"The Monster´s Wish For Me" by Lydia Barker

Why am I here,

All bottled up with fear,

I don't deserve better,

I don't deserve love,

So now I'm leaving you this one last breath,

I hurt so much,

You don't understand,

The harm that can come from a man's hands,

I am so broken,

I am so hurt,

All that I am now is dirt,

How do I find myself?

How do I like myself?

When all that I have been told is to go kill myself,

So this is the last letter,

So much is the better,

Is this the monster's wish for me?

We will have to wait and see,

Why am I not worth it?

What did I do that was so wrong?

All that I did was sing a song,

I'm so sorry that I failed you,

I'm so sorry that I wasn't good enough,

I have tried to be silent,

I have tried not to move,

I have tried not to ask for anything from you,

I have kept your secrets,

I have locked them up inside

So far down, that I have died

I have tried to be pretty,

I have tried to be smart,

I have tried to express this in my art,

There are no words for how I feel,

These feelings are all to real,

There is nothing not flawed in me,

I'm sorry that I wasn't a better daughter,

I'm sorry that I wasn't a better wife,

I'm sorry for my life,

So I'm ending it with this knife.