune-like hands—in hers. Her beautiful hands, as though carved by a master artist, with long fingers and calluses on the palms. They were warm against my skin and I sucked in a breath. Her hands were the essence of youth.

"Oh Daniel! My poor, poor boy. I shouldn’t have come to you but I could not stay away when I found you were here. I wanted to see you one last time," she whispered, leaning her head forward against out hands.

Suddenly I pulled away from her, "You sick, evil woman. What are you, her granddaughter? Come to con me out of my money? Well, I have none! Used it all up on this damn weathered husk of a body! You get out of here!"

Delia lifted her head, her eyes brimming with tears. She looked confused, "But Daniel, it’s me. It’s your one sweet Delia. Please, Daniel!"

"Get out!" I wheezed. She bit her lip, removing her hands from mine, rocking back on her heels.

"It is me, Daniel. Remember the last time I saw you? Before you went away, away to that cursed war? Remember what you said to me? ‘If I never see you again…’" she said, her eyes pleading.

Amazed, I finished the words with her, "‘You will always be my love’. How?"

Delia laughed, throwing her head back and laughing to the ceiling. She placed her hands on either side of my face, smiling at me, "Oh, Daniel! I never loved one quite like you."

"How are you still young? I can’t… I don’t…" I gaped at her.

"Daniel, Daniel!" her voice dropped to a faint whisper. "I never grow old, never will. I’ve been around since the beginning of time, and I’ll be around ‘till the end! I’m immortal, don’t you see, Daniel?" She smelled of the old Delia, warm and sweet like a flower, though no flower I had ever known. I stared back at her, distracted by her face barely three inches from mine. I could remember, suddenly, every moment with her. I could remember the way they had looked at each other.

I was sitting in the bar, cradling a drink and musing over my naiveté. What had possessed me to leave and be a soldier? I had been crazy. I sighed, and tipped the drink down my throat. When I looked around, I saw a woman watching me from across the room. She smiled at me, gently tucking her long hair behind one ear. She was fashionably dressed, with her mouth painted red and a sweet little dress on. My eyebrows rose.

I was no treat, to be true. My nose was larger than my face permitted; my sandy brown hair was thinning at the top already. But this woman, gorgeous, made her way towards him, her eyes never leaving my. My throat went dry; I fumbled with the empty glass, suddenly nervous enough for my palms to go clammy.

"Hi," she said, her voice like a dusty road, warming the soles of my feet. "I’m Delia. What’s your name?"

My eyes blurred as I remembered her. She was exactly the same. Maybe it was the shock of seeing her, maybe it was the way my paper-thin skin didn’t seem to fit any longer, but I believed her. I could believe that my sweet Delia, who had disappeared after so many months of loving, was immortal and standing before me again. She had always been an angel to me, after all…

"I’m not the same," I spoke suddenly, my voice a creaky stair.

She bit her lip and nodded, "No, you’re not. I hate this, Daniel. I never find the ones I love after I leave them. This is the first… it’s so hard to see you so…"

"Old," I supplied, chuckling. It caused me to cough, which caused her to look away. Tears filled her eyes, fading them to a soft ivy color.

"I never remember that time moves on without me," she whispered, half to herself.

"Why are you here?" I asked. She looked back up at me.

"I have a family, Delia. I have a son. I had a wife. I didn’t wait for you…" I moaned.

"I didn’t want you to! I knew it was wrong to involve myself with anyone, I always do, but… I’d like to see your family, Daniel," she said.

"My wife died three years ago. My son lives in the state, but I don’t know where," I gave a bark of laughter. "Pitiful. I can’t move without help anymore, can’t even go to the bathroom by myself! I’m old and tired, and I just want to sleep, Delia. Can you understand?"

The look on her face told me she could not and never would. She couldn’t grasp the concept of aging, couldn’t understand that my body was a shell, no longer ME. It was that look, that total lack of conception that made me realize that it was true. She had never aged. Not one day. She was exactly the same as the last time I had seen her, held her. And, suddenly, it repulsed me. I drew back, biting back a cry of disgust.

Delia stood, then, understanding this. She smiled sadly, a very different woman, suddenly. "I should not have come. They always told me not to come… I am going to leave, now. I can’t understand you and you will never know how I feel. I love you, Daniel. I will try not to forget you… but… sometimes when we go back we forget things."

I knew, as she said it, that it was impossible for her to remember me forever, if she lived as long. How many lovers had she had? How many families had she had to leave when they grew old and she did not? How many friends had she watched die around her? She met my eyes, for the last time. The thread was there, the only understanding we would have.

"Go back?" I asked, watching her shrink away toward the door. Was she an angel, then? Or was she something that the world had never heard of before? Back, but to where?

But then, she was gone, without answering me. I sunk back into the chair, breathless.

I started to laugh. I laughed until I cried, until I coughed, until I hurt so badly I could laugh no more. I was old. I would pass on, and I would live in the heavens, never having a care but to be content and happy. I did not have to live in this world any longer. The memories of my companions dead, they would no longer trouble me. I would one day never have to worry again.

Delia, sweet, beautiful, young Delia would never have the peace I would have.

I laughed.