"´Happy´ Holidays" by Jenny Olivera

I hate the holidays.

Oh, it's not the holidays themselves, or the weather that time of year, or anything like that. I hate how people react to the holidays. I'd stay inside for two months straight if I could, but a fellow has to eat. So it's off to the supermarket.

I guess what bugs me the worst is how people forget what the whole ideas behind the holidays were. Christmas is the worst - it's much more a department store holiday than any of the others. It's supposed to be about love and acceptance, right? Well this lady I just passed was worrying about whether or not she could out-do her neighbors in decorations and goody-baking, and whether her kid'll beat their kid for the lead role in the church pageant. Love and acceptance. Yeah. Right. And this guy? He's busy telling his whining kids all about how the joy of the season is giving, not getting, while all the time he's thinking about how this year's bonus will finally give him enough money to buy that new SUV he's been wanting.

To most people I seem bitter, and maybe I am. I know a lot of people think that if I just go to a real honest-to-God Christmas party, just once, and feel all the love (ha!) in the room, that I'll suddenly transform like the Grinch or Scrooge. Well, I've been to those parties, and let me tell you, "love" isn't the word for what goes around in those rooms. Jealousy. Resentment. Annoyance. Sometimes lust. That's what I get most strongly, anyway. I guess to a guy who's been cursed with the ability to read other people's thoughts and emotions and no has no way to turn it off, the holidays just aren't that much fun.