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Jacqueline ´Jac´ Tanner

"Just a Fool" by Jacqueline ´Jac´ Tanner

SF&F Picture 4 out of 11 by Jacqueline ´Jac´ Tanner
 
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This was done as a ten minute excersise at a forum i attend. Although the original had many mistakes and grammar errors, i eventually fixed it up. This is what came to me from the words Just a Fool.
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Just a Fool
She looked down on her child so sweet, while rocking the cradle. Only two months old and she could hardly believe how big she had already gotten. Her little hands were curled into tiny balls, her mouth lay slightly opened. She had long black lashes just like her mother. Sweet, sweet child. She could stare at her daughter for hours on end and still want more. Being away from her, even for an instant seemed to tear at her very soul, making her rush back to her daughter's side and not leave again until she had to.
She worried that someone would find her and her daughter. She worried they would take her baby away. When Gloria found out she was pregnant she told no body. For months she was able to conceal it, claiming to be putting on weight. Until finally someone made a small comment, tiny really, not even serious. But because of the little comment: "Jeez Gloria you are putting on some weight, almost looks like you are with child!" Gloria had decided to run. She didn't know where to go. So she just left in search of a place to go.
The pregnancy was all very strange. She had only been with him for one night. That one beautiful night, and since then she had never seen him again. He had come into her life with his slanted eyes, lopsided grin and gorgeous flowing hair, and Gloria knew she was in love. He was so mysterious though. He didn't seem to have a home. No, when he left her each night he would disappear into the forest near the town, and she always felt like she could hear him laughing for a long time afterwards.
Gloria's curiosity had soon gotten the best of her and she had followed him. Somehow he seemed to know she was there because he lead her to a very large tree. Suddenly he wasn't there any more. One minute he had been in front of the tree, the next he was gone. Gloria had approached the tree quietly, her curiosity always got the better of her. That's when the most amazing thing happened. One minute she was standing in front of this large oak tree with its branches hanging low. The next she was standing in a large meadow, the stars twinkling above her and the sound of laughter behind her. She turned slowly and her eyes widened at the sight she saw. All in the meadow there were fairies! She could hardly believe her eyes, real life fairies. And there he was, dancing among them and staring straight at her. Not in anger for her following him, but with great love.
He had left the circle than and had come to her. Leading her away to a place away from all the others. She was silent, staring at him and at the silver wings that she knew hadn't been there before. That was the one beautiful night they had spent together. The next morning she had a woken back in her house with a smile on her face. After that she never found the tree again and she never saw him again.
Nine months later she was left with a baby with silver wings…
←- Dragon Peak | The Last Guardian Angel -→

DateNameComment 
8 Jun 2005:-) Katie Collishaw
hmm.. I must say that I'm not seeing how you got "Just a fool." out of this, but eh, I wasn't the one inspired huh? lol. I was thinking more along the lines of a castle's entertainer guy.. But, I loved it anyway!! very good job.. it just doesn't seem long enough..

1 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Its where the words took me. In my mind i was going to talk about a pregnant woman who got pregnant by mistake... but when i opened word this came out instead. Try the words for yourself and see what you ocme up with. Simple phrases sometimes can be the best inspiration"
20 Aug 2005:-) Julia Anna Rill
Oh wow! How cute and beautiful!

Are you planning to write more about this?It almost sounds like a prologue of some bigger story!


But anyway, i like it! You have a great style and a fantastic idea!

2 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Thanks so much. It was written quickly and cleaned up so i didnt mean to do anything with it. I want to maybe write more on it but we will have to see. Thanks again for your comment!"
5 Oct 2005:-) Andrijana Ignjatovic
"Just a Fool", the title, is a bit off, but inspiration can make you wander strange roads.
I for some reason thought of "A Midsummer-night“s dream" and I really like how you portrait the faerie. In my mind a faerie have always been little trickster. I guess he“s not going to raise the child.

21 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Yeah im a tad crazy. But thats what the words bought me. i started writing and i know it didnt really go with what i the title said but i liked it anyways. i wanted to originally keep going along this idea but i think itll stay the way it is until i clean it up one day."
14 Dec 200545 Clarence Likness
This story was unable to keep my attention for very long... guess im getting tired

:-) Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Thanks ok its a very short story and doesnt have as much action as some of the others so i can understand that."
3 Jan 2006:-) Laura de Lange
Short is sweet! Lovely easy read, I enjoyed it. Poor woman, first she had only one night with him and then she has to flee her home and THEN it sounds like her child has a spell on her. Not very lucky, is she? Very foolish...
20 Mar 2007:-) Danielle J. Sanderson
It's really amazing how three small words can turn into something so intricate. I know I never would have come up with even the slightest detail the same, and that's what makes it so amazing. Just knowing that the whole thing sprang from the words "Just a fool"... wow! Good job! 2

2 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Ah yes, words are a great thing for inspiration. Its annoying when you are out and about though. I remember i read an add on a billboard a while ago, constructed this whole story in my head and when i got home it was gone 8 ah well. Thanks for commenting!"
21 Jun 2007:-) L. “Frog“ Janas
I thought that was so sweet! Considering how short a time you wrote it in, the structure was very good. I think if you had the time, it could benefit from a reread/proofread just because some of the sentences are awkward or don't fit so well. Overall, I feel like you captured the main ideas very well in a very small amount of words. Good job ^__^

1 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "*parties like its 1999* You are my 100th commenter *gives you gifts* i feel like i should give you something for being my 100th commenter. Yes this definitely needs to be reread and fixed up and i am planning on doing it one day hehe. Thanks for the 100th comment *dances around* "
1 Jul 2007:-) Dragonsluver
This is so beautiful! I love it! Especially the ending line! There is a sweetness in this story and a quality that makes me think of the older fantasy tales (the ones before Tolkien). Oh! I love this story!

2 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "Awww thanks so very much! This story has many mistakes in it, but i still like the idea behind it! Not sure about the older style stories but i will definitely take that as a MAJOR compliment!"
3 Jul 2007:-) Vera L Scudder
I love this story; it's just too sweet. Funny the way words can inspire an idea just to have it turn into something completely different along the way.

1 Jacqueline 'Jac' Tanner replies: "It is funny that isn't it? Words used to just bring forth images for me and this story would pop into my head and off i would go... been a while since i've been able to do that! Oh well. Thanks for the comment *beams*"
15 Jul 2007:-) Kelsey M. Graham
pleaseohpleaseohplease write another part... you can't just end it there! I mean, you could write a huge long story about her daughter growing up...or something... * gives kicked-puppy eyes* pweety pweeeze?
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About 'Just a Fool':
 • Status: OK
 • Created by: :-) Jacqueline ´Jac´ Tanner
 • Copyright: ©Jacqueline ´Jac´ Tanner. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Fairies, Fairy, Just a fool, Fools, Pregnant, Magical, Tree
 • Categories: Faery, Fay, Faeries, Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc., Romance, Emotion, Love
 • Views: 304


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