Elfwood is the worlds largest SciFi & Fantasy community.
- 93463 members, 12 online now.
- 48041 site visitors the last 24 hours.

User:		Password:
Not a member yet? Click here to join! (Help)

StartWhat's NewJoin UsPopularSciFi & Fantasy ArtStoriesTutorialsCommunityFindRulesAbout

Stories / Stories / Tiffany J. Dunn / Text 2 of 6 / Untitled

"Untitled" by Tiffany J. Dunn

SF&F Picture 2 out of 6 by Tiffany J. Dunn

This is one of the VERY few poems that I've ever written. I'm not very good at it . It's actually recent and relates to having to have a young pet euthanized when his situation became hopeless. (Cheery, huh?) Anyway, here it is...

Did I do the right thing

for you, little one?

You relied on me to keep

you safe.

Bright eyes watching

though we knew you were ill.

No time or money or chance

versus happiness.

Are you happy now?

I'm not.

They took you away

and I've been crying since.

We could have tried

but it would have

cost me all.

Not just money, but hope.

Don't hate what I had to do -

I couldn't stand it.

And I won't regret losing you

when we had such time together.

With whispered words

I sent you on your way.

And with love, always love,

I wait to meet again someday.

←- Land of the Green Blade | Hard Lessons (part 1) -→

Date	Name	Comment
31 Jan 2000	Andrea Nichole Walker	Loading... nods quietly
31 Jan 2000	Ryan S Morini	Loading... not bad... definitely not "cheery," but it wasn't totally depressing, either. it kept its head up, i guess. i feel your pain in regard to poems; i really don't feel like i can pull them off, myself, though i've tried from time to time...
5 Feb 2000	Rita Martins R. Silva	Loading... Like you, I don't think I'm good at writing poems, but this one is very touching... very sweet... good work...
20 Mar 2000	Daniel Octavian Bejan	Loading... well...sometimes when you let the emotions carry you away ...you loose the poetry! I mean, I see no poetry or emotion in these ...simple confessions.And the repeated reference to "money" kills all the emotion. I can see some talent here, but ,please, don't just let the ideas to flow on the paper...come back there and try to do some polishing. I am sorry if I am not one of the good guys (ya know , the "great job!I love it " kind) ...I'll be looking again for more of your works.
25 Nov 2003	Lisa Eshkenazi	Loading... Hmm....well, I don't know if I'm qualified to crit a poem considering how little poetry I write. I do disagree with Daniel's comment (And I have read everything on his page--he write great poetry) because first of all, I do think this poem has emotion--particularly the last two verses. And I don't see why the reference to money kills the emotion. What? People with emotions never talk about or worry about money? It's a very simple poem but simplicity doesn't mean 'bad poetry.' I rather like poems that you read and can understand what they're about rather than the ones that you read and say..."Huh?" ANYhoo, the last two verses really stand out to me...they're both done really well.