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Jenn ´Kirbyina´  Wood

"Land of Purity: Prolouge" by Jenn ´Kirbyina´ Wood

SF&F Picture 1 out of 3 by Jenn ´Kirbyina´ Wood
 
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When I wrote this I thought of how evil beings try and make the lives of the good guys miserable. I used a land of lovlynesse for the heroes and a barren wasteland for the villains . I find this adds charecter.
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In a galaxy only seventy billion light-years away, is a dead planet called Solmen. Although, centuries ago, this barren wasteland was a planet of purity. It was a most unusual planet. Summer was permanent and trees of mauve and lilac grew in patches. It was a magical paradise where Unicorns thrived and Pegasus soared in the clean, un-polluted air. Waterfalls of sheer pureness ricocheted off the smooth rolling hills Purity elves, which also lived on this beautiful land were peace makers and had forever banished all evil from the planet. Every fruit imaginable grew from the purple vines on the colorful trees. The light rain showers and the sun would have reflected off the dew on the long grass for days on end. If anyone searched forever and a day, they would have never come across a more peaceful place. But very few knew that peacefulness was about to be shattered.

 

 

 

While the summer stayed forever on Solmen, a terrible, never ending storm cast shadows upon Sinkandra, planet of darkness. The leafless tree shivered in the wind. Dragons and black eagles buffeted headlong against the raging updrafts in a laborious search of food, which had become scarce. Demons and their death unicorns huddled together for warmth.  The vegetation, which wasn’t very appetizing, had become the last source of edible food. This source too, like everything else, was small as most of the plants on Sinkandra were poisonous .Constant fights were breaking out between species, beast or not, over what little meat was left.  They knew what they had to do. They had to lay siege on the planet of purity, Solmen. But they also had to be patient. They would wit until the mighty queen, Zarcon, had found a mighty warrior, capable of leading the attack. They would wait until they were full of meat, brought by the mighty snow dragons of the northern planet, Prinkston, where a large cache had been made. Then they would lay siege upon the paradise, making all who ruled there servants to do their bidding.  In time the lush planet would be theirs, but like all warriors, they were patient.      

←- The Dragons Flight | Sorrows of Death -→

DateNameComment 
17 Aug 200445 Stephan Calloway
Very interesting - a nice prologue. I will be interested to see how it progresses, please keep me advised when you post more. k?
Giving the "good guys" the "nice planet" and the "bad guys" the "bad planet" gives good reason for things yet to come but you might watch out that you don't get too "common" with the plot as it grows as this type of story is done often.
One other thing I will comment on - the first paragraph is written mostly in present tense with some past - while the second paragraph is written in past tense. This can tend to make the story awkward to read. I recommend settling on a single tense - and would further recommend you go with past tense as that is most common and usually easiest to write and read.
Again, this is very interesting - keep up the good work.

17 Jenn 'Kirbyina' Wood replies: "I know I wrote it kinda weird and i will be posting a edited version very soon 2 "
21 Nov 200445 Magician Girl of Darkness
Oh! I don't think that you should put another one of it out! This one's great! It's really nice!

21 Jenn 'Kirbyina' Wood replies: "Thank you for your support, but i really do have to re-write this."
29 Aug 2005:-) Sophia Tula Rose Dique
lol, I like the way that you spotted some of your mistakes and knew you had to re-write some of it. Don't change the general idea though, I like it.
Just one thing to think about - isn't the plural of pegasus pegasi? I'm not sure but it seems logical. Check it out for me, please 14. Otherwise I thought it was really good.
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About 'Land of Purity: Prolouge':
 • Status: OK
 • Created by: :-) Jenn ´Kirbyina´ Wood
 • Copyright: ©Jenn ´Kirbyina´ Wood. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Dragon, Wasteland, Purity, Good, Evil, Heroes, Villains, Elves, Unicorns, Pegusus
 • Categories: Demons, Imps, Devils, Beholders..., Dragons, Drakes, Wyverns, etc, Elf / Elves, Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc., Mythical Creatures & Assorted Monsters, Vampires, Zombies, Undeads, Dark, Gothic
 • Views: 196


More by 'Jenn ´Kirbyina´ Wood':
The Dragons Flight
Sorrows of Death

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