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Kate "Silverfish" Jennings

"Melaine (poem)" by Kate "Silverfish" Jennings

SF&F Picture 8 out of 9 by Kate "Silverfish" Jennings
 
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I had the first verse as the prologue to a story fragment about Melaine and her sister, and decided to turn it into a poem instead. Heavily affected by the grey sky outside (Queensland - beautiful one day, underwater the next). I do write happy poetry, honestly! Read the poem as you like (and the pronounciation of Melaine is entirely up to you).
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Too many nights, the frost,
Too many days, the rain,
Too many loves are lost
'Ere ever there's spring again.

Melaine sits by the fountain
Wrapped in a rain-grey veil.
Even the sky is weeping,
Even her hands are pale.

Show us your heart, say the golden birds
Upon the blue-star bough.
Melaine once had a heart of fire -
Only of ashes now.

Sing us a song, say the scarlet fish,
Sing as you did of old.
Melaine the sad knows only one song,
And even the tune is cold.

Melaine sings by the fountain
And all those who pass by
Look to the high and marble wall
And think they hear stars cry.

Why did my people bring me
To Tzeran hard and stone?
Why did my people bring me
And why leave me here alone?

She who might once have cheered me
Vanished like rising dawn.
He who might once have loved me,
Like all I loved, is gone.

No fire can be rekindled
When all has burnt away.
I cannot learn to smile again
When sorrow has come to stay.


Statue-like by the fountain
She sits a silent age.
Evening turns to morning,
Seasons turn like a page.

The fountain at last falls silent,
The star-trees fade to grey.
A traveller wanders through ancient streets -
All else have gone away.

And by the wall of a garden,
Abandoned and ivy-grown
He hears Melaine sing to the silence
Through centuries alone.

She who might once have cheered me
Vanished like rising dawn.
He who might once have loved me,
Like all I loved, is gone.

←- Dark Nursery Rhymes (poem) | Taking Wing (poem) -→

DateNameComment 
18 Mar 2003:-) Caitlyn M. Milford
*does first comment dance*

Wow! I love this poem! So sad...and you wrote it so well! Everything flows nicely and none of the rhymes sound forced. Awesome! Keep up the good work! ^_^

:-) Kate "Silverfish" Jennings replies: "Thankyou!"
21 Mar 2003:-) Charles Mills Trowbridge
The rhyme structure is very clean on this one, however, I find the ABCB structure to turn the entire peice into a sort of proto-lymric. Speeking from experence, I can say it's hard to work in a set rhythem like that, and you manage it with alacerty, however, I just dont know it's it the right one to really invoke the mood of the peice, or to deal with the diacotomy's of change/tradition, or how the rain(perhaps life?) gives water and changes earth. In a way it almost makes it cutsie.

:-) Kate "Silverfish" Jennings replies: "Mmm. I wrote the first verse (which is of course a different rhyme scheme) a few months ago and wanted to embed it in something. The poem grew from/around that (and went in a direction I didn't plan).
I know it borders on the cute/trite, and had hoped it would work despite. It's heavily indebted to Yeats's "Cap and Bells". Maybe I'll try tackling the story/theme in a different way. "
23 Sep 200345 Sarah
Very sad i like it very much

:-) Kate "Silverfish" Jennings replies: "Me too. I especially like the last line."
15 Dec 200545 Laura kelly
Beautiful... Absolutely beautiful. You wrote it so well! I'm a bit dissapointed i didn't get the first comment though!
8 Jul 200845 Melaine
My real name is Melaine and I’ve never heard of anyone else with this name before. I was wondering where you heard it? (Found you through google)
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About 'Melaine (poem)':
 • Status: OK
 • Created by: :-) Kate "Silverfish" Jennings
 • Copyright: ©Kate "Silverfish" Jennings. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Eternal, Immortal, Sorrow, Sad, Fountain, Fish, Bird, Tree, City
 • Categories: Elf / Elves, Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc., Royalty, Kings, Princes, Princesses, etc, Celtic
 • Views: 357


More by 'Kate "Silverfish" Jennings':
Dark Nursery Rhymes (poem)
Taking Wing (poem)
Songs of the Downtrodden 4 (poem)
Songs of the Downtrodden 1 (poem)
Fragment and Song
Evening, for Ella (poem)
Songs of the Downtrodden 3 (poem)
Songs of the Downtrodden 2 (poem)

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