| 24 Sep 1998 |  Skisko (#39) | Good stuff. You remind me a lot of Tolkien with third person perspective. Keep writing, I'd like to read more. | |
| 30 Sep 1998 | Laura Chase (writer 58) | He's right. Your writing reminds me of Tolkien. Keep up the good work, and tell me when you put up more stories ^-^ | |
| 24 Aug 1999 | Soonsim | you remind me of the elves in lunacemarn | |
| 7 Oct 2001 |  C. Marie Raynor | hmm..your stories have potential. I'm a huge Tolkien fan too  But, in your stories, I would describe a little more, especially because you're int he third person view, which is what I do. A huge part of narration is image. The best way to really get a reader into the story is to have them feel like they're there, give them ability to picture the scene, the details To see and feel the emotions of the characters. try pretending that you're were actually there, and pretend like you were telling the story to someone who wanted the details. I find that helps me, atleast C-ya | |
| 17 Dec 2002 |  Chyaz Samuel | Yo dude!
How old are ya? I am 14 man!
WOOOOOOOO!!!
Chy | |
| 24 Feb 2003 | Delles | you need a little constructive criticism:
more discriptions, please.
get into the story, more depth, more info.
how do the familys work, character interaction?
We need more
have a super happy fun day! | |
| 2 Feb 2004 |  Dennis Scott Thornton | Hey there. I think I read your story about the dark forest a few years ago on Kidpub or something. I still have the printed version. I'm glad to see you here and hope you write more stories. I liked the others on the page. | |
| 25 Jan 2005 | Anonymous | Honestly, if you are in high school you should be writing better than that... | |
