"The Visitor" by Roland Gromes

“Err, excuse me...“

“What?”

“I would like to talk to you about something.”

“W-where are you?”

“Here. In your head.”

“Sorry? You’re in my head?”

“Well, not really – actually only my voice is in your head. This way I can directly talk to you.”

“Aha. And what do you want?”

“Well, I would like to take your soul.”

“My soul?”

“Yes. If you could give it to me, I’d be really grateful.”

“Now what? Simply like that?”

“Yes, why not?”

“And, do you offer me anything in return?”

“Offer you something?”

“Well, I thought one was offered something like immortality or power or supernatural attractivity and trades one’s soul for it.”

“You human like these things?”

“Some do. I guess.”

“I fear, I cannot offer you something like this.”

“Actually, I’m not sure whether I’m the type to accept such an offer.”

“Well, maybe I could offer you something different.”

“That would be?”

“Aah, let me think about it…”

“Yes?”

“One moment.”

“Well?”

“Err, well, I fear my options are quite limited. Would you be interested in never having to paint your nails anymore?”

“I’m not painting my nails.”

“Oh, okay… How about the ability to discern different lotions by their smell?”

“Thanks, I don’t think so.”

“Well, then I fear I have nothing to offer you.”

“Okay, at least you’re honest.”

“Why should I be lying? What kind of a business relationship would that be?”

“Sorry, I just thought that the stories I know about this kind of deals rarely tell about complete honesty.”

“Aah, okay. Maybe you’re right. So, I’ll offer immortality, great power and supernatural attractivity in exchange for your soul. Interested?”

“Well, maybe you should better stick to honesty. Lying doesn’t seem to be your biggest talent.”

“I guess you’re right. Thanks for the advice.”

“…”

“So, what about it? Do we have a deal?”

“Sorry? Are you really asking me now whether I will give you my soul for nothing at all?”

“Well…”

“Why should I make such a deal?”

“Are you religious?”

“Not really, why?”

“Do you know what the soul is?”

“Well, I guess it’s soemthing like the essence of a human being, the mind, the emotions…”

“So, you do’t really belive in the soul, don’t know what it is and neither what it’s good for. How do you know you wouldn’t be better off without it?”

“Now you’re getting ridiculous.”

“No, no. Many people are very content with…”

“Stop – stop. We agreed that you should stick to the truth!”

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

“So, actually why do you want my soul?”

“Well, I have to do something, don’t I? I can’t just live with my parents for eternity, right?”

“So this is a job?”

“Exactly.”

“But you are rather a freshman in it, aren’t you?”

“Oh, the contrary! I… no – not really. It’s my first day.”

“So? Do you like it?”

“Nah, not really.”

“So why are you doing it?”

“Oh, my Dad and his father both were soulhunters.”

“Proud of their job?”

“My grandfather was, I guess my father doesn’t really like it that much, either.”

“And why aren’t you just doing something else?”

“What should I be doing?”

“What are you interested in?”

“Well, I like music.”

“Oh, that’s nice. Can’t you become a muse or something?”

“A muse? That’s a job for girls!”

“Oh, please – this is the 21^st century. There are lots of female artists who want to be inspired!”

“I shall take care of girlgroups?”

“You wouldn’t like that?”

“Not really…”

“Well, I guess there are male artists, who would prefer…”

“You want me to be a gay muse?”

“I didn’t exactly say…”

“So I could inspire people like Freddy Mercury, Elton John or George Michael. Maybe sometimes even Robbie…”

“I guess. Maybe not Freddy anymore, but the others – why not?”

“That would be great! But…”

“What?”

“What will my father say, when I give up the family business?”

“Well, maybe I could have a few words with him.”

“You would do that?”

“Oh, how often do you get the chance to fill the world with more muses and less soulhunting demons?”

“Fantastic! I’ll immediately send him over!”

“Err, maybe he could come after work. I’d like to keep business out of this conversation.”

“Oh, yes, of course. I’ll tell him. And thanks again, thank you very much!”

“Ah, and there is something else.”

“Yes?”

“If you get the job, could you send over a collegue?”

“Of course! I’ll do this.”

“Thanks. It’s just that at the moment I can only come up with really weird stuff.”