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C. ´Liari´ Seidel

"Fields of Dawn" by C. ´Liari´ Seidel

SciFi/Fantasy text 9 out of 26 by C. ´Liari´ Seidel.      ←Previous - Next→
 
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A woman waits for her beloved to return from a harrowing test. NEW/EDIT Alright, I give, I gave it paragraphs!
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←- Changed | Immortal Eyes -→

She had waited so long, so patiently, here in the fields of dawn.  As faithful as the sunrise itself she had stood watch.  He had been gone for three long years, years she had spent silent.  She knew the chances of his coming back from the Test were slim, but it didn't matter.  She would wait for him until he returned, no matter what he returned as.  She would know him whatever form he wore.  She had heard the stories, of how men came back from the Test...different

The Test of the Seraphim was not for those of weak will or mind, nor those of evil hearts, for it took the very core of a man and refined it to its true form, altering the body to match the soul.  Some died of the change, some became monsters, but some...some became more.  The last man of their village to brave the Test, however, had come back a hideous monster, slavering and mad.  The poor brute had been killed, both to end his suffering and to protect the people. 

She cared nothing for any of this; she just wanted him back.  So she waited from first light to last, moonrise to moonset, an unmoving icon of loyalty.  She ate only enough to stay alive, and spoke not at all.  She had wasted away until only the essence of  her remained, reduced to a tincture of her being, but how that shone! 

The people watched and whispered of her vain vigil as she held her sentinel in the fields.  They told her that he would come back a beast, a horror, and that she should put him from her mind; she heard not a word.  They told her that he may never come back at all; she merely stood as silent as ever.  They railed against her foolish pride, the same as had sent him on his foolish quest; she set her eyes to the East, deaf to all.  She knew he would return.  She watched the first rays of sun creep over the horizon, secure in the knowledge that he would return this day, for today was the third day of the third month of the third year he had been gone.  So she continued to wait, here where they had said their goodbyes, here in the fields of dawn. 

A breeze out of the East touched her cheek, scented with the last of the flowers, and gently swirled around her.  She turned her face into the wind, her breath catching in her throat.  For it was then that she saw him, gilded by the sunrise, as he walked slowly towards her.  Wings as gold as the morning light gracefully curved over his body, his skin glowing faintly, his eyes a pure and brilliant blue.  He had changed much from the man he had been.  He came towards her hesitantly, as if wondering if she would know him, changed as he was.  For the first time in three years she smiled, and she held out her hands to him.  He took them, looking at her in wonder, seeing the shine in her eyes that surpassed any glory of his.  He pulled her to him then, and held her tightly, as if afraid she would disappear.  She wrapped her arms around him, and pressed her cheek to his.  Two words fell from those lips that had remained silent and still for three years, three months, and three days, and they were the sweetest he had ever heard.

    "Welcome home."

 

←- Changed | Immortal Eyes -→

DateNameComment 
4 Nov 200445 Manda Howard, (sing. ad luna)
Ah, this was good. Intriguing. I think the bit about the poor guy that changed into a monster should be developed more, though. I mean, that could almost be a story in itself. And I'd like to know more about her beloved. Okay, so basically my only complaint is that it's too short. =)

:-) C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "Thank you. I like this one, too. Cec and I were talking about doing more within this world, but it seemed to fall by the wayside, so I guess we'll just see what happens."
2 Dec 2004:-) B Layne
Just came back by to read some more of your stuff. This one was nice. I've been waiting for my "angel" to come home for over a year now, so this story struck a chord with me. I've put up with everyone saying, "He won't be back, why are you waiting?" Sigh, they just don't understand true love. Besides, he'll be home in a couple months! Yay! I just hope he doesn't have wings, though... my car isn't very big! (hmm, it would save him a bundle on airfare if he could fly over himself... okay, okay, I'll shut up now!)

Nice story!

:-) C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "*laughs* Yes, wings may be inconveniant in a car. I'm glad you liked it. This was one of those raw pieces that you write without stopping, which is why there are no paragraphs. I wrote this for myself and for people like you, so I'm really glad that it touched you. I'm also very glad that you came back to read more of my stuff! My new story, Recaptured, is one of my best, I think, if you want any recommendations."
7 Dec 2004:-) Elisabeth Jones
Aah...*sighs* they both did the test! Lovely, lovely lovely...
7 Jan 2005:-) Richard Aaron Bruns
"She would wait for him until he returned, no matter what he returned as."

I like this line a lot. It introduces the magic and tension of the story well.

"She had wasted away until only the essence of her remained, reduced to a tincture of her being, but how that shone!"

I thought that this refered to something magical, like she turned into a ghost or spirit, or something like an angel herself.

This is a lot different from "Stars of Jaed." That story was very specific and personal, while this one is much more vague and allegorical. That is an impressive range of style.

:-) C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "Thank you, thank you! *bows* I also do poetry! No, really, folks... *grins* I did this all in one shot, which is why the whole no paragraph thing, and it was a piece based in emotion rather than my fantastical fevered imaginings as Jaed was. This was a piece meant to reach out and grab hold of people's hearts, to make them think, and maybe to even make them feel. When I said she wasted away I didn't mean completely, but I can see where you would get that. Oh, and if you want really personal, read "Recaptured" Lir is...well, I would actually greatly appreciate it if you would read "Recaptured" For my own reasons, granted, but still. You seem to be able to step aside from the writing and look at it, and I would love to have that applied to that story. I can't step out of it, I can't look at it objectively, and I would love it if you would for me. Thank you for the compliment on my range of style, as well, I never actually thought about it. *smiles* And I will now finish this response before it turns into an epic all on its own. Thank you again."
15 Nov 2005:-) Emma-Jane C. Smith
*sigh* How wonderfully romantic! I shall be in a state of utter wistfulness for the rest of the day!

23 C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "Fwee! That makes me feel warm and fuzzy."
17 Nov 2005:-) Alyssa Bradshaw
Not bad!!! Especially for a one shot deal... I like your style... i would love if youd critique my stuff as im.. well lets just say..NEW.. hah.. wow...
anyways wonderful.
peace
jaidemarie

23 C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "Um, thanks. *chuckles* You sure know how to dole out the warm fuzzies.

Sure, I'll be over there to critique if you'd like, no worries."
18 Aug 2006:-) Bianca ŽBiaŽ Tangermann
A wonderful written image there...I could picture her in her desperate tenacity, perfectly, vividly, like a goddess who isn't aware that she's become a goddess. Brilliant, capture-the-moment work.

:-) C. 'Liari' Seidel replies: "Thank you! Now if only I could convince an artist to draw them both..."
19 Nov 2010:-) Megan E McFadden
oh i think i get it...... pass=become an angel. fail=unspeakable horror, etc. right? either way, great great great.
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'Fields of Dawn':
 • Created by: :-) C. ´Liari´ Seidel
 • Copyright: ©C. ´Liari´ Seidel. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Dawn, Fields, Fieldsofdawn, Seraphim, Waiting
 • Categories: Angels, Religious, Spiritual, Holy, Faery, Fay, Faeries, Romance, Emotion, Love
 • Views: 640

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