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Timothy Pontious

"Conspiracy of the Dead - 01" by Timothy Pontious

SF&F Picture 4 out of 24 by Timothy Pontious
 
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If you've read 'Calling All Heroes', you may have wondered where things went from there. Well... buckle up because this might be a long ride. The map is one I created and extracted from a larger fractal image. I'm still not happy with the fonts, but you get the idea. The software I used is from http://www.profantasy.com. And yes, I've changed the name from The Dead War to something.... snazzier.
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The Dead War - 1

Gathering Strength

My name is Bertram. I am an Archivist Brother of the church of Narvad, hailing from the Alliance realms of Jazira near the Sunrise Coast. The tale I tell here is a long one, and has many winding roads. I have documented as much as I can, though I freely admit that I have guessed at some of the conversations and actions.

I was fortunate enough to find a copy of Wolfstone's Journal in the library at Sunwood, from which I have copied the relevant sections to amplify this story. In fact, in our later conversations, he gave me copies of a large amount of his earlier work. Therefore, these are the events as best I have been able to write them.

This story begins on the 23rd of Kronos in the Year of the Hammer, in the Cycle of Flame, in the Turning of the Awakening, also counted as the 317th year of the Age of Swords. I was a small lad at the time, but I recall many of these events and how they affected my own life and family.

So, Revered Brother Blusik, forgive me if I have over-embellished certain parts of this tale. If I have done so I freely admit to having not been completely impartial in my studies of these days.

Illustration alliance2.gif for Conspiracy of the Dead - 01



It was the nervous hour of the night - long before dawn and long after midnight. The soldiers were camped along the muddied banks of a small river, in the time of the season when the spring dew made everything wet each morning.

"Rort, keep your armor on, or you might get zidibugs in your drawers." The guard looked disapprovingly at the other as they both warmed their hands by the fire.

"It's still too cold for zidibugs, isn't it? Zidibugs don't come out until next month. At least I don't think they do. Maybe the zidibugs is going to get in my drawers then." Rort readjusted his armor a little tighter.

"All of our gear is getting wet in this dew and fog, Kit. No spare, dry blankets left. None. Are there any dry blankets, Kit?"

"Heh. That's a good one. Do you think I'd be wrapped up in this flea-bitten horserag if I could find something better?"

"Ah, true. Sorry, Kit."

A slight bluish tint of light played around the coals of the fire for a moment, and then a bluish shimmering area burst into the air above the flames.

"Another one!" Kit pointed Rort first toward the fire, then one of the sleeping figures. "Wake the captain."

Rort walked quickly over to a sleeping form under a heavy blanket and roughly kicked an exposed foot. In a hoarse whisper he urged, "Incoming, sir."

As the captain woke and stumbled nearer the fire the bluish shimmer got briefly much brighter. The guards readied weapons, not sure of friend or foe. Rort and Kit could dimly see through the shimmering area above the fire, where other men in a far distant place also huddled around a fire that was low and steamy from a rain. They looked like alliance troops sure enough, but nobody here was going to take chances.

One of them grabbed up his bundle and walked up to the shimmering portal, tentatively tested the air with his foot, and stepped up and through and then down into the camp as the blue shimmering dissipated. It was as if he had walked over a ramp that could not be seen, that was just high enough to keep his feet from the fires.

"Who goes?" Captain Zurn was not successfully stiffling a yawn. There had been several people through this portal in the last few days.

"My name is Wolfstone, I hail from Tairoe. I bear a message for General Tornwater from General Nord in Faldaen. Which way to the main camp?"

The man was obviously a ranger. His armor was the woven-leather type peculiar to the north end of the alliance lands. It was like many heavy whips had been ringed around his leather jerkin and sewn into place. He had a short beard that matched his somewhat shaggy reddish brown hair. And he practically bristled with weapons from his bow to his sword and several knives that showed from between his backpack and belt.

"I am Captain Zurn. I see that ye bear no shield. Do you have any heraldry?" Zurn was looking the stranger over quite closely.

"None of importance, Captain. Now, which way?"

The captain muttered "Follow, please," and headed up the slight hill toward the large tents with the ranger close behind.

"Did you see that, Kit? He comes in here and not even a salute or a by-your-leave. The nerve!"

Kit put his weapon down and re-wrapped his horserag blanket a little tighter. "Shush you. He's a ranger. They don't salute and they don't care if you care if they don't salute. He can probably skin your arse for breakfast meats before you'd know he had a knife."

"Do you mean they is cannibals, Kit?" Rort looked uncomfortable.

Kit grinned. "No. But he might mistake your arse for a fine hog in the dark."

Rort made a worried face and then grinned because he knew Kit was just joking. Kit was always saying funny things like that.

#

Captain Zurn lead Wolfstone up to the main camp, and to a nondescript tent. "Rest here a bit. I think the general will see you after breakfast - but you can check with his adjutant." He pointed to a tent with a large banner hanging limp in the non-existant breeze. "There. The golden birch tree on a dark blue field is the banner of the general."

"I have a message for him."

"Right. But sometimes, when we're lucky, even the general gets to sleep a bit. Let it wait."

"Thanks." Wolfstone half-smiled at the captain and shoved his gear into the otherwise nearly empty tent.


"The general will see you now." The adjutant flapped the opening of the tent behind him as he left.

Wolfstone walked in, ducking his head, and headed toward the general, sitting at a large table in the middle of a large tent full of chaos. Maps, plots, papers, and spilled ink seemed to be the order of the day. Many of the papers on the table were ruined from spilled ink, bits of food, or scribbles in the margins.

"Ah, Wolfwood is it?" The general didn't rise but motioned toward a roiling pot of taleafa by the fire. "Help yourself to something to warm you up."

"It's Wolfstone, sir." Wolfstone poured half a cup of taleafa - enough to be polite. Then he rolled the large ceramic mug around in his hands welcoming the warmth. He remembered his message, and pulled the parchment out of an inner pocket in the depths of his tunic. It was still crinkly despite the sweat and rain.

"A message from General Nord for you sir." Wolfstone handed the note over. The general looked it over for a short moment and set it aside without breaking the seal - no doubt to get ink spilled on it during some future discussion.

"Thank you Wolfstone." The general sat back in his chair and sighed. "I need some reconaissance. I have sent other rangers to the south to investigate and they have not returned. I fear we are running out of time, but I won't know until I know more about the movements of the Dead. What do you know of the situation?"

"I have not been briefed. I only know what I have heard - that the Dead army moves in strange directions and not at any constant speed. You can't kill the Dead by normal means - they don't stop moving unless they are cut up pretty fierce or something. When a person dies in battle, they rise as one of the Dead, and in this way the army of the Dead is not depleted."

"True enough." The general got up and paced a moment, and poured another mug of talefa for himself. "There's an intelligence behind them no doubt. A necromancer of some sort or a priest of LarShiz." He paused while he seemed to suppress a shiver. "The Dead come in waves. Or singles. They come with weapons or just their hands. They walk the long way around when the shortest route should make no difference. They have stopped for the past few days and we don't know why. That concerns me a great deal."

"So there can't be a very large intelligence involved then. If they have stopped then they have become targets."

"Yes, perhaps. It's hard to say. They have raided into the Foal Valley and have killed many horses. They are more mobile now. Or perhaps they are just waiting for us to make the next move. I wouldn't think the Dead would mind the time."

"The Dead can ride a horse?" Wolfstone sat down trying to soak in that bit of news.

"Aye. Well enough if they could ride in life - though not at full speed. Dead horses can carry the Dead - and they don't mind the smell so much."

"So what is my mission?" Wolfstone leaned confidently back in his chair, sipping his taleafa.

"I'm sending you near a place where we think they may be massing forces. But you'll have to wait for the rest of your team."

"A team, sir? I really...."

"You'll take a team with you and you'll see them back safely. Come back at noon and we will all discuss this further over lunch. That's all for now."

"Aye, sir. But I really don't think I need a team. I have been trained..."

"Blast your training! I have already sent rangers to investigate. Five good people: Watsin from Terrim, Katspaw from the Duchy and her mate Litoe, Breen from Faldaen, and Falconheart. They have not returned. More people will give you better odds. I'm assembling a team. You don't have to like it but you'll have to get used to it."

"Aye, sir. Sorry." Wolfstone got up and abruptly left the tent.


Wolfstone's Journal 23 Kronos. late morning
The trip through the fire portal last night (this morning?) was interesting, but uneventful. It cut about 500 miles off this trip, so they must be in a hurry. This is a typical military camp, and the general here - Tornwater? - is not the most exquisite example of soldiery I've seen. The food is bad, the weather is poor and I need more sleep. In other words, nothing is new. Now the general tells me I am to take a 'team' to investigate the Dead army.

Sadly, the general has told me of the loss of several rangers. I journeyed once with Katspaw in the Howling Hills, and studied under Breen. The other three names I did not know and do not now recall. The loss of Breen is a hard loss, as he was one of the high king's favorites. This is ill news.

If I wanted to babysit I would have stayed in Faldaen knocking some sense into the milksop lads that want to be rangers. I just hope these team-mates that I'll be stuck with know what they're doing. I'll find out at lunch.

←- Wolfstone's Journal - Calling All Heroes | Conspiracy of the Dead - 02 -→

DateNameComment 
29 May 2005:-) Marijke Mahieu
Finally I got the chance to come here and read the first chapter of The Dead War again! And it was everything I remembered it to be...But I hadn't seen that map before! It looks awesome, Tim 2...very realistic! I'm so bad with "inventing" maps, no matter how good the programs are...

As for the story: I love the "not so bright" comments from the common soldiers. That was very convincing! I didn't quite grasp what was happening with the portal, though, till after Wolfstone stepped through it. The description with the mentioning of blue light, didn't conjure up (no pun intended) the idea of a portal to me...but that might just be me...12

As for the rest of the story: very intriguing! It invites to read on and you've certainly made me curious 2. The idea to involve a bit of Wolfstone's journal at the end, to show us the same story in short and from his PoV, works really well. That was a great writing technique 2

Off to read part 2!

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "Ah, well I hope it works. Sort of another experiment, but I do have plans for the next few chapters - should have a couple more posted soon. Thanks !"
26 Jun 200545 Simon Kreszyn
Heya!
I liked your other offering so much, I decided to come back for something else. I liked this story much more. This is quite a shift in style compared to the other story I read- this one was quicker paced. I personally liked that. I have to agree with Marijke that the portal part was a bit odd- I realized what was happening after it happened. I have to say- I love how you cut to the chase with the story- very trim, compact, and streamlined- not a lot of words congesting things up (something I find myself doing all the time. Ha..ha..!). Anyway- I will get to the next part sometime soon. Take care,

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "I struggled a bit with that portal thingy. I didn't want to say, "This is a portal. People can step through this." I decided just to show what it would look like to the guards there. I'm not sure if that was the best choice.... Anyway thanks for the read. I'm looking forward to your comments on the next chapters. "
20 Oct 2005:-) Rachel A Pears
Hi Timothy - told you I'd drop by. I really enjoyed the beginning of your story. I was impressed by the pace, the editing, the dialogue and particularly the journal entry at the end. I actually find it hard to be critical (most unusual). Being hyper-critical I noticed the following - not sure about the name you have given the archivist - it is rather un-original due to the Dragonlance books (Chronicles & Legends). I think they had a Bertram as a historian too. In the text at the beginning Bertram came across as being extremely eloquent and used high-level language - I was therefore surprised that he referred to himself as a 'lad'. Perhaps 'boy' would be more in-keeping with his character? Finally right at the end you used 'loss' twice in close succession (loss of Breen is a hard loss) perhaps you could use a different word? I too found the portal description a little unclear - I thought that an enemy was materialising or something. You might want to clarify?? I don't want to finish on a negative note - I think your writing is excellent. I also appreciate the comment you left on my shelf. Regards - R

9 Timothy Pontious replies: "D'oh? It's been about 100 years since I've read the Dragonlance epics. Bertram was my grandfather's name, and I thot it had a nice ring to it for an archivist. Thanks for the catch - not sure if I'll change that or what. And that portal thingy - I was trying to sort of surprise the guards there. Back to the drawing board I guess. Thanks for your comments! Let me know when you post some more and I'll come 'round for a read or two."
22 Oct 2005:-) B. Layne Weaver
Ooo, i’ve been wondering what happened after that wonderfully rousing ‘calling all heroes’ speech ((and I still love you for including women in that! ^_^))

“I am an Archivist Brother of the church of Narvad...” should ‘church’ perhaps be capitalized? If the full name is ‘Church of Narvad,’ then aye, I believe it should be capitalized 12

Yay for maps! Nicely done ^_^

“Rort walked quickly over to a sleeping form under a heavy blanket and roughly kicked an exposed foot.” O_O Would someone really ‘roughly’ kick a superior officer?

((I’m curious if there’ll be any female warriors in these chapters since some of the ones who left the tavern to join the fight were women. You won’t let me down, will you? ^_~))

Nice descriptions of Wolfstone ^_^ I could practically see him before my eyes as I read. I love that sort of detail!

“...He can probably skin your arse for breakfast meats before you'd know he had a knife." 1 Hehehe... I like that!

"No. But he might mistake your arse for a fine hog in the dark." XD I like that even more! *snorts*

“Captain Zurn lead Wolfstone up to the main camp, and to a nondescript tent.” ‘lead’ should be ‘led,’ and I think the comma after ‘camp’ is unnecessary

There are a couple places where Wolfstone is interrupted by the general, and you’ve used (...) to indicate the interruption. An ellipsis is actually used for a slow drawing out of words or for an omission of words. A dash (--), in my opinion, would work better as a sign of dialogue being—interrupted. ^_~

“Katspaw from the Duchy and her mate Litoe” HAH! You HAVE used a woman! *dances* You’re awesome, you are. Too bad she bit the dust, but I’m so happy that she seems to have been seen as an equal. Woo-hoo for Tim!!!

Very nicely done, good sir. I'm glad I didn't have to wait until winter break to make my way over here (I've set today aside as a reading day--a free day! Can you believe it?!) I think I have one or two more stories to read and I'll be all caught up on your shelf once again. Yay!!

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "Would someone really ‘roughly’ kick a superior officer? You betcha. How else is he gonn wake up?Thanks for all of your comments on this. I'll promise to try to get the 'lead' out. LOL"
31 Oct 2005:-) Keith D. Brooks Jr.
First off, I LOVE the map. Mine is hand drawn and I do not know how to include it in my work as I am fairly new to HTML. Yours is wonderful, as is the story so far. I like the POV change at the end and now I must read on! 2

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "I have the whole planet mapped with a fractal program from profantasy.com. Their 2-D software is also pretty good and I've used it lots for my own campaigns and world building. Sometimes I'd rather play with my maps than play a game. I have an ominous geek level for that stuff...."
23 Nov 2005:-) Matthew J. Hillary
I repeat. Sweet =)

Someone on the last chapter had mentioned that somehow the story reminded them of American History. I kind of got that in this chapter. The book, "My Brother Sam is Dead" has a long part where the US forces are stationed in this small town and the situation your boys were in, cold, running out of practical supplies, etc, etc, really reminded me of that. At the same time, though, I think that previous read helped me build a pic of your work.

Chapter 2 seems like it aughta have some cool happenings 12 The content of conversations was good too. The zidibugs, necromancer, etc. The whole concept of the story is cool too. A war with the dead. A similiar thing happened in a series called, The Prydain Chronicles, from Loyde Alexander. In his book, though, it was the dark lord of Anuvin (or soemthing like that), whome though corpses into the black caldrun and they came out as his undead slave warriors. They knew what it was from the start though. Your guys have no idea what they're fighting. That makes it a bit cooler 12

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "I like to think that Chapter 2 has some surprises. Be sure to tell me what you think of Chapter 4, because that was sort of a gamble. =D. And thanks for the tip on the Prydian Chronicles - I may have to look that up!"
12 Jan 2006:-) Miriam Doris Plachta
Great beginning! I went through a zombie movie phase some years back, and am still quite a fan of dead armies. The title just makes me shiver.
Welcome! Heheheh
I'm very impressed by how you managed to convey so many details about the world/ characters/ situation without resorting to long, boring info-dumps (a specialty of mine.) You have a gift for entertaining conversation.
Aw, shucks.
I also like the sense of depth created by the frame story-- although Bertram seems to go beyond "guessing at some conversations and actions" (Kit and Rort's discussion about zidibugs, for example.) Maybe he could mention in his "apology" to Blusik an unavoidable tendency towards storytelling?
Aye, that's a good idea....
A few small suggestions:

"Wolfstone walked in, ducking his head, and headed toward the general, sitting at a large table in the middle of a large tent full of chaos." --> Something about this sentence bugs me (although it's probably grammatically correct)- it just seems long. I would suggest either taking out the comma after "general" or maybe "and headed toward the general, who sat [was sitting?] at a large table..."

"It was still crinkly despite the sweat and rain." --> Does moisture uncrinkle parchment?

"A message from General Nord for you sir." --> I think there should be a comma between "you" and "sir."

"The general looked it over for a short moment and set it aside without breaking the seal" --> Did he read it? I get the impression he didn't, but why wouldn't he? Is he that bad a general, or am I not understanding something?

One suggestion for Wolfstone's journal: would he maybe include, in addition to the date, his location? I don't know if he travels much, just seems like something a soldier might do...
Hrm. All very good suggestions. I'll keep them in the hopper for the next rewrite!

I can't wait to see what sort of characters make up his team. Again, I loved this beginning-- it's fun and easy to read, retains interest, and builds up some suspense. Wolfwood (hehe, jk) is an interesting character, I really like his sarcastic journal voice and how it contrasted with the way he spoke to the general and other soldiers.


:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "Some of the bits you noted are probably elements I did not completely remove when I had changed my mind. I appreciate your sharp eye for that. I'm in the middle of re-plotting everything after Ch 4, and when the dust settles, I'll have more to upload - hopefully not too far down the calendar. I hope you enjoyed it well enough to read the rest! Thanks for your visit!"
30 Jan 200645 Christabel Nolan
Wow, you have lots of people reading this, I guess I shall join the list! I really enjoyed reading this chapter. It was easy to read, entertaining (I love the banter between the soldiers), and the descriptions were good. You weren't trying to be fancy with this, which is one of the things I most liked about it. Sometimes people get too carried away with the whole idea of fantasy, but they forget to give the characters minds of their own, and their conversation/actions seem stiff. You have avoided this, so well done! I liked the idea of the fire portal too, and the yawning guard. And your map is awesome!!

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "I'm glad you enjoyed your visit. I hope you like the rest of it too!"
26 Feb 2006:-) Smokeleopard
As always, an excellent job!

There's been a lot said about this piece and I pretty much agree with most of the comments. Dialogue is great. The ass = hog comment cracked me up! Quick pace. Great 'mood'. Leaves you wanting to read on. A couple of things I'd like to add though;
I admit I also needed to reread the portal scene. I recon it just needs a bit more fleshing out though. Basically, just a couple more sentences describing the portal itself and maybe a word or two about what the soldiers think about it (ie they're used to it, or no matter how often they see one they never get used to it, etc)
The other point is that I'm not sure I get that the soldiers feel at eased giving the captain a kick to wake him up. I mean, maybe he's a 'one of the boys' type commander but still, somehow it doesn't sit well.

Well, that was a lot to say about two minor points!

The piece is great though. It's got your excellent casual-hand style and it's also got three of my favourite fantasy things;
1. A map! Awesome. I bought one of the eary versions of ProFantasy's Campaign Cartographer and spent years tinkering on my world, Dawn. I LOVE a good map! Is there a bigger version posted anywhere?
2. Undead armies! Gotta love 'em!
3. Well, what else? Wolfstone, of course!

Ok, that's far too much rambling. Time to check out chapter two!
1

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "Good points as always. Thanks Jeff! 1) I have a larger map but it is not completely labeled, and it is not posted anywhere yet. I may have to do that in chunks. 2) I'm curious to see your reaction to future chapters! 3) Wolfstone does tend to get around. Glad you stopped by!"
2 Jun 2006:-) Alexandru Moisi
Nice... yet...
I think your story lacked on descriptions a little bit and maybe on motivation. It seems just like an excuse to send Wolfstone (love the name) into the middle of the fight. Oh, and wouldn't it be easier for one ranger to sneak around than a team?
Despite those little nits I would give it an overall B+ just archivist's voice is so cool!)
All the best,

:-) Timothy Pontious replies: "I don't exactly like my beginning, but I had to jump in somewhere. If I redo this, it will probably be quite different. Thanks!"
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About 'Conspiracy of the Dead - 01':
 • Status: OK
 • Created by: :-) Timothy Pontious
 • Copyright: ©Timothy Pontious. All rights reserved!

 • Keywords: Undead, Zombie, Army, Battle
 • Categories: Magic and Sorcery, Spells, etc., Vampires, Zombies, Undeads, Dark, Gothic, Warrior, Fighter, Mercenary, Knights, Paladins, Wizards, Priests, Druids, Sorcerers...
 • Views: 329


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Desire (poem - sorta)
Tim's Tirran Terms
Wolfstone's Journal - About Herman
Conspiracy of the Dead - 03
Conspiracy of the Dead - 05

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