Elfwood is the worlds largest SciFi & Fantasy community.
  - 152387 members, 3 online now.
  - 12500 site visitors the last 24 hours.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Lilleah Adora West

"Worthless Bloodshed" by Lilleah Adora West

SciFi/Fantasy text 4 out of 4 by Lilleah Adora West.      ←Previous - Next→
 
Tag As Favorite
 
a short story. as the title says, its got blood, this is different than my other things, thats because i did it for school, it sorta about a gang in a fantasy-type world similar to earth, i still like this story, its bold ;)
Add Bookmark
Tag As FavoriteComment
←- Unnatural Kirin | Quizbeth the outcast -→

(note: this was done for my honors English class [only had 1] the theme was to do an “Ironic” story, as in an unexpected event that contradicts the point of the story)

 

Worthless Bloodshed

 

In a big city, some were in some time, roamed 12 gangs all of which were at constant feud with one another, but two gangs never fight with each other. The GrimReapers and the MadDogs four years ago made a blood oath, the strongest oath any gang can perform, that the Reapers and MadDogs would never battle. The reason, thirteen people died in their last fight. Since that time the MadDogs leader Fang (he is called for he has one- inch long K9 teeth) has backed down from his position and SilverFox has earned his right to be top dog. SilverFox has been in the gang since age ten when he ran away from his foster home; Fang has been like a father to him, Fang is 36 years old. SilverFox is very intelligent and has gotten himself (and the gang) out of many hot-spots through his trickery just like a fox.  SilverFox has literally deep blue crystal eyes, his eyes are crystals, but his name comes from his long naturally silver hair. He has been leader of the pack for three years now; he is only18 years of age.

The GrimReapers leader, ChepShot, is a 22-year-old dirty fighter with raven black hair and metallic gold eyes. The Reapers are a ruthless bunch and ChepShot has no tolerance for those who disobey him, as a female member named Viper soon found out. Viper was kicked out of the Reapers gang, she refused to go on a date and make-out with ChepShot. Viper got her name from her eyes, when you look at her you would say she’s Irish with her brownish red hair and green eyes but her pupils are no more than slits, her eyes are like a snakes eyes. She is about 17 years old. Viper went from gang to gang but none would accept her without going trough the usual painful initiation required, she is still injured from her beating when she was banned from the GrimReapers. When she came to the MadDogs she offered SilverFox 50 dollars to join without the initiation, he accepted her, but did not take the cash. Viper’s new name is She-Wolf.  SilverFox began to fancy She-Wolf

SilverFox: “Wow she’s quite a hottie when she’s not all beaten up, and she’s got quite a personality too.” A month soon past, SilverFox began to show his affection towards She-Wolf, ChepShot noticed this. Just because the two gangs will never fight again doesn’t mean the leaders can’t be enemies.

ChepShot: “Fox seams to be dating Viper, that slut, she’ll go out with that mangy mutt but not with me, how dare she! That’s it I want revenge. BlindScar, Ripper, capture that girl and bring her to me!” BlindScar got his name because he has a scar across his left eye of which is now blind and Ripper always wears spiked knuckles. That night the MadDogs decided to go on a raiding party, She-Wolf paired up with another female member called Whelp, she got her name because she is small like a helpless newborn pup (a whelp), to have a night on the town. They were in the middle of busting up cars and anything they could put a dent into when BlindScar came out from the shadows of an ally and hit Whelp in the back of the head with a board, she landed smack on her face. When he grabbed She-wolf she screamed and yelled and punched him in the face, BlindScar dropped her but then smiled and sprayed something in her face, She-Wolf was out cold. Because of the noise Fang, not only the oldest member but also the biggest and most powerful member of the MadDogs, caught up with BlindScar. But then Ripper seamed to have come out of thin air and tore across Fang’s stomach with his spikes and hit him hard in the face. Spitting blood and unable to yell Fang could not do anything about them getting away. Fang managed to get back to the MadDogs headquarters almost two days later, SilverFox and the gang no matter what the circumstances never let a MadDog be taken away from the pack. They all began to march to the GrimReapers hood.

SilverFox: “what did you do to her you @#*!”

ChepShot: “with who?” he said with a mocking smile on his face.

SilverFox: “BULL! You know who I’m talking about. She-Wolf, if you don’t tell me I’m goanna knock the crap out of you!”

ChepShot: “who the Hell is She-Wolf?” he said still smiling

SilverFox: “I’m goanna KILL YOU!” He tackled the now startled ChepShot

Fang: “NO! SilverFox the oath! You could be banned from leadership!”

SilverFox: “I don’t care I love She-Wolf!”

ChepShot: “you can’t love her I do!”

They began beating on each other worse than before, SilverFox pinned ChepShot to the pavement and punched repeatedly at his face turning it into a bloody pulp, ChepShot wrenched one hand free and strangled SilverFox, the situation went topsy turvey, now ChepShot had SilverFox pined down with one hand in the other a weapon which looked like a handle with two life tearing tusks on it. SilverFox was still holding on to his arm the tusks just centimeters from his eyes if he blinked it would probably tear his eyelids, blood from ChepShot’s face was dripping onto his

She-Wolf: “what are you boys doing?”

ChepShot stared over at BlindScar and Ripper anger in his eyes

 Ripper: “sorry boss she snuck out.”

SiverFox: “She-Wolf, tell us, who do you want to marry me or him. Please She-Wolf tell us so one of us can win you and settle this once and for all.”

She-Wolf: “I don’t want either of you”

Both: “WHAT!”

She-Wolf: “I thought you knew?”
Both: “knew WHAT!”
She-Wolf: “That I was a lesbian.”

 

The end

 

 

                                        

 

           

←- Unnatural Kirin | Quizbeth the outcast -→

DateNameComment 
13 Dec 2003:-) Kaykamisch
The concept of the story is great, and the irony of it at the end. You might want to try re-writing it though, just to refine it and improve upon it. What grade were you in when you wrote this? It could use a bit of revision.
Keep the same story line, just update your descriptions and dialogue. Maybe, instead of saying how everyone got their name, describe them in a way that would make an introduction redundant. Let imagery be your friend, and metaphors (don't just stick to the similies).
In some ways this is MORE than your usual stories, with the dialogue and all (plus it's longer), but it's rough.
It does seem like it would've been worth an 'A', if you wrote it in high school...but you're not in high school anymore, time to update it my friend.
Great potential for expansion. -K

:-) Lilleah Adora West replies: "i am in highschool! 12th grade, i wrote this in 9th, i was only 14, now i am almost 18. the story is kinda choppy but i just let it be, i may redo it, mainly because i want to change the name Whelp to Vixen, its a much more well known canine term and i wanted that character to be a bit more of a slut and the name Vixen is better. this story is still wayyyyyyyy different from anything else i have written, bolder in a way, you should see the image i drew for it, its in my sci-fi gallery, the pic is also a bit more bold, (i normally stick to PG stuff, aside from blood and zombie/undead animals, i am talking gang related/women kind of stuff)"
19 Feb 200445 Guillaume
Actually, I had to do the same thing for my english class not too long ago...and it sorta sucked. I ended up with something about the famous "I brought you into this world, and I can tkae you out of it!!" that mom's usually rant and rave when they're pissed off. Excellent job with the irony. I had a herd time reading it when it was in the sci-fi page, because the words and spaces ran together. Still, liked the story and the pic. btw, i got my little sister hooked on elfwood through your work. ROCK ON!!
1 Dec 200445 Anonomyth
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Be careful or I might laugh myself to death!!
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Good.. FUNNY!!!! ha ha ha
31 Jan 200545 Dragonette
Loved it. Very ironic, not to metion hilarious. I liked the ending, the way it just stopped. Very cool
3 Oct 200545 Summer wanderer of the Hawk Vale
*Howls with laughter* LOL! Great story....
16 Apr 201345 Anon.
Very. Very. Good.
And now I have an ego boost, because I’m pretty sure that some of my stories are just as good! And I’m fourteen too!
Thanks for posting this, I’m feeling a lot better.
Not signed in, Add an anonymous comment to this guestbook...    

Your Name:
Your Mail:
   Private message? (Info)



'Worthless Bloodshed':
 • Created by: :-) Lilleah Adora West
 • Copyright: ©Lilleah Adora West. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Blood, Dogs, Gang, Short
 • Categories: Fights, Duels, Battles, Humourous or Cute Things
 • Views: 903

Bookmark and Share



More by 'Lilleah Adora West':
Quizbeth the outcast
Unnatural Kirin
Draft Unicorn Team

Related Tutorials:
  • 'Writing Action' by :-)S. B. 'Kinko' Hulsey
  • 'The Deception of Description'
  • Art Education Finder...
  •  
     

    Elfwood™ is a site for Fantasy and Science Fiction art and stories. The site was founded by Thomas Abrahamsson and is maintained by helpful assistants and moderators, owned by the Elfwood AB corporation.

    [More...]