|Belief is a power more subtle that others, more potent than hope, more dangerous than fear. It is the integral of all these others, and so, so often, the meaning is lost.|
But the power remains.
Apheori Dianallor is one of Rahah Okieshu's aliases, by the way, and savani is a magic for containing things.
Where is the power without belief?
I believe in freedom, in secrets, in truth, in ending. I believe in the future because of the past.
In a world without time, there was a dream. We were a dream. Nyasa, Yika, me - we were together. We lived our lives, we had our lives, we knew our lives, and we knew our hearts.
We had our hearts.
In our glorious dream, we were a family. We had hope, we had a future. We could whisper to the dark and laugh to the light. The stars would sing for us, and we for them...
But Yika... she was a goddess. So precious and strong, haunting like the fall of shadow, glowing as a wisp of dawn, she stood vibrant and vivacious against all the forces that might plot to remove her from her throne of life. Not a power in the universe could stop her, and she thrived when they tried. And in the rare moments of peace, she would turn to me, that smile glowing in her violet eyes - they were always violet, regardless of how her form changed - and say, "Existence is so beautiful, isn't it?"
And Nyasa, he would shake his head at her and laugh... him I mourn most... for he died, that day. Yika lost her heart... I forgot mine... Nyasa, his died.
It is a strange thing, what can destroy one most... for us, it was the betrayal of time, the infinite dark of the void, the hidden shadows that drift and destroy. The disillusionment of time put the fractures of doubt into Yika's heart... or perhaps they were always there, and we simply never noticed before... so small a thing that overcame her, really, but it is the little that add up.
She spoke quietly. "I feel a coldness."
Caught, her heart broke, inexorably crushed, the pieces scattered on an invisible wind.
I fled; mine, I secreted away, never to be found... better, no?
But how even to speak of such a coldness? How even to describe it for a glimmer of sight to those who are sightless, how even to decribe for an instance that which was so utterly alien? Truly, we were destroyed by what we did not know, because we did not know it.
So how to call by the name of the soul that which has no soul? The shadows came and went in a flicker of an instant, and their impact was eternal.
The frail cloak in which Nyasa had so long managed to shroud himself, with which he had so long managed to somehow keep out all the infinite coldnesses, finally flew from his shoulders and drifted away across the silent expanse of existence. By the coldness, his heart was snuffed, only a tendril of smoky memory remaining to mark its passing, and that soon dissipated like any other.
Nyasa is gone. Perhaps his will lives on, no, I know it does - his was so strong it could not fail. But it alone is not him. Of the champion of hope whom we held so dear, who held us so close together, only the indomitable will lives on, a lost crusader across the dark expanse of the multiverse... never this universe, though, never this one. I would have felt him - his will - if it were so.
But he's out there.
I learned from him, to hope.
Yika, she is here with me, her and her shattered heart. So which is the better, a broken heart, or a heart secure beneath layers of shield and savani, so deeply kept that it can never be reached?
But what can we do but go on?
We have our freedom. We can persevere and move on. We can live out of spite for the despair that clouds the minds of mortals, live out of spite for the dreams destroyed and for the destroyers themselves.
And so, I believe.
As Yika taught me in her own time.
I believe in freedom, in secrets, our secrets, in truth, in an ending to our despair. I believe in a future because of a past.
Yet in the end...
It really does not matter so much what one believes... so long as one believes in something.
There is no power without belief.
Except the electrical kind.
~ Apheori Dianellor
|18 Jan 2008|| Sarah-amy haley|
Awesome!! ~ : )
I really like the way this is told - tragic but beautiful.
Really, really good. Kim Schoonover (FreeBSD/i386 [moose] [ttyv5])
replies: "Thanks! Took me a bit to egt it right... enough that I was satisfied, anyway. o_O"
|2 Feb 2008|| Megan Proverbs|
Very pretty and philosophical. ^^ This one has a better flow to it than some of your others, better wording, I think, and the sentences not too clunky. The metaphors are beautiful.
The reason for their ruin seemed a bit vague, though. "...it was the betrayal of time, the infinite dark of the void." So, it was the tedium and mundanity of their ceaseless existences that finally broke them? Couldn’t they have reinvented themselves? Just... used their powers to wipe their memories clean and start again, experience life anew? Or just end their own lives altogether. Being goddesses, or close to, it would be curious if they couldn’t manage either of those...
Oh well. If all else fails, maybe they can entertain themselves by insulting everyone in the universe in alphabetical order.
I’m not quite sure what the main character is hoping for/believing in. The universe to end, and thus their painful lives with it? But then she said she believed in a future, so that doesn’t really make sense...
Some technical nitpicks... Some paragraphs are double-spaced and some not double-spaced. If you wanna have sentences on a new line, maybe put spaces between all of ’em, just so it looks consistent. Or else use indents, or something.
Oh, and a couple of typos: "She spoke quietely"-- quietly; "The frail cloak in which Nyasa"-- ’Nyassa’
It’s a nice story, though, deep and thoughtful. Kim Schoonover (FreeBSD/i386 [moose] [ttyv5])
replies: "Yes! A helpful comment! *glomps ye*
Yeah, I’ve always had this weird thing in which I like to use a combination of br’s and p’s... dunno why. I do that in comments, too. Sort of like partial paragraphs and major ones. Maybe I should quit doing that. o_O
But his name is Nyasa! Did I spell it ’Nyassa’ before? Oops. >.<
Why does it seem like all the helpful wyverns commenters have left? I mean, besides the fact that they have... d’oh. >.<"
|6 Feb 2008|| Megan Proverbs|
You spelt Nyassa several times, and Nyasa only once. That’s why Nyasa appeared to be the typo.
Heh, minor paragraphs and major ones... Well, you could always invent a new form of grammar, why not. ^^
Oh well, I suppose it’s up to the ones who’re left to leave helpful comments, then. Better keep my Helpful Critiquing Hat in place... Kim Schoonover (FreeBSD/i386 [moose] [ttyv5])
replies: "It must have auto-spellchecker-fixed it. And I only noticed once. >.< *kicks openoffice*
That’s it. From here on out, I’m using gedit. If I can get it, firefox, and nautilus, and who knows what else to even start... GHAH! Now the damn shared library is missing, AGAIN?! What the hell is wrong with this stupid computer?
Aw, fudge. *glowers a bit*
Why do I even bother?
Agh, I hit the wrong button again. o_O
Yes, why not. ^^
I’m terrible at leaving helpful comments. Even sensible comments, I have difficulties... and I also have difficulties not going off on tangents when replying to comments. And not hitting the wrong buttons. And not going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents about going off on tangents..."